i've gone thru this, but for me it started with sort of crossdressing, when i was a teen i put some silk stockings on and my dick got so hard, also at a very young age i would get hard walking through the lingerie section of department stores. after a lingerie model gf moved out of my place, she left alot of stuff behind, i also have small feet, i really got into it & i started watching IR porn online, became addickted to it & was so hot & hungry for the huge Black COCKS!!! eventually i met a married Black Dom Bull Master online who thought i had a hot ass & very sexy legs. we eventually met at a secluded parking lot but my legs had to be shaven smooth & i had to be wearng garter belt, stockings, panties, high heels in the car & i would go down on his big thick beautiful Black cock & he forcibly trained me to deep throught. all the while verbally degrading & humiliating me. i became his steady paked car blowjob bitch & we met a few times at a motel where i got fully made up in my lingerie along with heavy make up & blonde bimbo wig. after he face fucked me , He anally raped my hot tight ass deep & hard, it hurt really bad but it was so hot how he used & dominated me & made me feel like a helpless little girl being raped , we met there several times & whenever he wanted to use me i would come running to him! i did all this while living a normal heterosexual lifestyle, witha gf & then marriage. you would not know this from looking at me. i'm very masculine in looks & manner, handsome & am still attracted to (HOT) women!