Very conservative wife makes BBC comments watching mainstream/hollywood movies with IR theme

[ravi1990]

Bit of context:
- Male/female couple in our mid-30's been married for 12 years
- Wife is very conservative, never had a relationship with another guy before marriage, let alone sex
- Before marriage she used to listen to a lot of black hip hop artists
- We're sexually active (have sex most nights of the week) and she gets extremely turned on giving me oral and making comments about my huge c*ock (I'm average about 6")
- Have watched porn together in the past, sometimes interracial porn where the male has a huge c*ck

I've noticed recently that almost every time we watch a mainstream hollywood movie together that involves a while female actress falling for / getting into a relationship with a black male actor, my wife will make a comment like "oh she wants that big black dick" or "she's going for the big black cock". She'll make these comments even if there's only hugging/kissing involved in the scene and no explicit sex. In the beginning she'd make these comments infrequently, but now she'll make them almost every time there's an interracial theme in the movie. I can vivdly remember two separate occasions. In these films the while female cheats on her partner with a black male. Again there's no explicit content. But my wife was so fixated on the scene (and visually very turned on) that she got quite sweaty!

For some weird reason I find this a massive turn on to the point I usually get a really hard erection and we have the most intense sex ever! At first I thought her comments about BBC may have something to do with the interracial porn scenes we watched together in the past. But now I'm convinced that she's always had a thing for black guys. I think she won't admit the fact that she's into black guys as it might hurt my feelings, i.e., the whole BBC thing.

How do I get her to come out of her shell and admit that she finds black guys attractive and is turned on by BBC? We're quite adventurous sexually in the sense that we've used sex toys in the past - a vibrator for her and a fleshlight for me. But she's never used a dildo before. I think she'd love to experience a BBC dildo but again is afraid to ask in case it'll hurt my ego. How do I get her to come round to the live out the fantasy?

 

[Acorn]

The first thing I would suggest is to casually acknowledge that all women are curious about black men. Make it the default and allow her to argue against that point of view. If she says thats not true and argues she has no interest then you'll have a starting point.

I think the key is to not make her feel weird for having those thoughts, let her feel like it would be totally normal for her to feel that way.

 

[shady311]

My wife does similar things during movies, we don’t watch porn together. But also things like when my buddy got divorced and his ex posted pics with her black BF & would say things like, well I guess this makes sense now.

 

[watcher6019]

I would think they easy to thing to try would be for you to buy her a black vibrator. I don't think I would get a full-on black dildo right off. See how she responds to that, and then go from there. With my wife I started using a large flexible neck massager, telling it was her white ex-boyfriend Lance, who she said had a massive dick. Good name for him, huh? From there, I started telling her it was a big black stud, and it just progressed from there. She never id admit to being attracted to blacks, but she always came hard and quick when I used that scenario. It took over 10 years, but eventually she did screw a black man, twice.

 

[EvilynQOS]

I'll just say the obvious, she's watching Big Black Cock porn when you aren't around, the best way to break the ice is to buy some interracial porn or pull up a scene and show her, without any prompt or comment beforehand, and as her once she's watching "what do you think about that?" the question is, what scene....

 

[Debman]

Next time your wife suggests the woman just "wants the big black cock", challenge her on how she thinks the black man has a big cock? Ask her if she has an interest in finding out? Is she attracted to black men and/or BBC? etc etc...get her to talk about her feelings.

My wife is also very conservative and used to believe that plain vanilla sex was all there was. We worked on her opening up about her feelings and she eventually agreed to broaden her perspective and explore her sexuality. It took a lot of patience and time, but it was the best thing we ever did together.

 

[ravi1990]

I'll just say the obvious, she's watching Big Black Cock porn when you aren't around, the best way to break the ice is to buy some interracial porn or pull up a scene and show her, without any prompt or comment beforehand, and as her once she's watching "what do you think about that?" the question is, what scene....

