This Lifestyle is a Different Lifestyle

[jeff & christy]

Most people, even people "in the lifestyle" or privy to candid discussion about the lifestyle, do not realize that there is a lot about this lifestyle that is different than the lives vanilla people lead.

When you have one male you are married to but another man that you have had sex with more than once - especially if you have entered into a relationship with this man, it can be quite difficult and demanding. These men call, expecting and wanting what this relationship calls for, what their expectations require, all while balancing responsibilities to husband, career, children, family, very vanilla friends, and even neighbors. All the while, this man or men are calling or even just showing up, wanting what they want and have come to believe, rightly or wrongly, they have a right to expect. And, as relationships with these men deepens, these expectations and these rights, well perceived or not, expand over time.

And, since these relationships are "relationships," they become interwoven with other relationships, no matter how hard you work at discretion. You can divorce a husband, break up with a boyfriend, etc. There is no legal or socially acceptable mechanism for ending a relationship with a bull. It all has to be done through negotiation with involved parties and "non-involved" parties - all while juggling all your other responsibilities.

No one really understands this except possibly the few people directly involved - the wife, the bull and maybe the husband. No one knows what truly goes on behind someone's closed bedroom door - particularly if you have accepted another man into your marriage.

 

[mr_exquisite7]

Well said

 

[dickhurtz472]

Most people, even people "in the lifestyle" or privy to candid discussion about the lifestyle, do not realize that there is a lot about this lifestyle that is different than the lives vanilla people lead.

When you have one male you are married tom but another man that you have had sex with more than once - especially if you have entered into a relationship with this man, it can be quite difficult and demanding. These men call, expecting and wanting what this relationship calls for, what their expectations require, all while balancing responsibilities to husband, career, children, family, very vanilla friends, and even neighbors. All the while, this man or men are calling or even just showing up, wanting what they want and have come to believe, rightly or wrongly, they have a right to expect. And, as relationships with these men deepens, these expectations and these rights, well perceived or not, expand over time.

And, since these relationships are "relationships," they become interwoven with other relationships, no matter how hard you work at discretion. You can divorce a husband, break up with a boyfriend, etc. There is no legal or socially acceptable mechanism for ending a relationship with a bull. It all has to be done through negotiation with involved parties and "non-involved" parties - all while juggling all your other responsibilities.

No one really understands this except possibly the few people directly involved - the wife, the bull and maybe the husband. No one knows what truly goes on behind someone's closed bedroom door - particularly if you have accepted another man into your marriage.

 

[Armor31]

Most people, even people "in the lifestyle" or privy to candid discussion about the lifestyle, do not realize that there is a lot about this lifestyle that is different than the lives vanilla people lead.

When you have one male you are married tom but another man that you have had sex with more than once - especially if you have entered into a relationship with this man, it can be quite difficult and demanding. These men call, expecting and wanting what this relationship calls for, what their expectations require, all while balancing responsibilities to husband, career, children, family, very vanilla friends, and even neighbors. All the while, this man or men are calling or even just showing up, wanting what they want and have come to believe, rightly or wrongly, they have a right to expect. And, as relationships with these men deepens, these expectations and these rights, well perceived or not, expand over time.

And, since these relationships are "relationships," they become interwoven with other relationships, no matter how hard you work at discretion. You can divorce a husband, break up with a boyfriend, etc. There is no legal or socially acceptable mechanism for ending a relationship with a bull. It all has to be done through negotiation with involved parties and "non-involved" parties - all while juggling all your other responsibilities.

No one really understands this except possibly the few people directly involved - the wife, the bull and maybe the husband. No one knows what truly goes on behind someone's closed bedroom door - particularly if you have accepted another man into your marriage.

Christy I have read other post you have up and I really respect your knowledge and opinion.

 

[Allison2u]

This is so true. You said it best!

 

[ebenelibertin]

Most people, even people "in the lifestyle" or privy to candid discussion about the lifestyle, do not realize that there is a lot about this lifestyle that is different than the lives vanilla people lead.

