"Best" current lifestyle "dating" site these days, which do you recommend, and why?

Elelator_Cpl

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We haven't had an active profile on any "swinger" or "lifestyle" sites such as SLS, SDC, AFF, LL, Fet Life, etc in a very long time... years before the pandemic actually, and then the pandemic itself slowed down most lifestyle activities to a near halt of course.

But now with that behind us, and things beginning to return to mostly normal over the last year or so, we thought we might create some new profiles on a site or two since B2W isn't really a "dating" (if that's what those sites should be called :rolleyes: ) site/forum per se.

We had been members of Lifestyle Lounge and Swing Life Style most recently some years back, and others that are long lost to the fog of time... all with mixed results.

So instead of just revisiting those sites without checking, I thought I'd start a thread talking about which sites were the "best" lately. But what does "best" mean? That would certainly vary depending on who is asking, but perhaps the following criteria may help identify which sites may be effective and welcoming for some people.

One interesting observation was that we found that although hosted in the greater Internet, some of these sites perhaps surprisingly often had a regional impact/presence with most of the active members and activities seemingly regionalized to specific areas of the country. For example Lifestyle Lounge some years ago seemed to have a more west coast focused membership, specifically California. And Swing Life Style seemed to be more east cost focused, specifically in the southeast. I'm not sure if that is still the case, but it seemed to be true some years ago. So if that is still somewhat true for a given site, that might be good to note for others to be aware of when deciding which site to put the most effort into. After all if you live in Georgia, but the site you are on is heavily populated with members west of the Rockies, that may not be the best site for you to put a lot of effort into.

And of course, some sites seemed to more welcoming or with more accounts from members that have certain similar preferences and interests. It might be interesting to hear what others have experienced as members of some of those sites in the last few years, and identify if one site might be more friendly and productive for say B2W members or other interests (e.g. LGBTQ+, BDSM, groups, parties, etc).

And finally, how well did the overall site and its tools and features (e.g. messaging, photo management, forum, friend management, etc) make it really effective at finding people with similar interests, managing those friends, and ultimately meeting people?

Does that all cover "best"? Again, I suppose it depends, and feel free to add more criteria of what constitutes "best".

But ultimately we would love to hear about others' recent or long-term experiences with some of these lifestyle "dating" sites, which ones do seem to have survived and grown following the pandemic, and if you thought the effort and perhaps cost was worth it for a given site. We, like others too I suspect, don't want to maintain several profiles, but instead focus on one or maybe two that provide the most value based upon your own criteria, because it can be a lot of work otherwise ;)

Thanks!
 
We haven't had an active profile on any "swinger" or "lifestyle" sites such as SLS, SDC, AFF, LL, Fet Life, etc in a very long time... years before the pandemic actually, and then the pandemic itself slowed down most lifestyle activities to a near halt of course.

But now with that behind us, and things beginning to return to mostly normal over the last year or so, we thought we might create some new profiles on a site or two since B2W isn't really a "dating" (if that's what those sites should be called :rolleyes: ) site/forum per se.

We had been members of Lifestyle Lounge and Swing Life Style most recently some years back, and others that are long lost to the fog of time... all with mixed results.

So instead of just revisiting those sites without checking, I thought I'd start a thread talking about which sites were the "best" lately. But what does "best" mean? That would certainly vary depending on who is asking, but perhaps the following criteria may help identify which sites may be effective and welcoming for some people.

One interesting observation was that we found that although hosted in the greater Internet, some of these sites perhaps surprisingly often had a regional impact/presence with most of the active members and activities seemingly regionalized to specific areas of the country. For example Lifestyle Lounge some years ago seemed to have a more west coast focused membership, specifically California. And Swing Life Style seemed to be more east cost focused, specifically in the southeast. I'm not sure if that is still the case, but it seemed to be true some years ago. So if that is still somewhat true for a given site, that might be good to note for others to be aware of when deciding which site to put the most effort into. After all if you live in Georgia, but the site you are on is heavily populated with members west of the Rockies, that may not be the best site for you to put a lot of effort into.

And of course, some sites seemed to more welcoming or with more accounts from members that have certain similar preferences and interests. It might be interesting to hear what others have experienced as members of some of those sites in the last few years, and identify if one site might be more friendly and productive for say B2W members or other interests (e.g. LGBTQ+, BDSM, groups, parties, etc).

And finally, how well did the overall site and its tools and features (e.g. messaging, photo management, forum, friend management, etc) make it really effective at finding people with similar interests, managing those friends, and ultimately meeting people?

Does that all cover "best"? Again, I suppose it depends, and feel free to add more criteria of what constitutes "best".

But ultimately we would love to hear about others' recent or long-term experiences with some of these lifestyle "dating" sites, which ones do seem to have survived and grown following the pandemic, and if you thought the effort and perhaps cost was worth it for a given site. We, like others too I suspect, don't want to maintain several profiles, but instead focus on one or maybe two that provide the most value based upon your own criteria, because it can be a lot of work otherwise ;)

Thanks!
We use BLK
1- we have current pictures
2- explain a little about the lifestyle
3- are extremely honest about what we are looking for.
Communication is key. We only use that app now whether it’s for locals or when we travel.
 
We use BLK
1- we have current pictures
2- explain a little about the lifestyle
3- are extremely honest about what we are looking for.
Communication is key. We only use that app now whether it’s for locals or when we travel.