I think you might be right. I suspected that she might've been watching BBC porn behind my back too. I checked her internet history on her phone but nothing there (I think she's been deleting it). However, when I type 'big' into her phone keypad 'black' follows stright after. Obviously the predicted text has remembered her typing those two words in succession. But 'cock' or 'dick' isn't in her list of remembered words. Again I suspect she's been deleting those.

 

[EvilynQOS]

I think you might be right. I suspected that she might've been watching BBC porn behind my back too. I checked her internet history on her phone but nothing there (I think she's been deleting it). However, when I type 'big' into her phone keypad 'black' follows stright after. Obviously the predicted text has remembered her typing those two words in succession. But 'cock' or 'dick' isn't in her list of remembered words. Again I suspect she's been deleting those.

simply show her an outrageous Interracial fuck scene, make sure that a precum dripping black cock next to a white face is the first frame she sees and let her soak it in, if she stays silent for a minute, ask her, "do you like that?" and then say "I do, want to keep watching together?"

 

[ravi1990]

simply show her an outrageous Interracial fuck scene, make sure that a precum dripping black cock next to a white face is the first frame she sees and let her soak it in, if she stays silent for a minute, ask her, "do you like that?" and then say "I do, want to keep watching together?"

I've tried this before. But she's too conservative to outright admit that shes turned on by BBC. She wouldn't admit that she's interested in a c*ck bigger than mine. Once when watching BBC porn I asked her "do you think she's enjoying it" as in if she thinks the white female pornstar is enjoynig the BBC to which she replied "she's loving it". May be that was her hint to me that if she was on the receiving end of that BBC she'd love it.

 

[ravi1990]

The first thing I would suggest is to casually acknowledge that all women are curious about black men. Make it the default and allow her to argue against that point of view. If she says thats not true and argues she has no interest then you'll have a starting point.

I think the key is to not make her feel weird for having those thoughts, let her feel like it would be totally normal for her to feel that way.

Thanks for your reply. But how do I get that convo going? I've asked her if she's got any celebrity crushes hoping that she'll mention a black male celebrity.

 

[ravi1990]

Next time your wife suggests the woman just "wants the big black cock", challenge her on how she thinks the black man has a big cock? Ask her if she has an interest in finding out? Is she attracted to black men and/or BBC? etc etc...get her to talk about her feelings.

My wife is also very conservative and used to believe that plain vanilla sex was all there was. We worked on her opening up about her feelings and she eventually agreed to broaden her perspective and explore her sexuality. It took a lot of patience and time, but it was the best thing we ever did together.

I've actually did this very thing. I once challenged her "how'd you know he's got a big one" to which she replied "it's quite well known that black guys have biggest dicks, no?". I'm going to be honest I was pretty shocked when my conservative wife said this so I replied "oh it's well known that's a myth, you don't really believe that did you?" I could tell she was adamant that she wanted to prove (perhaps to herself) that she was right and that I was wrong. So she took out her phone and said "let's google this". She googled: 'is it true that black guys have the biggest dicks?' And low and behold the first hit in Google was a f*cking Quora Digest reply to that very question. The reply went along the lines of: I'm a 20-something Latina and I've had sex with X white guys and Y black guys and can confirm that the black men I've slept with were generally bigger. And the biggest one was a black guy. She was like "see, i told you!".

 

[ravi1990]

I would think they easy to thing to try would be for you to buy her a black vibrator. I don't think I would get a full-on black dildo right off. See how she responds to that, and then go from there. With my wife I started using a large flexible neck massager, telling it was her white ex-boyfriend Lance, who she said had a massive dick. Good name for him, huh? From there, I started telling her it was a big black stud, and it just progressed from there. She never id admit to being attracted to blacks, but she always came hard and quick when I used that scenario. It took over 10 years, but eventually she did screw a black man, twice.

recently I've been fingering her and making her go down on me at the same time (trying to simulate a spit-roasting MMF threesome) and this has made her cum very hard. If i was to surprise her with a black dildo and say lets try this instead of my finger do you think this would be a bad idea?

