Do (married) woman tell their best friends about their black dick addiction?

[Lilly19]

I'm not married, but all my friends and especially male friends know that I just want Blackboy!
For me there is nothing to hide about something like that.

 

[Harmoni Kalifornia]

Great to see you chime in on this Nice to hear first person perspective of some one who's actually 'out'! There was a definite lack of women in the scene being open. I think the likes of Katie Cummings never imagined the internet to be the medium it is today when they recorded those videos. I too admire you being 'out'.

Are most friends that know of your lifestyle also sexually open or are there also vanilla (sex wise, not color wise, might be important to mention on b2w ) friends in the know? If so any difference in reactions?

Do you personally feel there to be a difference between the black owned kink and say random kink 'X' on Fetlife; simply because it's perhaps viewed as political incorrect or morally abject by some? Do you feel a need to explain any of this to your friends? (or your husband)

Hope i'm not being rude, it's something my wife and I recently discussed when we started talking with a local couple and were for the first time discussing it with others we might actually meet that were not black bulls

Thank you for the compliments, I am sorry it took so long to see your other questions. I am going to give a short answer, read more in the ask Harmoni section of my site.

Our friends that know of the lifestyle are 1 to 4, LS vs. vanilla. No difference in reactions, all wish us well. Some were expecting this step.

I think because of latent racism IR is different. For example on sites like xhamster and imagefap it is a running joke about the people who will take the time to rate EVERY SINGLE IR PHOTO IN A GALLERY its lowest rating. That doesn't happen in any other sexual category.
I don't explain to haters online, however to friends and the curious (my phlebotomist for my testing) I will give honest answers to sincere questions.
Sorry for the delay!
Harmoni

 

[Torpedo]

I come at this issue from a slighlty different perspective. Me and my wife have an open marriage, we aren't ashamed of it, it's just that we don't flaunt it or wear a neon sign announcing it to everyone. 2, maybe 3 of my wife's friends know about it, while none of my friends know, and obviously our families do not know. As i said, it's not about shame or guilt, I'm just old fashioned and believe that our personal lives should remain private.

One of the illusions that many many people have is that persons in an open relationship will have sex with anyone. Generally nothing could be farther from the truth. Just because a relationship is open doesn't mean it isn't selective.

Within the group there are definite preferences.All members of the group are referred by existing members so there is obviously some discussion about intimate sexual activity with others. Since we haven't had a confidentiality problem since I have been a member I would assume the women have been very selective who they discussed their "hobby" with.

I too prefer to keep my personal life private. There is nothing to gain by flaunting your achievements in or out of bed.

 

[Steele@730]

I'm not married, but all my friends and especially male friends know that I just want Blackboy!
For me there is nothing to hide about something like that.

That is great to hear bella but Italia looks at color a little differently that the states. I was shocked when a friend of mine as me "come mai pregiudizi in America"? I like the way most of EU looks at that. Ci vediamo più tardi

 

[Yuki_Stern]

mhm... I dont have problems with telling my friends about what I like.
I have friends, who dont want to be part of my sexual live... So I am not going to tell them forcely.. If they ask me, I tell them, if not then not.
But all in all.. my friends, besties and also non besties, know that I love big cocks and I love black guys.
They always ask me if its true abt the size... And I say.. yes... with all them I was in contact its true
Then they want to know more and more, and I tell them what they want to know.
But I have to say.. my life is very open minded and my friends know it. I just have a few friends who are not interested in my fucking life... but its also ok for me.

Its not a big deal for me... at least, everyone fucks... so why trying to hide something, what is not hidable? Maybe in this case I am just to german

 

[LynneC469]

Depends on the friend

 

[Ann4BBC]

Telling your friend can have a negative affect though. I posted before that my best friend became aware of what i do, why i have my QoS tatt and my black 'boyfriend'. She met a new guy after splitting from her husband, and i havent gone out with her in quite a while. I get the impression shes avoiding me. Not sure if its because she doesnt approve or because she doesnt want her new guy to think im going to lead her astray.
I did try and get her on board at the start but let it go.

 

[DeeDeeinCO]

Because we have had men live with us, it would be a bit tough to hide our lifestyle. We are very open. When we have gone to the adult theater, we have met male friends of both mine and husband's. And they have fucked me, and they have told others. My mom-in-law knew that my husband's ex-wife slept with others, and she and my *******-in-law expected that I would, too. When we had a man living with us, my best friend lived with us as well, for a time, and she got to know our live-in very well, and her parents and her sister found out from her about our lifestyle.

My own sister knew about my sexual past, and when we had Black Men living with us showed interest in the lifestyle. Soon after that, my sister-in-law asked me about our lifestyle and got into it shortly afterward. My husband's ******* was dating a Black Man and invited me and my ******* to join her and her boyfriend. And we did. My other two sister-in-laws asked me a lot of questions before they got into the lifestyle. So, it happens. Three of my nieces are currently dating Black Men and no one has said anything negative about it.

