One of the fixtures in our household was we all had supper together. My wife was quite adamant about that. So our daughters grew up being accustomed to having intelligent conversation and being listened to.Both of them always did well academically and were pretty competitive in sports. So there was always something to discuss at supper. Even in the difficult 12 to 16 yo range the was always communication, sometimes a bit louder than I was accustomed to. For them normal was being addressed by their names and being listened to and respected. One of my daughters is a psychologist and in the first years of her practice she was appalled by how many young black women were OK with being called a "black bitch". Neither of my daughters would ever put up with it. However it seems to be more accepted today and not just in the black community and I find that unsettling