 

[Sexmex77]

Since you guys have a very active sexual life, I would suggest that you tell her straight up that you want to try something new and bring a dildo into play. I wouldn't go total BBC to begin with, but one that's slightly larger than you and a shade or two darker than you and star playing with it. That can allow you to role-playing different scenarios including blind folding her that will heighten her other senses. As you guys get more.confortable with it, you can either surprise her with a BBC one or buy it together.... you guys might even name the BBC, who knows?

 

[ravi1990]

Since you guys have a very active sexual life, I would suggest that you tell her straight up that you want to try something new and bring a dildo into play. I wouldn't go total BBC to begin with, but one that's slightly larger than you and a shade or two darker than you and star playing with it. That can allow you to role-playing different scenarios including blind folding her that will heighten her other senses. As you guys get more.confortable with it, you can either surprise her with a BBC one or buy it together.... you guys might even name the BBC, who knows?

this sounds like a plan! and I think would be the most realistic way to get her to open up about her fantasies. thanks

 

[Sexmex77]

It will also give you a chance for you to open up about yours... she might not open up because of you, she doesn't want to hurt you or doesn't know how you'll react. If you play it out and afterwards, you let her know much you liked it, she'll feel more comfortable sharing her thoughts with you. Good luck, and please, keep us posted

 

[watcher6019]

recently I've been fingering her and making her go down on me at the same time (trying to simulate a spit-roasting MMF threesome) and this has made her cum very hard. If i was to surprise her with a black dildo and say lets try this instead of my finger do you think this would be a bad idea?

It may be fine, but I think I would start with something Black that isn't a full-on fake penis.

 

[Pillowispa]

Does she like you talking dirty when you're having sex (before anyone asks, yes, I do)? My husband will indulge me with fantasy talk involving me getting into a situation where I get seduced by a black man/men. It really turns me on.
For instance, "imagine we're renting a house and we fall behind on the payments. The landlord pays a visit and says he needs payment within the week. Then he looks over at you and says, 'Or she can suck me dry and I'll give you till next month's due". He's over 6feet, muscular, black, and good looking. I'm shocked but when I look over at you you're licking your lips and looking him up and down..."
You get the idea. If it's you telling her what she's doing then maybe she'll be more likely to feel at ease.
If you do think you'll try this I would advise you not to use anyone you may know as the owner of the BBC; she wouldn't want you to think she has thoughts like that about them. Also, make the seduction process as realistic as possible, making her decisions seem like decisions she may really make if she was in that scenario; the best fantasies are those that are easier to believe could really happen.

 

[Debman]

Does she like you talking dirty when you're having sex (before anyone asks, yes, I do)? My husband will indulge me with fantasy talk involving me getting into a situation where I get seduced by a black man/men. It really turns me on.
For instance, "imagine we're renting a house and we fall behind on the payments. The landlord pays a visit and says he needs payment within the week. Then he looks over at you and says, 'Or she can suck me dry and I'll give you till next month's due". He's over 6feet, muscular, black, and good looking. I'm shocked but when I look over at you you're licking your lips and looking him up and down..."
You get the idea. If it's you telling her what she's doing then maybe she'll be more likely to feel at ease.
If you do think you'll try this I would advise you not to use anyone you may know as the owner of the BBC; she wouldn't want you to think she has thoughts like that about them. Also, make the seduction process as realistic as possible, making her decisions seem like decisions she may really make if she was in that scenario; the best fantasies are those that are easier to believe could really happen.

I only wish more women would offer input such as yourself. It is refreshing and titilating!

