So, here we are on black to white as a couple.
For me, the male half, this is truly surreal. I have been a great fan of this site and have personally enjoyed it for many, many years as a single man. It is so strange to know I'll be here as a couple. I thought it important to contribute something to the site after having so benefited from reading other peoples posts and experiences over the past decade. So first a little background, a few comments from myself, and then the female half of our relationship will post as well.
We are both survivors of childhood abuse. Therefore, our journey to discover, identify, and on our own individual sexualities has been troublesome at best. In my part, I have been more or less sexually anorexic the majority of my life, and simply have had my sexual needs met primarily as a conscientious observer on sites such as these.
I met my partner in the 12 step community and never imagined we would be anything more than sober buddies. It was beautiful, as I just so adored her as a dear friend. However, due to a very large age difference, and the fact that she was identified as a lesbian for the past 10 years, made the idea of us being together, romantically more than a little absurd. Our old friend, who is in the kink community, introduced us into an experience with something called a violet wand, and something magical, sexual, and sacred exploded between us. In fact, we just got married in March less than a year later, and are living happily ever after.
We both made a commitment to experience radical intimacy without holding anything back. This included our sexual proclivities and fantasies. I disclosed my enjoyment of the site, as well as some other things that I am interested in, but were deeply shameful in nature. She disclosed some of her deep, dark secrets in turn. We both spent some time, trying to decide if some of our kinks were more nurture than nature, and potentially a direct result of our childhood abuse, and *******. In the end, we decided it really didn't matter, and it was our obligation to ourselves, and to each other to simply accept what we are now. We have made a commitment to do so in an empowered way that leaves no room for shame, doubt, or apology.
We attended a swing club in Riverside called Taboo. While there we made the acquaintance of a lovely black man who was funny and gracious, and seemed to inherently respect our boundaries. We just felt safe with him. So, we summoned up our courage and invited him to our home. It was a thrilling but somewhat awkward first experience. We tried to do so again, but the wedding and all that was involved in that got in the way.
We are now getting both the house and ourselves ready for his arrival for a second visit in the next three hours. We are so excited, horny, agitated, and happy, or downright giddy. We just ran over to Best Buy to pick up something called an SD memory card for my old video camera in the hopes that we may try filming for the first time. I was quite apprehensive during our first encounter, because there are inherent boundaries between men in our society, being that close to a naked man was awkward I think, for both of us, it actually took away from the full enjoyment of the experience.
He also had some hesitancy on his end, because he wanted to be sensitive to the comfort level of my wife. Tonight I believe we will make some real progress and relaxing on both these issues, and not letting it get in the way. At least that's my determination.
I told my wife that I am doing this because I love and adore her. I also let her know that it's my kink. Compersion is my middle name. Therefore, I made it clear that the more she allows herself to relax, and fully enjoy the experience, the greater my experience will be. The first time was a bit of a challenge for her because this is not what she was taught to do. In fact, her evangelical family slut shamed her from an early age. That combined with her abuse, left her in quite a pretzel. A while ago I bought her the book The Ethical Slut, and I was thrilled that she not only read it, but was also highlighting sections to share with me. The fact that she is able to participate in this now is extraordinary. I am so very, very proud of her.
OK, enough out of me. I just wanted to give a bit of background to who we are, and where we find ourselves early in this new lifestyle. Thank you to all the brave people who contributed to the site. Your stories, your experiences, your growth, your disappointments, and your joys have been thrilling to me over the years.
I was always somewhat perplexed as to how much of what I have read was made up. I have to admit even the stuff that probably was thrilled me. I promise you that everything that I just wrote, I will write in the future is absolutely, positively real.
We are also active in the Kink community, have a profile on FetLife, and regularly attend the munches in our area.
HER:
There is SO much that I want to say. This is so new for me. NEVER in my life did I think that I would be this sexually free and uninhibited. Never in my life did I think that I would begin to break out of the prison that my trauma and religious upbringing locked me in. I never thought I would be able to be so disclosed with another human being only to find that our sexual proclivities and fantasies align perfectly! There is no shame or embarrassment. I am living in a space of safety and sexual bliss that I never knew existed. I never knew that I could derive so much pleasure from being pounded by a BBC while lovingly staring into my husband’s eyes. Each thrust solidifying my undying love for him and the compersion he has.
I am so excited for tonight’s date! This will be the first time I am going to be with a BBC since getting married last month! There are so many mixed emotions that are coming up. I am absolutely exhilarated, but a little nervous at the same time. There’s feelings coming up about whether or not I should wear my wedding ring while being mercilessly pounded by another man! I think the answer to that is HELL YA I’m wearing it! I am a complete and ethical slut and loving every minute of it. It is my freedom, my power, and my right. This lifestyle has fundamentally freed me. There are still many emotions to work through, but for the first time in my life I can say that I truly LOVE sex and that is nothing to be ashamed about.
Him: we're going to post this now, and then try to post tomorrow after our evening has concluded. I've so enjoyed the post here that border on erotica, but I'm not sure we're in position to replicate that ourselves (sorry about that). Nevertheless, we hope there is a titillation inherent to our sharing experiences with your good folks here in our shared lifestyle. We have our friend's permission to take some pictures without faces tonight. If we successfully pull this off, we will post a few here just for fun.