Thanksgiving at our house this year was awesome. We had our ******* over and I had family over, and our live-in, who is Black, invited several of his single friends to join us. We had a full house. My *******, my husband's *******, my sister, my sister-in-laws, my nieces, my best friend and her ******* and I kept disappearing throughout the day to spend time with our live-in and his friends. My mom-in-law even got to have a little fun as well, with a younger Black Man. We had a lot to be thankful for, and Thanksgiving is a time to give thanks. And that's just what we did.

One of the women that my husband works with came over for dinner a few months ago and asked a lot of questions about our lifestyle. We were very open and honest in answering her questions. She was very interested since her ex-husband hadn't been very sexual. This woman my husband still works with has been in gang bangs we have had at our house since that time. She admitted that she had always had an interest and was happy that we were so open about it. Recently, this same woman that my husband works with , told us that her ******* had some questions as well. And we are having my husband's co-worker and her ******* over this week for dinner.

Another of my friends has always dated Black Men, and her ******* is half Black and half white. Her ******* is a very beautiful woman.

My ******* and our live-in worked on a house owned by my husband's boss a couple weeks ago. My husband's boss is white and she knows that our live-in, who works with my husband, lives with us. She asked some questions and I was honest with her. My husband's boss is divorced and is a very high class type of woman, yet she admitted that she has a hidden slutty side of herself that she has wished that she could let out. My husband's boss and I went to a local swing club a week ago, just her and I, and she let her slutty side of herself out, in a big way.

Before me and my husband's boss went to the swing club, I called one of my Black lovers and asked him to be there. And he showed up. My lover was my husband's boss's first at the club. He is Black, tall, stocky and very well hung. My lover rocked my husband's boss's world. My husband's boss ended up fucking several other men at the club. I would never tell anyone we know about my husband's boss's new life, but I am glad she trusted me. And I am glad that she trusted me enough to ask questions in the first place.

My husband and I, living as open as we do, has allowed others the opportunity to get answers to questions they have always had, and the opportunity to play and know we not only understand but accept them and their desires. Having relationships with Black Men is not as stigmatic as it used to be, thankfully.

My ******* lives with us, and he knows of mine and my husband's lifestyle, but we don't do anything overtly sexual around him. My ******* does know that I have relationships with other men, but he doesn't want to know, and I don't tell him, any details. My ******* sees me kiss and hug our live-in, and he knows that me and our live-in sleep together, but we haven't made it out to be something taboo, or anything. My ******* has only said that he likes to know that I am happy, with whatever choices I make.

I have never felt it was right to hide who you are or who you love.

 

[Ann4BBC]

It's a tricky thing figuring out how far you can push it with people.
I may find female erotic behavior erotic in all it's forms, but i would ******* my girlfriend if i every caught her with any other man.
If I caught her with another women behind my back? Maaaybe i would let that slide.

Men like me who have actually killed other men, relax it was in a war, do not put up with other men fucking our women.
Those who are not willing not *******, will not fight to the death for there women.
I would never raise another mans bastard kid either, thats for genetic losers.

Your friend maybe dating someone like me and she knows he would ******* her and the guy or at the very least drop her.
If her boyfriend is an Alpha she will do anything for him, so more then likely he white boy friend is alpha in money, in killing, intelligence, or swagger.

I know what you mean. I still find it strange that my hubby can want me to go with other men, black or white. He has met my guy, shook his hand and thanked him for 'looking after me'.
You might be right that my friends new man might be more protective. Mind you,she does have ******* from her ex husband and a previous ex boyfriend, whereas my hubbys ******* are his!

 

[time2try]

I know I wouldn't.

 

[bellnyc]

my gf told her friends that she said "wouldn't judge". i don't think thats true, they still judge, nobody can wrap their heads around someone wanting a guy with a big black cock to fuck the person they love

 

[Chungcheng21]

I do not think some wives discuss this issue with their friends. Some wives want to conceal their secret.

 

[Chip]

My wife would need to know the friend or family member could keep a very delicate matter secret, its one thing to enjoy black cock but being married and having ******* brings other fators into play. I know my wife would not want me to suffer for her black cock desires but would hate to have the ******* put in a bad situation so believe she says nothing.

 

[Ann4BBC]

I do not think some wives discuss this issue with their friends. Some wives want to conceal their secret.

Yes, i agree wives might want to keep it secret. In my case, my friend had just finished a bad marriage and was up for fun. I have known her many years and thought it would be fun for her, and i would have a friend to 'play' with in this lifestyle. I didnt tell her at first but she noticed the QoS tatt, also i was flirting with guys and getting guys ring me, so i told her.
As it was, she wasnt interested and went on to find a new boyfriend. If i had known i probably wouldnt have been so open with her.

