Different scenario for us. I have been totally transparent about my fantasy. The guy hitting on her, it would be with me around. She knows this fantasy is scorching hot for me.
A direct approach with my wife won’t work. But if I didn’t push her to get out of her comfort zone nothing would have happened sexually, besides really watered down vanilla sex. No sex talk, no role play, no toys, no porn, no oral sex. Not kidding at all. She has resisted all of that initially, but has gotten beyond her inhibitions/hang ups and had amazing oragsms as a result.
Her self esteem is low so besides her normal initial baggage due to her Catholic upbringing, if I told her I wanted to arrange a meet up she would assume I paid the guy or somehow had to talk him into it. A guy who comes on to her and expresses attraction “out in the wild” would be a big boost for her confidence. That coupled with being away from home and in vaca mode, I can see her really letting loose and possibly making my fantasy a reality. No guarantees but she’s a very kind, nice person so even if she were to reject his advances she would do so with a big smile on her blushing face and we’d fuck like rabbits later. It’s totally her call as to what if anything happens, where and with whom. I just want to create opportunities for her to make the call.
Make sense?