How old were you when you realised you were/wanted to be a cuck?

I was about 28. We had been married for about 3 years and had just moved into our house. I was going through some boxes and I found a journal that my wife kept while we were dating. Basically-she was fucking a lab partner for a semester or so. There were times where she fucked him an hour before I showed up. I remembered there was a time when I slipped into her feeling her extremely wet-though at the time I didn’t think anything of it as she would drip wet naturally. I fucked her that evening standing up in front of her window and told her “Damn babe you are so fuckin wet”. As I read her journal I felt a lump in my throat and a lump in my shorts. That was the first time that this crept in my head.
 
Definitely did not happen over night. If someone told me in my early 20s that future you would get off watching your wife getting fucked by black guys I don't think I would have believed them. Started having hotwife/swinging fantasies in mid late 20s when I was dating my now wife. We would read Penthouse letters with many having hotwife themes. We started talking about maybe swinging but my wife was never into other woman or watching me with women. Then in early 30's she fucked a white friend with my consent and although jealous at the time there was no looking back. Early interracial websites like Dark Cavern got us fantasizing about her with black men. She met a black bartender when we were on vacation and ended up bringing him back to our hotel and fucking him with me watching. That was years ago and she has been exclusively with black men as a hotwife ever since.
Dark Cavern was an entry point for many people and couples.
 
I was turned on by interracial porn beginning at the age of about 12! I was always attracted to the sight and thought of watching a big black man fuck a white woman while I was present! I asked my first wife to try it but she wouldn’t. Finally, this year at the age of 46 and thanks to the love of my life, my precious Wife and Queen, I have become a full fledged cuck! We have had three different lovers and about 5 encounters since April of this year, and we both have enjoyed them very much!!
 
I was bullied by girls starting when i was 12 who bragged about their grown athletic boyfriends....was already looking at porn by then so there was barely any chance. That helped me realize i was not monogamous to begin with. Learned the word "cuckold" freshman year of high school cause it's a Shakespearean word. This also during the height of DMX and 50 cent being portrayed as pinnacles of masculinity...when i turned 18 I found Darkcavern AND also discovered Ronnie Coleman and that pushed white bulls out of my mind - and started my addiction to jerking off which put me on the rode to further inadequacy.
 
I accepted it after puberty and seeing my friend's much larger cocks in person. At 13 or 14 I noticed that I loved watching women get so much pleasure from massive cocks in porn especially from a BBC. During my first relationship when I was 18 I realized my small cock had troubles making her cum at all. Because of this she would always tell me her other sex stories and tell me how to make her cum like other guys she's fucked like her black friend. We end up breaking up and I found out she was fucking her black friend the entire time we were together. Upon me finding out I was mad initially but then turned on. So I searched BBC cuckold porn and fell in love with the fetish and haven't looked back since.
 
Early teens around 14/15y my then girlfriend loved black guys I saw her several times making out and getting fealed up I would always get boners and jerk off to her images. We eventually grew apart, but even today I sometimes think and wonder who she is Cuckolding she was,is a natural cuckolddres for sure
 
It was high school for me. I got extremely turned on by experimenting sharing my girlfriend with my best friend. The experience was filled with all kinds of emotions and raging hormones. She really loved being with two guys and being different from the other girls and couples. There was no humiliation or cuckold involved although I let them date several times alone and the waiting and jealousy was excrutiatingly exciting!

It wasn't until years later with my second wife that we got into interacial sex. We started out as swingers but it became clear she prefered to have our kinky sex with black guys and I couldn't have agreed or been turned on more. I almost always finish with sloppy seconds.
 
I'm still connecting the dots, but it wasn't until the last few years where I realized it is something I find really exciting and enjoyable with my wife. Before that I was super jealous and would have never dreamed of sharing my gf / wife with another guy. I'm more into stag / vixen than cuck, but it's fluid.

But I can remember back to high school waiting for class to start and I overheard two girls sitting in front / next to me talking to each other. They were talking about blowing their boyfriends (also guys I knew) and then trying to kiss them after they nutted in their mouths and watching them skirm. They were talking so casually about it and giggling like it was no big deal. Thinking about it now, at least one of them absolutely knew I was listening because she turned to me and asked if it turned me on listening to them and how she thought I would enjoy it. I was embarrassed and pretended I wasn't listening / didn't hear them, but I had hardest erection of my life. Now I imagine that was my wife talking to me like that after a hot date and telling me all about it.
 
I have never written publicly about this, nor ever shared it even with my ex wife, but I have told a couple of folks on this site. In college I dated a girl and after several months I convinced her to have sex. I was actually her first. She loved it and we had a great sex which she often instigated. The girl was 2 years younger. After we came back from the Christmas break, her suitemate (The dorm rooms shared a common bath) started dating a black student. My GF always had a room to herself - her initial roommate left school and the suitemate's roommate joined a sorority and moved into their house leaving both girls with rooms of their own.

That simply meant we could often stay together in her room which was awesome. As I mentioned the suitemate (Angie) was just beautiful. My GF was very attractive but Angie with her blonde hair and brown eyes could have been a model! I recall saying something about Angie dating a black guy but my GF said they were merely good friends. I never bought that but didn't press it.

Then one morning, I had stayed with my GF and got up to use the bathroom. When I opened the door there was the guy. He was standing buck naked at the toilet peeing and I was sort of frozen. He had at least an 8 or 9" cock. I was going to make a hasty retreat but I happened to look over, the bed being directly across from the doorway, and there was Angie in bed. Naked as well!