For me, the male half, this is truly surreal. I have been a great fan of this site and have personally enjoyed it for many, many years as a single man. It is so strange to know I'll be here as a couple. I thought it important to contribute something to the site after having so benefited from reading other peoples posts and experiences over the past decade. So first a little background, a few comments from myself, and then the female half of our relationship will post as well.
We are both survivors of childhood abuse. Therefore, our journey to discover, identify, and on our own individual sexualities has been troublesome at best. In my part, I have been more or less sexually anorexic the majority of my life, and simply have had my sexual needs met primarily as a conscientious observer on sites such as these.
I met my partner in the 12 step community and never imagined we would be anything more than sober buddies. It was beautiful, as I just so adored her as a dear friend. However, due to a very large age difference, and the fact that she was identified as a lesbian for the past 10 years, made the idea of us being together, romantically more than a little absurd. Our old friend, who is in the kink community, introduced us into an experience with something called a violet wand, and something magical, sexual, and sacred exploded between us. In fact, we just got married in March less than a year later, and are living happily ever after.
We both made a commitment to experience radical intimacy without holding anything back. This included our sexual proclivities and fantasies. I disclosed my enjoyment of the site, as well as some other things that I am interested in, but were deeply shameful in nature. She disclosed some of her deep, dark secrets in turn. We both spent some time, trying to decide if some of our kinks were more nurture than nature, and potentially a direct result of our childhood abuse, and *******. In the end, we decided it really didn't matter, and it was our obligation to ourselves, and to each other to simply accept what we are now. We have made a commitment to do so in an empowered way that leaves no room for shame, doubt, or apology.
We attended a swing club in Riverside called Taboo. While there we made the acquaintance of a lovely black man who was funny and gracious, and seemed to inherently respect our boundaries. We just felt safe with him. So, we summoned up our courage and invited him to our home. It was a thrilling but somewhat awkward first experience. We tried to do so again, but the wedding and all that was involved in that got in the way.
We are now getting both the house and ourselves ready for his arrival for a second visit in the next three hours. We are so excited, horny, agitated, and happy, or downright giddy. We just ran over to Best Buy to pick up something called an SD memory card for my old video camera in the hopes that we may try filming for the first time. I was quite apprehensive during our first encounter, because there are inherent boundaries between men in our society, being that close to a naked man was awkward I think, for both of us, it actually took away from the full enjoyment of the experience.
He also had some hesitancy on his end, because he wanted to be sensitive to the comfort level of my wife. Tonight I believe we will make some real progress and relaxing on both these issues, and not letting it get in the way. At least that's my determination.
I told my wife that I am doing this because I love and adore her. I also let her know that it's my kink. Compersion is my middle name. Therefore, I made it clear that the more she allows herself to relax, and fully enjoy the experience, the greater my experience will be. The first time was a bit of a challenge for her because this is not what she was taught to do. In fact, her evangelical family slut shamed her from an early age. That combined with her abuse, left her in quite a pretzel. A while ago I bought her the book The Ethical Slut, and I was thrilled that she not only read it, but was also highlighting sections to share with me. The fact that she is able to participate in this now is extraordinary. I am so very, very proud of her.
OK, enough out of me. I just wanted to give a bit of background to who we are, and where we find ourselves early in this new lifestyle. Thank you to all the brave people who contributed to the site. Your stories, your experiences, your growth, your disappointments, and your joys have been thrilling to me over the years.
I was always somewhat perplexed as to how much of what I have read was made up. I have to admit even the stuff that probably was thrilled me. I promise you that everything that I just wrote, I will write in the future is absolutely, positively real.
We are also active in the Kink community, have a profile on FetLife, and regularly attend the munches in our area.
HER:
There is SO much that I want to say. This is so new for me. NEVER in my life did I think that I would be this sexually free and uninhibited. Never in my life did I think that I would begin to break out of the prison that my trauma and religious upbringing locked me in. I never thought I would be able to be so disclosed with another human being only to find that our sexual proclivities and fantasies align perfectly! There is no shame or embarrassment. I am living in a space of safety and sexual bliss that I never knew existed. I never knew that I could derive so much pleasure from being pounded by a BBC while lovingly staring into my husband’s eyes. Each thrust solidifying my undying love for him and the compersion he has.
I am so excited for tonight’s date! This will be the first time I am going to be with a BBC since getting married last month! There are so many mixed emotions that are coming up. I am absolutely exhilarated, but a little nervous at the same time. There’s feelings coming up about whether or not I should wear my wedding ring while being mercilessly pounded by another man! I think the answer to that is HELL YA I’m wearing it! I am a complete and ethical slut and loving every minute of it. It is my freedom, my power, and my right. This lifestyle has fundamentally freed me. There are still many emotions to work through, but for the first time in my life I can say that I truly LOVE sex and that is nothing to be ashamed about.
Him: we're going to post this now, and then try to post tomorrow after our evening has concluded. I've so enjoyed the post here that border on erotica, but I'm not sure we're in position to replicate that ourselves (sorry about that). Nevertheless, we hope there is a titillation inherent to our sharing experiences with your good folks here in our shared lifestyle. We have our friend's permission to take some pictures without faces tonight. If we successfully pull this off, we will post a few here just for fun.
.
