Husband doesn't seem interested in sex

BBW1977 said:
Lately, my 44 year old husband seems to have no interest in sex. He had surgery on his shoulder almost a year ago. He claims pain is the reason but it's been 11 months since the surgery. He does work kind of long hours but even after a 2-3 hour "nap" he is not energized for sex. We have had many kid free weekends and all we do is sit around. He used to say to me "find us someone to fuck." Not anymore. I am horny, all the time lately. There are some days all I can think about is a fat cock in my wet pussy and I even tell him straight up I am horny, yet he comes home, has dinner and promptly falls asleep on the couch. I thought maybe he was cheating but his routine has not changed, and his nephew now works with him so cheating would not be an option as they carpool together. I am frustrated and don't know what to do. I feel guilty asking to have a playdate instead of trying to entice him to fuck me but I am getting tired of always initiating things just to be turned down. I am too young to give sex up. I almost feel like cheating but I do not want the guilt. He is a good man. I just don't know how much more patience I can have for this situation.
Also, yes, I have talked to him about this, and he uses pain as his excuse or "You don't come to bed with me." He goes to bed very early and while that is true, there are many nights I go to bed with him, and nothing happens.
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Perhaps depression coupled with testosterone levels decreased. Men after the age of 40 begin the shed testosterone. My husband did. He noticed he was becoming lethargic, work out tires him more. He asked his friends if they had similar issues and one said yes and he had I his testosterone level checked and it was way down. My husband went to his doctor and had a hormone screen done and yep so was his. They put him on a supplement treatment and it cured the issue in a month. His sex drive was never low just tired and not feeling himself. Perhaps he needs to get his checked too?
 
BBW1977 said:
Lately, my 44 year old husband seems to have no interest in sex. He had surgery on his shoulder almost a year ago. He claims pain is the reason but it's been 11 months since the surgery. He does work kind of long hours but even after a 2-3 hour "nap" he is not energized for sex. We have had many kid free weekends and all we do is sit around. He used to say to me "find us someone to fuck." Not anymore. I am horny, all the time lately. There are some days all I can think about is a fat cock in my wet pussy and I even tell him straight up I am horny, yet he comes home, has dinner and promptly falls asleep on the couch. I thought maybe he was cheating but his routine has not changed, and his nephew now works with him so cheating would not be an option as they carpool together. I am frustrated and don't know what to do. I feel guilty asking to have a playdate instead of trying to entice him to fuck me but I am getting tired of always initiating things just to be turned down. I am too young to give sex up. I almost feel like cheating but I do not want the guilt. He is a good man. I just don't know how much more patience I can have for this situation.
Also, yes, I have talked to him about this, and he uses pain as his excuse or "You don't come to bed with me." He goes to bed very early and while that is true, there are many nights I go to bed with him, and nothing happens.
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Cheat him, film everything, photograph and tell him subtly. Maybe it rekindles the sex flame in him.
 
BBW1977 said:
Lately, my 44 year old husband seems to have no interest in sex. He had surgery on his shoulder almost a year ago. He claims pain is the reason but it's been 11 months since the surgery. He does work kind of long hours but even after a 2-3 hour "nap" he is not energized for sex. We have had many kid free weekends and all we do is sit around. He used to say to me "find us someone to fuck." Not anymore. I am horny, all the time lately. There are some days all I can think about is a fat cock in my wet pussy and I even tell him straight up I am horny, yet he comes home, has dinner and promptly falls asleep on the couch. I thought maybe he was cheating but his routine has not changed, and his nephew now works with him so cheating would not be an option as they carpool together. I am frustrated and don't know what to do. I feel guilty asking to have a playdate instead of trying to entice him to fuck me but I am getting tired of always initiating things just to be turned down. I am too young to give sex up. I almost feel like cheating but I do not want the guilt. He is a good man. I just don't know how much more patience I can have for this situation.
Also, yes, I have talked to him about this, and he uses pain as his excuse or "You don't come to bed with me." He goes to bed very early and while that is true, there are many nights I go to bed with him, and nothing happens.
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What is the update on your husband. There were some good advice that people had on here. Did you take some of them and talk to your husband???
 
BBW1977 said:
I am turning 45 tomorrow. He turns 45 in August
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Buy your self a bbc toy and have him watch it that doesn’t get him horny for him to fuck you then tell him that is what you need to have a new sexual experience with another man while he watches you cuming like never before.
 
Dan Teal said:
How many of these men with Low T and losing interest had vasectomies? Just curious?
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I had a vasectomy decades ago. It didn't lower my interest in sex at all. I could find no reports online linking "Low T and losing interest" with vasectomies. In fact, several urology clinics like this one claim "[a] vasectomy will not affect a man’s virility or his testosterone level."

Several anecdotal reports I've read over the years make the opposite claims; that freeing a man from the fear of getting a woman pregnant increases his sex drive.
 
