So sitting here typing this and a little frustrated. This is little long winded so apologize. We have been married for 22 yrs. and though not all peaches and cream, we have had our differences, nothing major and nothing we cannot work through. About 14 yrs. ago we decided to give this a try. It appealed to both of us on some levels and for allot of the time we used it for fantasy purposes during sex. We finally hooked up with a black guy and though it was not awful it was nothing to go back for various reasons. So we took a some time off due to kids and other stuff and around 12 yrs. ago wife decided to setup a meet and greet with a guy she seen through darkcavern for my bday. Needless to say we met up, they hit it off great and we were off to hotel after some drinks and dancing. This guy was actually the BBC we thought first guy should be. Built, 9in, the whole deal. She played with him, I got a little nervous of her taking it and so she finished him off by blowjob and titfucking him. Needless to say he was happy and left as lived close by. We talked and I felt guilty so called and asked if he wanted to come back and he did. So he comes in they go back at it, before I know it she is on back getting fucked bareback and really pounded. Never expected the bareback like that, she opened right up. Needless to say it was great, fucked her that way and then doggy till he came all over her ass and she came several times and got hammered. Great experience, she was wet for 4 days after and loved it. Then 4 weeks later met for dinner, went to his place, we talked she got anxious and stood up and hiked her skirt a little and said time is wasting and I got no panties on. Needless to say they 69, she rode him on his couch, he did her doggy, I videotaped, he came on her ass again. They met up 2 more times over the next year or so and fucked pretty good, she even let him cum on her pussy and then rubbed it all around and fingered herself with it. Took some time off and a year or so later decided itch had hit. Met up with new guy, he was hung like horse, hit it off, went to hotel and she got fucked 3 times that night. First time condom and he came inside with it on, second time she asked if bareback was ok and I consented and he came on her stomach, third time she wanted him due to size to cum inside and she had her first creampie. They met up again a little while down the road, fucked twice one night, he came in her twice, she loved the creampies and feeling it shoot inside and being stretched. Then again we took a little break for various reasons. Decided again to go at it, so met another guy, Was at strip bar, they hit off, made out by truck, and then jumped in back and had some fun. Next night met at hotel, she got fucked bareback and he came in her doggy and she loved it as it was huge load. Then he fucked her raw again later in evening. I could not even touch that pussy for 2 days. We had some differences in life and for last 4 years have not done anything, we do not even talk about it as she said she did not enjoy it. Ok fine, but camera, videos, and then after talks say otherwise. Since it is something I really like now it haunts me and I want some play, but we have gotten to point we hardly have sex. She is not cheating, I am not, it just seems like all the fun is gone completely. Why do I tell you all this, just to vent, but for life of cannot understand whats going on with her to change so suddenly. Does not want to look at porn, no Cinemax movies, nothing, almost prude like. She says sex is ok to have but just normal, mom and pop boring sex and maybe thrown in black dildo every once in awhile. So again the dildo makes he cum all the time. So do I actually when we do, just cannot understand the thought process. Any input would be helpful if anyone has any ideas from womans point of view.