 

[lotsatna4u]

I have one best friend that knows that I am in a cuckold marriage and I love having sex with black men, other women would be judgemental. That's why I come here, so I can be me, let loose and have fun. But I wish I could tell the world I love getting fucked by hung black men.

 

[Ann4BBC]

If your goal is to bring her into it, then testing the waters is a good idea before out and out saying it to her.
Watch a main stream movies with intense interracial sex in it.
Such as Delta of Venus or is it Venus of Delta. Another one in Cynthia Van Damme in Emanulle?
Both are main stream and it will not expose you, but allow you to watch her reaction when she sees the scenes.
Do it when you know she has not had sex for a while, then have girls movie night with wine or something.
A female friend of my told me this, except she is bi-sexual and does it with Lesbian stuff instead. It is young college girls she does it too to test the waters.

Thanx for this. Ive sort of blown it with my friend though, as i kind of rushed into telling her, should have done what you suggested. I am trying with someone else at the moment though (as some on here might know) so will try your ideas more.
It just shows you cant assume about people, my friend had always been flirty while married. I thought she would jump at guys when single, but she didnt and has gone straight into another relationship. I think one day she will regret not having some BBC fun before settling down again, but each to their own.

 

[flsubboy4u]

The thing is with a kink like this; it's based on stereotypes that on the surface and perhaps even after deeper analyses is inherently not widely accepted. On the internet it's great that this whole 'thing' took off. But what exactly is this 'thing'.

Cuckolding, hotwiving, black bulls, MWF, white bois?

That's what this thing is on this website. Sleeping with a black lover might get discussed with friends if the peer group one finds themselves in is tolerant of this. Emancipation and all that...

But not the kink we discus on these boards. The swinging lifestyle is often just shared with like minded friends. A lifestyle based on racial play is even more socially awkward to confide a friend with. It's because we live in a society full of old stigmas and anti sex doctrines. That's why it's not something you share freely if you hold a position in this society where these 'values' matter.

This however is exactly why most of us enjoy this kink so much!

While I understand what you are saying and while I do not know your social circle or culture, everyone has their secrets. There are many different levels of trust If you can't share what you do interracially with a "best" friend and expect discretion I would have to ask how good a friend she really is. Moreover, nothing can change if we all just accept the current dogma regarding race and status. Someone always has to be the brave one and be the first to jump. Strength of character is always recognized and those who are in position to be hurt by violating socially accepted but dogmatic principles of what is acceptable and what is not, are likely to be accepted and followed provided they articulate their reasoning to their associates and followers. Their credibility will outweigh and eventually change public opinion. This is true only if they have enough strength of character is follow their ideals and a deep need not to be hypocritical. While this could cause pain in the short term, the wisdom of racial equality is undeniable once thought out and if my peers can't think it out, they can't be my peers regardless of their social status.
At some point it comes down to how well I live with myself. Pretending to be what I am not for social or economic advantage is self destructive even if I know I am doing it, if it violates my true principles. Ultimately, those who "respect" me must be those who respect who I really am. Only in this way can I truly have a 'best" friend.

 

[Ann4BBC]

In my case its not a question of breaking social barriers about race, though. Its very acceptable here, almost the'norm' for white girls to go with black guys. What my friend frowns upon, or doesnt understand, is me being married and going with another guy with husbands blessing.
I agree with flsubboy4u though that it will take brave people to publicly declare their type of marriage, ie white wife, white hubby, black other partner. I think the more that openly declare this will open some small floodgates for others. Im not one of those brave ones, but would declare it like s shot if it became publically acceptable.
I can only compare it slightly with homosexuality, that it was 'hidden' for years, then brave guys and gals started standing up for themselves in public, it became legal and most people dont think anything of it anymore. Hopefully that is how this lifestyle will be like in the years to come. X

 

[Janice K]

I have one best friend that knows that I am in a cuckold marriage and I love having sex with black men, other women would be judgemental. That's why I come here, so I can be me, let loose and have fun. But I wish I could tell the world I love getting fucked by hung black men.

Don't be to surprised that you might find that there are a lot of women that " wouldn't be so judgmental about your black affairs. Yes, you might find a few but I have found that many more are very interested. In fact, I have found that many of them that I have told about me, have had the fantasy of having sex with a black men. Some of them have even admitted that they've had previous affairs with black guys while in college or earlier times in their lives. Some are even very envious of the relationship I share with my black boyfriend. The interracial lifestyle is growing more and more popular every day so again, I wouldn't be surprised that many of your friends would be very interested, or even envious, about your black affair. Who knows,.. you just might influence some of them into seeking out a black lover also.., IF they don't have one already..

 

[CuckCpl4BBC]

YUP....especially if I have a couple drinks and there was a recent hook-up I was still excited about...