Are you doing this for you, or for her?

We are doing it for both of us. In our case it was mainly hubbys idea at first, but I tried it and liked it. So we've carried on and off over last few years.
It's mainly the occasional 'special nights' now. But it's certainly spiced our sex lives up and we've mainly enjoyed every minute of it.
 
We haven't cross that line yet but we are a very solid couple who have been talking about it for a while now. Bringing the fantasy to reality is another step and std, trust and potential impacts on our family and relation are in discussion. We are doing this for both of us, the roleplay is definitly fun for us. Finding the right guy is another step.
 
cfanatsy said:
We haven't cross that line yet but we are a very solid couple who have been talking about it for a while now. Bringing the fantasy to reality is another step and std, trust and potential impacts on our family and relation are in discussion. We are doing this for both of us, the roleplay is definitly fun for us. Finding the right guy is another step.
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I really hope you give it a go, even if just once. It's a lot of sexy fun!
As for the things you mentioned it depends how often you play, if you do it once probably no one will ever know, continue playing and yes, people might work out or find out what you do. My family did, and it's all been fine. Good luck!
 
Ann4BBC said:
I really hope you give it a go, even if just once. It's a lot of sexy fun!
As for the things you mentioned it depends how often you play, if you do it once probably no one will ever know, continue playing and yes, people might work out or find out what you do. My family did, and it's all been fine. Good luck!
Click to expand...
How did it happened for you on your first time?
 
cfanatsy said:
How did it happened for you on your first time?
Click to expand...
Hubby wanted me to do it for some time, nagged me for years. I eventually said I would just go with 1 or 2 guys. I liked it so much, and hubby loved it, so I carried on.
My first guys me and hubby just went drinking in a city centre pub and I got talking to guys. I met a nice guy, luckily, and went back to his place while hubby waited.
Think we were lucky though, if I was starting again I would meet guys off the net. I have had some success with another site which I use. X
 
lisasparrows said:
Please don't throw out pics of airbrushed 18 year old girls receiving 12 inch cocks.
I really want to see if there is intelligent life on this site.
And if it's just for you, it would be nice to know.
I really would love more sex, but my marriage will always come first.
Click to expand...

I think from reading many posts from couples who started out as swingers or who decided to add a third person to their bed that in those cases it's about both of them. But in other cases it appears it's about him.

There are so many posts on this site that are from a man who says " my wife/gf deserves BBC. Please help me convince her." These are guys who got hooked on IR porn and now want to see it up close. They're convinced that only black men can please their women- not that they've ever bothered considering that their wife/gf might actually be happy the way things are.

I know people are going to flame me or tell me I don't know what I'm talking about and tell me to go away- you should read some of the private messages I get- I firmly believe if you need to convince her; if you need to work on her over a period of time to change her mind; if you're soliciting advice from others to help you get her in bed with a black man then it's about you and NOT her.

You can talk all you want that you just want to experience the pleasure that you're incapable of giving her but it's really all about you.

OK- flame away.
 
I never had to talk Lo into anything. Just talk in bed until we found out we have matching kinks(she's a slut and I like to watch). The only thing I had to convince her was that I was really ok with her actually doing it, she was very worried about ruining our relationship. She decided she prefered black guys and I agreed they tend to be the best show for me so it's all good. She's commited to me and would stop any time I ask, I love her and never make her do anything she doesn't want (which takes a bit of figuring since she is very submissive and likes the sex slave thing).
 
Ann4BBC said:
We are doing it for both of us. In our case it was mainly hubbys idea at first, but I tried it and liked it. So we've carried on and off over last few years.
It's mainly the occasional 'special nights' now. But it's certainly spiced our sex lives up and we've mainly enjoyed every minute of it.
Click to expand...

I'm happy for you that it's not a one sided thing. Communication is key.
 
enjoynlife said:
Hi - this is the hubby half of enjoynlife.

The cuckoling lifestyle describes my sexual identity - it has just been over 3 years since I finally came "out" to my wife and openly shared my sexual desires.

I would say we are doing this together for us. It really has strengthened our marriage and opened us to better communication - if your husband is willing to discuss his sexual inadequacies and desire for you to take lover he will not be worried about anything else!
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I wouldn't want him to have to talk about his inadequacies. I would be filled with guilt. I was thinking more on the lines of him telling me he hates pro porn because it's so boring. Then maybe he could tell me that I would be really good at being in porn movies. Then just kind of go from there. :)
 
cfanatsy said:
We haven't cross that line yet but we are a very solid couple who have been talking about it for a while now. Bringing the fantasy to reality is another step and std, trust and potential impacts on our family and relation are in discussion. We are doing this for both of us, the roleplay is definitly fun for us. Finding the right guy is another step.
Click to expand...

I read a story where the husband met the bulls on his own. (I'm talking about the first meet)
If the bull wasn't willing to do that, it spoke volumes.
 
JerseyGirl said:
I think from reading many posts from couples who started out as swingers or who decided to add a third person to their bed that in those cases it's about both of them. But in other cases it appears it's about him.

There are so many posts on this site that are from a man who says " my wife/gf deserves BBC. Please help me convince her." These are guys who got hooked on IR porn and now want to see it up close. They're convinced that only black men can please their women- not that they've ever bothered considering that their wife/gf might actually be happy the way things are.

I know people are going to flame me or tell me I don't know what I'm talking about an,d tell me to go away- you should read some of the private messages I get- I firmly believe if you need to convince her; if you need to work on her over a period of time to change her mind; if you're soliciting advice from others to help you get her in bed with a black man then it's about you and NOT her.

You can talk all you want that you just want to experience the pleasure that you're incapable of giving her but it's really all about you.

OK- flame away.
Click to expand...

No flaming here. Thanks for your thoughtful answer. If a guy on here is just doing it for himself, then that's the answer I want from him. And if it's for her, that's still a good answer. I could never do this unless it was for both of us. But's that's where the hard part comes in. How to really be sure who's doing what for whom.

This is going to sound really crazy, but I've given guys advice about how to go about this. I think the guy should stop with the interracial mfm porn, and stick with white on white fmf porn. Will the wife like this? No, but she will understand it. It would be very natural for the wife to then ask him: "OK, so if you get it your way, do I then get two have it with two guys?" Then hubby could stutter and stammer and act confused. He wasn't expecting that. Then hubby could say: "I guess that would seem fair, but I would need more time to think about it."

Then just let it simmer over a period of time. Then hubby could surprise her by saying, "Yes. I think I'd be OK with it. Let's throw up a profile on a naughty website and see what happens." The lady will get 19,000 willing bulls, and the guy might get one lady. But that would be just fine, because that's what they BOTH want. :)
 
Roach said:
I never had to talk Lo into anything. Just talk in bed until we found out we have matching kinks(she's a slut and I like to watch). The only thing I had to convince her was that I was really ok with her actually doing it, she was very worried about ruining our relationship. She decided she prefered black guys and I agreed they tend to be the best show for me so it's all good. She's commited to me and would stop any time I ask, I love her and never make her do anything she doesn't want (which takes a bit of figuring since she is very submissive and likes the sex slave thing).
Click to expand...

Sounds like you both hit the jackpot. You get what you want and she gets what she wants. And it's smart to not push the black cock idea. Let that happen later. Make it be kind of a curious experiment. If she asks you later what you thought, just say I never thought that the skin contrast would turn me on, but it did. We should do this again some time.
 
Maybe I wasn't clear she is the one who decided she prefers black cock. I just enjoy the show. I took the pic In the avatar on a fun evening. Lo's step sister said we were soul mates when she heard the situation.
 
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