Thanks for your input. I will update, but before I do, I'll just say that you were a bit late and I ended up doing the opposite of what you suggested, though it hasn't ended up with a fallout between me and my mom (thankfully.)
Now for the update...
I did as some of you suggested and approached my mom about the situation. To my surprise, she made it as least awkward as she could and was very open about the whole thing. I was expecting to hear that it was probably just a passing phase she was having, but just as you thought, she explained to me that it was actually her 'bulls' idea and he was pushing it. She feels as though it would be wrong of her to deny it and that it would be better for their relationship if she had his baby. I expressed my concerns to her and told her that I don't think she's really considering my dad's point of view but she seemed to have thought this out a lot better than I was expecting and had answers for everything. By the end of our discussion I felt as if I was almost begging for her to change her mind about the whole thing but the points I (and many of you in your private messages) thought were very rational and clear suddenly didn't seem to amount to much when she could counter them.
I think my efforts, if anything, further cemented her ideas that this is what she should do and the fact that she could counter every one of my points has made her even more sure that his is a good idea. As it stands now, I know she has discussed the topic further with my dad and has told me that most likely she is going to go through with the pregnancy.
As I'm sure most of you can imagine, I was pretty upset and shocked by this as until this point, it had only seemed like some kind of fantasy of theirs and not something which would become very real. I'm trying to deal with how this is really going to be and took quite a lot of comfort in your post, Ycom, as you reminded me about how really at my age this is going to have a fairly minimal effect (hopefully) and I should be out of there soon within a few years anyway.
(Sorry for the long post by the way, just a lot of information to give and a rather large update I think!)
In regards to information about my mom and family, I think I've missed out quite a bit in previous posts and I think some of you may be surprised by what I'm about to say.
To start with, my mom is still able to have ******* (she made that abundantly clear).
I know the website is called black to white, but I'm sure my story is no different. Probably should have mentioned this earlier but anyway, here it is now: my family are NOT white. We are actually of Indian descent but all born in the US. HOWEVER, thanks to my dad's occupation and the school's my sibling and I attended etc, we pretty much only have white middle-class friends and fit very well into that lifestyle. The only thing differentiating us from your typical privately educated middle class white closed friend group type is that we're brown! So please don't let that change any preconceptions you may have already built about my situation assuming I was white as they still 100% stand.
This may sound a little stupid but you'll have to understand, the reason I didn't mention this before (if it was expected of me anyway) was because I didn't want to cloud anyones ideas about the situation as I know quite often knowing that we aren't white on the outside can come with untrue preconceptions about things like religion, family values etc. Not to mention that really, I forget that I'm not white sometimes!
Anyway I hope this isn't such a big shocker to you all and you can carry on advising on the situation as if I were white and my family's situation was as you imagined it before.
Future: I'm thinking that the best way to go about this seeing as my mom has made up her mind is to make the best of what I can only describe as a bad situation. Hopefully the idea will grow on me and I will one day understand why she feels as though 'it would be wrong to deny it'. I told her that there is an online community who are knowledgeable about this whole thing and may, if you all think it's a good idea, give them a little info on this site so they can join and discuss whatever goes on in the future.
Again, thanks very much for all the help and advice so far. I think you've all helped me feel better about the whole thing even though it doesn't seem to be heading in the direction I was hoping for. I'm sure some of you might be a little confused about the bombshell I dropped about my family's ethnicity etc, so I'd be happy to clarify anything if you want.
