I am not sure if this is the correct place to post about this but figured maybe could find some advice or people with more insight into this kind of thing here. I will try not to go into much personal details here for privacy reasons but will include most details that could be in any way relevant.
My girlfriend, Nathalie and I are both European in our early 20s. We knew each other for a long time but started being intimate about a year before. We previously discussed swinging or maybe doing something with another couple but nothing concrete, mostly a bit during sex and thats about it. Sometimes wed argue about things like immigration politics and other meaningless things as a result of both of us wanting to be the one "wearing the pants in the relationship" figuratively speaking, but otherwise we always got along pretty well without any major problems. We just got engaged few weeks prior and then took a vacation to Mykonos, one of these party islands in Greece.
We rented out one of those small houses that the island is filled with thats basically one big room with 3 beds in different corners and another small room thats a toilet. Everything was going well when on the second night of us being there, I got a call from my ex infront of my girlfriend, and long story short it came out that I had sex with that ex a while back, at the very start when we were just starting to go out with Nathalie. I know it was a fucked up thing to do, and i love my girlfriend a lot and wouldnt do anything of the kind nowadays, but back then it was just when it was starting out and wasnt very serious or much at all yet and I guess it just happened. Stupid, I know.
So that evening naturally was all hell breaking loose and her wanting to leave, but i managed to convince her to stay for now at least, and relay the fact that it was just something dumb when we werent even in a proper relationship and that i love her very much and nothing like that would ever happen otherwise and in the future. I guess I somewhat managed to convince her and calm her down that she didnt fly out that very night at least. Next day it was hell again, but by evening it calmed down a bit and I felt like i made some progress with my attempts to convince her, and we went to eat, in pretty much silence the whole time though. Then she started getting chatty with some guy near the restaurant toilets, and after we again got into an arguement and left the place. I then went home and she said she needed some time alone to think.
So I am at that little so called villa that we rented and its about 1 am at this point. I suddenly get a text from her saying that I will go along with what she says or she will break up with me on the spot, fly away for good and that will be the end of our relationship guaranteed. She then stumbles through the door with two black guys. Now I am a pretty big guy myself, about 120kgs as we both were always into working out, but one of those guys looked like he was almost double the height and size, what seemed like shaquile o neal on extra dose of steroids. She introduced me as quote: "my college friend that we had a thing with long time ago that i told you about". We proceed to have some drinks together, everyone was pretty tipsy at that point. Eventually the guys get up to leave and she walks them to the door, everyone said their goodbyes from what I understood and then the guy i described earlier came back in after having a short chat with his friend outside. My girlfriend closed the door behind him and then turned off the lights.
I was already sitting in our bed at the other end of the room, so i could only hear faint whispers coming from the door at that point. I hear some whispers, some shuffling and then I could hear what i would assume is them making out, undressing and my girlfriend starting to suck his dick on the bed that was near the door. Im really lost because I dont know what to do, im jealous and mad as hell but at the same time i really love her and wanted to do everything to fix the situation and didnt want her to break off the relationship fully as she said she would, after that whole incident. Im sitting there in darkness hearing her blow him, and then the pounding starts and she moans like shes possessed. It was insane and went on for maybe an hour or so with very small breaks inbetween. This whole time im just too shocked and not wanting to lose her to say anything otherwise.Eventually it stops, and some minutes later he leaves. My girlfriend turns on the light, we dont speak at all, but she passes up very near where im laying on purpose on her way to the shower/toilet room, fully naked, all wet from sweat and her chest/face covered in cum, im guessing just to try and make me feel as bad as she possibly can. She showers, then turns off the light and goes to sleep in the other bed. Its hard to describe my emotions but naturally i didnt get much sleep that night.
Next day, not to go into too much detail, but when i confront her about it, she says that I will "be quiet and not interfer" or again, shes not even going to bother considering staying in this relationship. Along with saying how i deserve it and she doesnt care if i like it or not, and doesnt care if this relationship ends this very second if i dont like this. So over the next few days id go along with what was basically some food/drinks, and then hanging out with that guys group of friends and then him fucking her brains out every night. I think at some point he even asked if its maybe better they find another place to do it but she said its not a problem and that she enjoyed someone watching, so the guy didnt argue very much against that as one would guess. Moreover she refused to have sex with me at all. So after about 10 days of this routine and her doing everything she could to make me as jealous as possible at every opportunity and banging that guy every day for hours, the trip was nearing the end and we left the island and flew back home.
Now I am not sure what to do with all this, because its too much arguements and talking to write here but basically now she seems up for continuing our relationship where we left off but i am not sure what to make of this. Of course i love her very much but i cant even describe how jealous i am and i can make even less sense of all this. Does she not care at all or was this just one time payback that she thought was appropriate? Or where to go from here is basically my question and why im writing all this. Should still proceed with engagement.. and then what this means swinging is in the picture or just her doing others or was this a one time thing or what. Or maybe i just wanted to get this off my chest because obviously i cant discuss this with anyone in person. Maybe someone here has some insight on something similar. Much appreciated
. Your young... Just enjoy it, don't take it too seriously. Have fun and dump her ass when somthing better comes along.