If I thought she was gorgeous before, damn, she was spectacular and as much as I should have immediately jumped back out of the bathroom and made my hasty retreat I was totally frozen in place. Here was the black guy sporting this huge cock and Angie in the next room not more than ten to fifteen feet away. But it was the wet puddle on the sheet between her legs that was frozen in my head!

To this day, I will never forget the smile she had on her face as my eyes traveled from her pussy to her eyes. I mumbled something about being sorry and shut the door. Then went back over to my GF's bed and snuggled up beside her nude body, I'm sure with the biggest erection of my life.

After that morning, Angie and the guy made no secret around me of their relationship. They would kiss in front of me and she always had this smile like I know what you saw. But I never said anything to my GF about it.

Okay - not long after that, there seemed to be a change in my relationship with Sandy (Not using her real name - not sure why as it doesnt matter but won't). Sandy loved to have sex with me but it seemed to taper off. After we got back from a date - dinner, movies, bar - she seemed to make some excuse why I couldn't come up and stay. It could be her period or she didn't feel good, etc. The last month or so - maybe a hand job but fucking her just didn't happen.

And then it just sort of happened that we split. I had met up with a girl and we had a quickie and I just sort of moved on. Sandy too seemed to move on. We stayed friendly - just not involved anymore.

It was about 10 years later after graduation, that I ran into a girl who had been in that same dorm and knew my ex GF. We were at a tailgate at a different school and she said she had gone to my college and stayed in that dorm. I asked if she knew Sandy. Thats when she said "Did I?" Then she went on to talk about how she and her roommate (they had been suitemates but apparently after me they moved in together) had dated this black guy. They were all the time getting in trouble with the RA (Resident Advisor) because they would bring black guys in after hours that stayed the night.

Thats when the girl said she even had a Boyfriend who had no idea she and her roommate were fucking this guy at the same time. I still wonder if she could tell anything by the look on my face - I was the guy. It all made sense now.

At first I was embarrassed, pissed, humiliated thinking this guy was fucking his GF and mine. I was taking her out and then brining her home to him to fuck. Likely all three of them in bed together! I wondered when I did pick her up and she was late meeting me, when I kissed her, had she just been with him?

While initially it had depressed me when I heard about it - then I found myself jacking off to the thoughts of him with Sandy and maybe all three of them together. I suppose thats not being a cuck in the true sense, I didnt know I was being cucked. But I cannot tell you the number of times I have jacked off thinking about it. The girl had said they brought "Black guys" in after hours. All I could think about was Sandy with him and several of his buddies...Angie and Sandy ... I can't tell you all the variations! I had been her first but #2, #3 possible lots more - all black.

Like quite a few white guys on this site - the more I thought about it - the more obsessed I became. I finally did get a chance to act on some of my impulses last year with another couple. Unfortunately, my GF now (Im divorced) is pretty conservative. I would love though to have a true cuck relationship. I do love this site and love reading about other people's exp. Sorry for the very long response but I finally got the courage to share.
 
I was 21 and my high school sweetheart and I got in a fight and she ended up sleeping with another guy. Like over a weekend.

Like always we got back together and she made a big deal out of the fact she had something to confess. When she told me I knew I should be mad but I was really turned on. That was the spark that caught fire.
 
It was high school for me. I got extremely turned on by experimenting sharing my girlfriend with my best friend. The experience was filled with all kinds of emotions and raging hormones. She really loved being with two guys and being different from the other girls and couples. There was no humiliation or cuckold involved although I let them date several times alone and the waiting and jealousy was excrutiatingly exciting!

It wasn't until years later with my second wife that we got into interacial sex. We started out as swingers but it became clear she prefered to have our kinky sex with black guys and I couldn't have agreed or been turned on more. I almost always finish with sloppy seconds.
Sloppy seconds are the best
 
I was 21 and my high school sweetheart and I got in a fight and she ended up sleeping with another guy. Like over a weekend.

Like always we got back together and she made a big deal out of the fact she had something to confess. When she told me I knew I should be mad but I was really turned on. That was the spark that caught fire.
Exact same thing happened to me. My high school gf left me for two months but then wanted to get back together.
 
Had my first thoughts of it at 15, and was definitely jerking to the thought of it by 17. What's crazy is i had no idea what cuckolding was, or that this was a genre. I saw porn prior, and surely some interracial, so what I desired was just from 'vanilla' interracial, no cuck themes. It's crazy to think though the first thoughts of it in my head were imagining my crush/HS sweet heart calling me up on video chat and fucking a black guy for me to watch, or being physically present and kissing her feet during. It's wild cause i had no frame of reference knowing that's a part of it, kissing a girl's feet, and it happens to be a cuckolding theme
 
Especially reading penthouse letters.
Those were the best. We would read them in a mixed group. I would make fun of the cucks because I couldn't admit to myself that I wanted to be one. It seems I waited too long before both acknowledging and accepting that desire to achieve it.
 
While we were dating my wife was sexually active with others. One night we were in a bar and she recognized a guy she knew, and went over to say hi and playfully slapped him. I asked who he was, and she said, "His name is Dietrich...Just a guy who fucked me a few times....he has a really big cock." Then she held up her forarm and grabbed her wrist indicating his girth. A lot of guys might be inclined to get on down the road from a chick like that, but not me. It was a serious turn on.
 
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