 

[mywayintermsofsex]

Does she like you talking dirty when you're having sex (before anyone asks, yes, I do)? My husband will indulge me with fantasy talk involving me getting into a situation where I get seduced by a black man/men. It really turns me on.
For instance, "imagine we're renting a house and we fall behind on the payments. The landlord pays a visit and says he needs payment within the week. Then he looks over at you and says, 'Or she can suck me dry and I'll give you till next month's due". He's over 6feet, muscular, black, and good looking. I'm shocked but when I look over at you you're licking your lips and looking him up and down..."
You get the idea. If it's you telling her what she's doing then maybe she'll be more likely to feel at ease.
If you do think you'll try this I would advise you not to use anyone you may know as the owner of the BBC; she wouldn't want you to think she has thoughts like that about them. Also, make the seduction process as realistic as possible, making her decisions seem like decisions she may really make if she was in that scenario; the best fantasies are those that are easier to believe could really happen.

Good advice.

(...) I would advise you not to use anyone you may know (...)

...but it is fair to include her Black celebrity crush in your fantasies.

Also i'd like to add: don't use cheating or revenge scenarios! Those themes are a turn-on for some folks as their "private" fantasy but as a couple when you have sex with each other i would not recommend bringing up anything that has a potential to put your relationship at risk if it was real, even if it is but a fantasy for now. Stuff like that makes many partners feel uncomfortable which is the opposite of what should be the goal. Make her feel comfortable and sexy!

i would not recommend anything too specialized for a start. When you first introduce pillow/dirty talk to your sex life, try to keep it basic at first. An example would be the wife/girlfriend being seduced by a stranger in a bar or dance club. The guy would ideally have features the wife/GF is known to be attracted to, the story line could progress with him asking for a dance, and while close dancing to a soft song her feeling one of his hands move down to grap her a$$ cheek, then her feeling a growing bulge in his trousers against her body/crotch, etc. She may be surprised by her husband/BF bringing up a fantasy that involves another man but her reaction can positively be used to compliment her and remind her of her sexiness. "C'mon, you are a good-looking, hot woman! Any man who is not attracted to you must be either gay or blind."

Also involving another man in a fantasy as a third in a threesome scenario seems more acceptable as it means somebody added to the couple having sex instead of her having sex with somebody else. This fantasy scenario can also easily be supported by the husband/BF using one or two fingers in order to "simulate" another man's dick in addition to his own which will make the fantasy role play better feelable and more believable. Subsequently it is easy to replace the finger(s) with a toy, a penis-like dildo with a realistic look, touch and feel in the right color.

Try to open her mind to sexual fantasies (and talking about them!) not only by bringing up you own but, more importantly, by including hers as well. She will be more accepting of your fantasies when she sees hers being accepted too.

Specialize and improve your fantasy roleplay gradually instead of bringing up the most specialized fantasy of yours in the very beginning. It is easier and feels more natural of a progression if you don't come up with, say, an all-black gangbang of her alone in a pub with a mostly black audience. Instead... If you have successfully introduced the idea of a threesome situation with an "arbitrary" third male stranger, it will be only a small step to have that third player be a Black man in one of your play sessions. If you have successfully introduced a threesome scenario, it will be only a step to introduce a fourth player. If that makes her feel uncomfortable, it will be rather easy to get back to the threesome with "minor" changes, say, the husband/BF sitting back watching the wife/GF having sex with the previously introduced third and forth players. "Would I really want that? Well I have sort of a voyeuristic mind/inclination. Plus I love to witness you receive pleasure. Yep, I am pretty sure I'd do that. At least sometimes. For a greater diversity of fun."

Be sexually open-minded, playful and playful together! Have fun!

 

[one2submit]

recently I've been fingering her and making her go down on me at the same time (trying to simulate a spit-roasting MMF threesome) and this has made her cum very hard. If i was to surprise her with a black dildo and say lets try this instead of my finger do you think this would be a bad idea?

I had a girlfriend respond exceptionally well to that very thing. I was using her dildo to fuck her then crawled up beside her head to feed her my dick at the same time. She went crazy sucking me good. She gave herself away about two cocks turning her on very much.