When you have one male you are married tom but another man that you have had sex with more than once - especially if you have entered into a relationship with this man, it can be quite difficult and demanding. These men call, expecting and wanting what this relationship calls for, what their expectations require, all while balancing responsibilities to husband, career, children, family, very vanilla friends, and even neighbors. All the while, this man or men are calling or even just showing up, wanting what they want and have come to believe, rightly or wrongly, they have a right to expect. And, as relationships with these men deepens, these expectations and these rights, well perceived or not, expand over time.

And, since these relationships are "relationships," they become interwoven with other relationships, no matter how hard you work at discretion. You can divorce a husband, break up with a boyfriend, etc. There is no legal or socially acceptable mechanism for ending a relationship with a bull. It all has to be done through negotiation with involved parties and "non-involved" parties - all while juggling all your other responsibilities.

No one really understands this except possibly the few people directly involved - the wife, the bull and maybe the husband. No one knows what truly goes on behind someone's closed bedroom door - particularly if you have accepted another man into your marriage.

I understand what you mean. My perspective as a bull is a little bit different.
It is very important for me that my relationship with the hotwife and the relationship the hotwife has with her husband thrive. Each relationship benefits from the other so I make sure my demands are always made according to the constraints the other relationship has.
I can't take the hotwife do a little bit outdoor exhibitionism if I know she will be recognized.
I don't show up announced at their place if the ******* are still at home.
I will for example call her at work and ask her to meet me in the parking lot of her office or tell her to make a détour to meet me when she is going somewhere.
I believe the hotwife is more happy to please me as I never put her in a situation that is uncomfortable. I will ask her to do things I know she can do and will push her but never ask of her something she won't like.
While I take care of the hotwife, I never forget the husband. He is also part of this so I develop a friendly relationship with him. Without him there is no hotwife.
Thus most of my relationships have ended well. In some cases I moved away or they moved away. In some others we were not going in the same direction sexually.
Most of the time I keep in touch with my previous hotwives and we see each other when the opportunity comes either for some hot fun or just drinks. That's how I like my relationships.

 

[Reina8]

I understand what you mean. My perspective as a bull is a little bit different.
It is very important for me that my relationship with the hotwife and the relationship the hotwife has with her husband thrive. Each relationship benefits from the other so I make sure my demands are always made according to the constraints the other relationship has.
I can't take the hotwife do a little bit outdoor exhibitionism if I know she will be recognized.
I don't show up announced at their place if the ******* are still at home.
I will for example call her at work and ask her to meet me in the parking lot of her office or tell her to make a détour to meet me when she is going somewhere.
I believe the hotwife is more happy to please me as I never put her in a situation that is uncomfortable. I will ask her to do things I know she can do and will push her but never ask of her something she won't like.
While I take care of the hotwife, I never forget the husband. He is also part of this so I develop a friendly relationship with him. Without him there is no hotwife.
Thus most of my relationships have ended well. In some cases I moved away or they moved away. In some others we were not going in the same direction sexually.
Most of the time I keep in touch with my previous hotwives and we see each other when the opportunity comes either for some hot fun or just drinks. That's how I like my relationships.

Bravo, well said. It is important to have boundaries and expectations stated up front, but also with the understanding that relationships can become fluid as well.

 

[LakeMarymom]

Most people, even people "in the lifestyle" or privy to candid discussion about the lifestyle, do not realize that there is a lot about this lifestyle that is different than the lives vanilla people lead.

When you have one male you are married tom but another man that you have had sex with more than once - especially if you have entered into a relationship with this man, it can be quite difficult and demanding. These men call, expecting and wanting what this relationship calls for, what their expectations require, all while balancing responsibilities to husband, career, children, family, very vanilla friends, and even neighbors. All the while, this man or men are calling or even just showing up, wanting what they want and have come to believe, rightly or wrongly, they have a right to expect. And, as relationships with these men deepens, these expectations and these rights, well perceived or not, expand over time.

