Where do these lifestyle events take place, and when you go to one of them what do you see and experience? Can you give some details please.
Well, by far the biggest one we go to is Splash Mocha. Searching for that term on this site or on Google should give you a pretty good idea, but:
3-day entire hotel event focused on interracial/hotwife play with on-premise themed play areas like the Red Room (dungeon), wife watching room, glory hole room, etc. and a different themed dance party every night. It takes place in Ft. Lauderdale, Atlanta and Houston (so far). The Florida event has a clothing optional pool party each day. Single men are carefully vetted, ladies are scantly clad and on the prowl, cuckolds (while not the majority) are welcomed and I was one of many who were caged out in the open at the pool parties. DJs play dance music the whole event, there are meet and greets in the hotel bar area, lots and lots of fucking... We've made friends we keep in touch with year round, hoping to see them at the next Splash we attend.
We've also gone to a traveling event called "Real Hotwives of <insert-city-name>" that comes through our city a couple times a year. It's a swanky party in a mansion with on-premise play areas, but only goes on for one evening and there's no themes or anything. Feels like a mild but sexy cocktail party in comparison to an event like Splash.
Our local swingers club has a handful of themed events that aren't specifically for but can be fun for hotwife couples, and we have a pretty big swing scene here with a fair number of single black men.
There's an event we haven't been to yet in Ohio called 2Tall, and a company called Yolo Entertainment throws a hotel party in West Palm Beach called Chocolate Factory that we've had our eyes on. This stuff isn't particularly difficult to find. They all advertise on most of the popular swinger sites.