BBW1977 said:
Lately, my 44 year old husband seems to have no interest in sex. He had surgery on his shoulder almost a year ago. He claims pain is the reason but it's been 11 months since the surgery. He does work kind of long hours but even after a 2-3 hour "nap" he is not energized for sex. We have had many kid free weekends and all we do is sit around. He used to say to me "find us someone to fuck." Not anymore. I am horny, all the time lately. There are some days all I can think about is a fat cock in my wet pussy and I even tell him straight up I am horny, yet he comes home, has dinner and promptly falls asleep on the couch. I thought maybe he was cheating but his routine has not changed, and his nephew now works with him so cheating would not be an option as they carpool together. I am frustrated and don't know what to do. I feel guilty asking to have a playdate instead of trying to entice him to fuck me but I am getting tired of always initiating things just to be turned down. I am too young to give sex up. I almost feel like cheating but I do not want the guilt. He is a good man. I just don't know how much more patience I can have for this situation.
Also, yes, I have talked to him about this, and he uses pain as his excuse or "You don't come to bed with me." He goes to bed very early and while that is true, there are many nights I go to bed with him, and nothing happens.
Click to expand...
Low testosterone
 
BBW1977 said:
Lately, my 44 year old husband seems to have no interest in sex. He had surgery on his shoulder almost a year ago. He claims pain is the reason but it's been 11 months since the surgery. He does work kind of long hours but even after a 2-3 hour "nap" he is not energized for sex. We have had many kid free weekends and all we do is sit around. He used to say to me "find us someone to fuck." Not anymore. I am horny, all the time lately. There are some days all I can think about is a fat cock in my wet pussy and I even tell him straight up I am horny, yet he comes home, has dinner and promptly falls asleep on the couch. I thought maybe he was cheating but his routine has not changed, and his nephew now works with him so cheating would not be an option as they carpool together. I am frustrated and don't know what to do. I feel guilty asking to have a playdate instead of trying to entice him to fuck me but I am getting tired of always initiating things just to be turned down. I am too young to give sex up. I almost feel like cheating but I do not want the guilt. He is a good man. I just don't know how much more patience I can have for this situation.
Also, yes, I have talked to him about this, and he uses pain as his excuse or "You don't come to bed with me." He goes to bed very early and while that is true, there are many nights I go to bed with him, and nothing happens.
Click to expand...
I'm always interested in sex
 
BBW1977 said:
Lately, my 44 year old husband seems to have no interest in sex. He had surgery on his shoulder almost a year ago. He claims pain is the reason but it's been 11 months since the surgery. He does work kind of long hours but even after a 2-3 hour "nap" he is not energized for sex. We have had many kid free weekends and all we do is sit around. He used to say to me "find us someone to fuck." Not anymore. I am horny, all the time lately. There are some days all I can think about is a fat cock in my wet pussy and I even tell him straight up I am horny, yet he comes home, has dinner and promptly falls asleep on the couch. I thought maybe he was cheating but his routine has not changed, and his nephew now works with him so cheating would not be an option as they carpool together. I am frustrated and don't know what to do. I feel guilty asking to have a playdate instead of trying to entice him to fuck me but I am getting tired of always initiating things just to be turned down. I am too young to give sex up. I almost feel like cheating but I do not want the guilt. He is a good man. I just don't know how much more patience I can have for this situation.
Also, yes, I have talked to him about this, and he uses pain as his excuse or "You don't come to bed with me." He goes to bed very early and while that is true, there are many nights I go to bed with him, and nothing happens.
Click to expand...
Sorry for hearing this. If she refuse to fuck you due to working so much hour you have one thing to do. Cheating. Try to have a ffm 3 some with a girl that he like. After that he must return the favor. So you will begin a new lifestyle with his approval. It is called brainwashing
 
zelvebbc said:
I would either tell him to go to the doctor and get ******* work done to check his testosterone levels and get him on testosterone replacement therapy and viagra lol! If he still not pounding your pussy straight up tell him. I love you I don’t want to change our situation but I need to have sex and want to start cuckolding you and fucking BBCs. Tell him you will film let him watch etc. to keep him in loop but you need sex.
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Unfortuantly for me it is my wife that has lost all intrest in sex. I know that it is not a help that I am super tiny and now have a serious case of ED which viagira and other meds have not helped so far. My Uroloigist has not been able to help me get a hard on for years and says he thinks my only chance is surgery but he can not promise it will not make things worse. I am not willing to take the chance. I offer to eat her pussy and I would love for a man perferably a Black man to seduce her and start to fuck her while I watch and when finished I would love to eat her cream pie if she was open to it.
 
Darkjumper said:
Something just came to mind, and while there could be a drastic drop in his testosterone, it's also possible he could be suffering from ED and not telling you. If it's the latter, him not telling you could just be due to shame and disappointment at feeling inadequate. You really need to be delicate with him, so please, approach with as much empathy as possible. You may have to be a bit creative. Wait till he is in the shower and just step in unless he locks the door. All I'm saying is fine ways to tease and tempt him when he is least expecting it. Again, good luck.
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Excellent advice here and on your other posts for this thread too.
 
Darkjumper said:
Yes it's easy to use this as a reason to cheat and I won't tell you what to do. But I will say, don't let your moral compass steer you off course. You got married for better or for worse, so if this a test of that vow, don't fail it. Give it your best shot and support him. I know he seems stubborn, but don't pressure him because it will only make him rebel. Don't offer ultimatums either, you are a woman, outsmart him. Figure a way to get him to get a check up, by getting him to suggest it on his own so he thinks it's his idea. I wish you all the best.
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Very respectful response right here. Kudos to you @Darkjumper
 
dalipps said:
Well thats why I'm in this situation, my husband lost interest , have a very difficult time getting an erection, and when he does, he either can't finish or get soft
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I am sorry that is the case though I can relate and it is part of the reason I think a lover would be wonderful for my wife, she deserves all the pleasure she can get.
 
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