If you have read my contributions, you know that a few weeks ago I set up a Massage for my wife and I and I had arranged for her to get a masseur instead of a masseuse. It would be the first time she would ever have another mans hands on her naked body. I thought it would be a good step into sharing. Well something went sideways somewhere. When it came time to head out the door for the massage my wife's best friend and her husband showed up. I was not sure what was going on when my wife invited them to come with us. When we got to the place for the massages, she asked if there was a way to do a double couples. They said no. So the girls decided that us husband could use the reservation since it was Fathers Day weekend. I protested, but she and her friend insisted. The entire time we were in the massage I was trying to figure out what was going on. I was not sure to make of the situation or the comment that she made before they left. That they had a surprise for us when we were done. When we were done, the girls were no where to be found. We called and texted, no answer. Since I drove, I headed to my wife's friends house to drop her husband. As we did, we noticed the door was still open. Cautiously we walked into his house to find it half empty. Trying to figure out what was going on, we called and texted again. Still nothing. We didn't call the police because he had noticed that only his wife's stuff was gone, so we headed to my house. When we arrived my wife was just finishing loading her car in the drive way. We inquired what was going on. She explained that the kids would be staying at her parents for a while and that she and her friend were moving out until things could be settled. I was shocked to say the least. She explained how her friend and she compared notes on their sex lives. They began to see some patterns of behavior that they did not like. Her friend had told her that her husband had started talking about doing things outside the marriage a couple years earlier. She explained how they slowly talked and worked their way into things that at first seemed fun and exciting but then became very ugly and harsh. The low down was that he had had several affairs before he had even talked to her about doing things with other people. Then when they started doing things with other people he began to change. She had never actually gone to bed with another man, but had gone on a date with just one guy. Shortly after that, in a drunken stupor her husband would confess that the night she went out, he had gone and met with one of his girl friends and took her to bed. He began lying again and so on. How this affected me is, my wife thought I had/have been doing the same things. That by making some of my suggestions I was trying to cover up things I had or were doing. In a weird way, this has actually been a good thing I think in the long run. First of all, like everyone on here says, communication is KEY. We have talked openly about our relationship and ideas we have shared. She finally believes me when I say I have not done anything, which I haven't. And she is starting to trust me that I am being totally honest with her and that if any of this makes her uncomfortable we simply will not do it. I will not jeopardize our marriage for sex. At the same time, because of the separation and the increased open communication, we are better when we spend time together. We have our first date night planned for this Friday and if it goes well, she says she will consider moving home Saturday. She says she cant wait to go out and that she is very excited to feel like she is a wanted sexy woman again. She says this has opened up new and exciting feelings in her and she is excited to share them. I do not know what will come of this, but I am truly hopping to avoid a disaster. The kids just feel like they are on vacation at Grand Mas so they are none the wiser, which is good too. I just wanted to share with everyone here that if your not careful what you wish for, you might get it without any say. Her friend and her husband are splitting up. Funny thing is, he is crushed and cant believe she would do this to him, and she is relieved because it happened before kids and in her perspective, she is still young and hot. Just thought I would share.