And, since these relationships are "relationships," they become interwoven with other relationships, no matter how hard you work at discretion. You can divorce a husband, break up with a boyfriend, etc. There is no legal or socially acceptable mechanism for ending a relationship with a bull. It all has to be done through negotiation with involved parties and "non-involved" parties - all while juggling all your other responsibilities.

No one really understands this except possibly the few people directly involved - the wife, the bull and maybe the husband. No one knows what truly goes on behind someone's closed bedroom door - particularly if you have accepted another man into your marriage.

Thank you for sharing this, I am new and just starting the exploration of this and this is just the kind of info and answers/prepares me for what I might expect/encounter. Thank you Christy for such a good post and I can't wait to explore you other posts.

 

[Studcuck35]

Most people, even people "in the lifestyle" or privy to candid discussion about the lifestyle, do not realize that there is a lot about this lifestyle that is different than the lives vanilla people lead.

When you have one male you are married tom but another man that you have had sex with more than once - especially if you have entered into a relationship with this man, it can be quite difficult and demanding. These men call, expecting and wanting what this relationship calls for, what their expectations require, all while balancing responsibilities to husband, career, children, family, very vanilla friends, and even neighbors. All the while, this man or men are calling or even just showing up, wanting what they want and have come to believe, rightly or wrongly, they have a right to expect. And, as relationships with these men deepens, these expectations and these rights, well perceived or not, expand over time.

And, since these relationships are "relationships," they become interwoven with other relationships, no matter how hard you work at discretion. You can divorce a husband, break up with a boyfriend, etc. There is no legal or socially acceptable mechanism for ending a relationship with a bull. It all has to be done through negotiation with involved parties and "non-involved" parties - all while juggling all your other responsibilities.

No one really understands this except possibly the few people directly involved - the wife, the bull and maybe the husband. No one knows what truly goes on behind someone's closed bedroom door - particularly if you have accepted another man into your marriage.

Very well put

 

[jeff & christy]

Bravo, well said. It is important to have boundaries and expectations stated up front, but also with the understanding that relationships can become fluid as well.

Often, very fluid . . . Just saying. There are a lot of upsides to compromising your preconceived boundaries. The best fucking is rarely "comfortable."

 

[JnPQoS4BBC]

I understand what you mean. My perspective as a bull is a little bit different.
It is very important for me that my relationship with the hotwife and the relationship the hotwife has with her husband thrive. Each relationship benefits from the other so I make sure my demands are always made according to the constraints the other relationship has.
I can't take the hotwife do a little bit outdoor exhibitionism if I know she will be recognized.
I don't show up announced at their place if the ******* are still at home.
I will for example call her at work and ask her to meet me in the parking lot of her office or tell her to make a détour to meet me when she is going somewhere.
I believe the hotwife is more happy to please me as I never put her in a situation that is uncomfortable. I will ask her to do things I know she can do and will push her but never ask of her something she won't like.
While I take care of the hotwife, I never forget the husband. He is also part of this so I develop a friendly relationship with him. Without him there is no hotwife.
Thus most of my relationships have ended well. In some cases I moved away or they moved away. In some others we were not going in the same direction sexually.
Most of the time I keep in touch with my previous hotwives and we see each other when the opportunity comes either for some hot fun or just drinks. That's how I like my relationships.

Very well stated. Understanding like this is very rare and what we (and probably most couples), are looking for.

 

[funcouple52661]

We don’t mix private life or personal life with play. We would never play with someone local or give anyone exclusive access

 

[jaja1chocdk1]

From my experience, there are different levels/tiers of the "lifestyle" and so it is a spectrum of behaviors and practices. There are couples, who meet up every other week and meeting up is big part of their sex life. Then there are conventions, meet and greets etc and other events/activities in between. There are cucks, porn stars, stag/vixen, OF wives, Bulls, Doms, subs etc. As a single male, I am on here to meet women/couples, however if there isn't a fit, I don't believe in forsing it. It isn't a 24/7 way of living for me. More like a dessert to regular vanilla dating life, and pleasing a hot-wife/woman while letting off some steam.
One thing I will say though is that folks in the lifestyle have a higher level of confidence that comes with being in tune with their thoughts/emotions. I remember having a husband tell me he loved his wife dearly and he wanted her to have sex with me, because he wants her to be satisfied sexually. This notion goes the typical love=sex sex=love that most of us are raised with. It opens the darker sides/hidden sides of our personality, which in turn makes us more human and more in synch.

 

[Beto27]

I understand what you mean. My perspective as a bull is a little bit different.
It is very important for me that my relationship with the hotwife and the relationship the hotwife has with her husband thrive. Each relationship benefits from the other so I make sure my demands are always made according to the constraints the other relationship has.
I can't take the hotwife do a little bit outdoor exhibitionism if I know she will be recognized.
I don't show up announced at their place if the ******* are still at home.
I will for example call her at work and ask her to meet me in the parking lot of her office or tell her to make a détour to meet me when she is going somewhere.
I believe the hotwife is more happy to please me as I never put her in a situation that is uncomfortable. I will ask her to do things I know she can do and will push her but never ask of her something she won't like.
While I take care of the hotwife, I never forget the husband. He is also part of this so I develop a friendly relationship with him. Without him there is no hotwife.
Thus most of my relationships have ended well. In some cases I moved away or they moved away. In some others we were not going in the same direction sexually.
Most of the time I keep in touch with my previous hotwives and we see each other when the opportunity comes either for some hot fun or just drinks. That's how I like my relationships.

God bless you and bulls that think the way you do. Your opinion brings hope to this lifestyle.

What matters is honesty and balance. I am aware that white pussy loves black cock, no matter how many white girls will try to deny it. But you as a BBC, your role is to breed, not to degrade anyone. Men like you are precious. When my wife gets bred, I will aim that she gets bred by a bull that has mindset close to yours. ❤

 

[Lhomme]

God bless you and bulls that think the way you do. Your opinion brings hope to this lifestyle.

What matters is honesty and balance. I am aware that white pussy loves black cock, no matter how many white girls will try to deny it. But you as a BBC, your role is to breed, not to degrade anyone. Men like you are precious. When my wife gets bred, I will aim that she gets bred by a bull that has mindset close to yours. ❤

Beto, just want to say I appreciate your enthusiasm and conscious thought that you put into your response...If I could just say one thing...As a Black male in this lifestyle I want to make sure that we are not lumping all BBC into the idea that their "role" is to breed. In some fantasies...perhaps you and your wife's...this may be the case, but it's important to remember for every BBC there is a Black man attached with their own ideas of how they slang they thang. And while sometimes I'm in the mood to bury deep and fill her up...other times I'm trying to discover just how much she likes sucking my dick.

I mean this in no disrespect, and honesty is always the best policy.
stay juicy,
-L

 

[PJacques]

Most people, even people "in the lifestyle" or privy to candid discussion about the lifestyle, do not realize that there is a lot about this lifestyle that is different than the lives vanilla people lead.

When you have one male you are married tom but another man that you have had sex with more than once - especially if you have entered into a relationship with this man, it can be quite difficult and demanding. These men call, expecting and wanting what this relationship calls for, what their expectations require, all while balancing responsibilities to husband, career, children, family, very vanilla friends, and even neighbors. All the while, this man or men are calling or even just showing up, wanting what they want and have come to believe, rightly or wrongly, they have a right to expect. And, as relationships with these men deepens, these expectations and these rights, well perceived or not, expand over time.

And, since these relationships are "relationships," they become interwoven with other relationships, no matter how hard you work at discretion. You can divorce a husband, break up with a boyfriend, etc. There is no legal or socially acceptable mechanism for ending a relationship with a bull. It all has to be done through negotiation with involved parties and "non-involved" parties - all while juggling all your other responsibilities.

No one really understands this except possibly the few people directly involved - the wife, the bull and maybe the husband. No one knows what truly goes on behind someone's closed bedroom door - particularly if you have accepted another man into your marriage.

Very true