Thanks, which site is "BLK"? Tried Googling that, but no luck ;)

It depends on what you are looking for. We like SLS for couple connections and FetLife for BBC and gangbang connections. It also depends on where you live. Lifestyle lounge was amazing when we lived in Vegas but non-existent in the Midwest.

Thank you for sharing your experience (y)

We had a similar experience and observation as we moved from one coast to the other several years ago that some (all?) of the sites have a notable regionalized majority membership, generally "east coast" and "west coast" (at least relevant to the continental divide), which isn't all that surprising given the inherent social aspect and networking between members. We also found LL for example to be strongly "west coast" heavy. That's not a bad thing of course, just something to consider when one is deciding which sites to put effort into and receive the most benefit from.

I'm not certain this regionalization is still the case, but it wouldn't be surprising if it were.

So it would be great to hear from others that can cite their current experience with a given site and if they found the membership to be more strongly represented from a given region of the country. That may prove helpful for those considering which sites to best fit where they live (y)
 
You raise many good points in your search for reliable and relatively large scale sites. We would add FetLife.com which has a large number of real active users, while it trends towards BDSM there are dozens of other kinks. There is a bit of a learning curve, and some frustrating elements, you might think of it more as a kinky social networking site. But it is large and real

Also the dating app Feeld, has a large number of users, with a definite focus of ENM dating.

Good luck in your search
 
My husband does the posting/interacting on those sites, so I cannot really speak to the geographic point. I know we have ads on SDC, SLS and Fet. The one that costs money is SDC, I think there are paid tiers of SLS and Fet but I don't think we are paying for them. My husband will sometimes show me messages or responses, and he does show many of the ones on Fet because he says they are most likely to be "gross." Which mostly seems to mean they are from Bi men who want to do things to us both, or from guys with a very silly degree of "Dom" playacting. I have heard him bitch about SLS being a crappy site, and it does look like something from 2005.

All that being said...I've had men (or they have had me) from all three.
 
I was FetLife but there were a lot of bi and weird people responding on my profile page. The final straw was this black chic who stalked me when I refused her and she was selling Pussy to weak men that want a quick lay. I'm not that guy. Just my experience , not intended to scare anyone away but you really do get responses from real people there.
 
As a Bull in Southern California AFF works great from San Diego to Los Angeles I get messages from couple's all the time on there. I get messages on Kik from people of B2W that will be visiting here in San Diego on trips. Doublelist is not as organized as Craigslist but I get a good one every three to six months off of there regardless of all the sus stuff going on there!
 
You raise many good points in your search for reliable and relatively large scale sites. We would add FetLife.com which has a large number of real active users, while it trends towards BDSM there are dozens of other kinks. There is a bit of a learning curve, and some frustrating elements, you might think of it more as a kinky social networking site. But it is large and real

Also the dating app Feeld, has a large number of users, with a definite focus of ENM dating.

Good luck in your search
Fetlife is equally divided between polyamorous sex and BDSM (often non sexual). It has good pages for regional events. From gangbangs to bondage workshops or seminars. Also non sexual socializing events.
 
I was FetLife but there were a lot of bi and weird people responding on my profile page. The final straw was this black chic who stalked me when I refused her and she was selling Pussy to weak men that want a quick lay. I'm not that guy. Just my experience , not intended to scare anyone away but you really do get responses from real people there.
We used Fetlife a number of years ago with great success when my husband was working on long-term assignments in the Memphis and then Atlanta areas, but decided to stop using it due to an increasing number of stalkers and weirdos making things unpleasant. It go to the point where we didn't trust anyone new on there anymore.
 
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I have to say from a technical/web development perspective, Fetlife is pretty impressive. The features, from the tools for group moderation to the way searches can be slice and diced, are mind-blowing. This makes the site a little unwieldy at times, but hats off to that development team. And then, of course, there is SLS on the opposite end of that scale, lol. Both are decent in terms of meeting real people, with SLS definitely more of a couples site. We tried AFF and didn't find it worth the money. Definitely miss Craiglist personals.
 
We use BLK
1- we have current pictures
We use BLK
1- we have current pictures
2- explain a little about the lifestyle
3- are extremely honest about what we are looking for.
Communication is key. We only use that app now whether it’s for locals or when we travel.
What in the heck is “BLK”?


2- explain a little about the lifestyle
3- are extremely honest about what we are looking for.
Communication is key. We only use that app now whether it’s for locals or when we travel.
 
I have to say from a technical/web development perspective, Fetlife is pretty impressive. The features, from the tools for group moderation to the way searches can be slice and diced, are mind-blowing. This makes the site a little unwieldy at times, but hats off to that development team. And then, of course, there is SLS on the opposite end of that scale, lol. Both are decent in terms of meeting real people, with SLS definitely more of a couples site. We tried AFF and didn't find it worth the money. Definitely miss Craiglist personals.
CL was such a great resource!

We use FET, but I find the search option’s unwieldy, maybe they’ve changed?
 
, certainly understand about SLS being from another era. When AOL ruled the world. Fet has lots of junk on it, but we've met many good people as well. It's got a pretty intense learning curve, and it's fair to say you get out what you put in.
I have spent a tremendous amount t of time in trying to find suitable partners for my Queen on FET, lots of strike-outs (and a staggering amount of guys who can’t read), but we’ve met two GREAT guys there!
 
CL was such a great resource!

We use FET, but I find the search option’s unwieldy, maybe they’ve changed?
Fet is not set up to search for profiles or meet people per se, but the search features by topic are robust. In most regions there are discussion groups labeled "Classifieds" that can help you connect with others. For instance there is a "Maine Classifieds" group with more than 7,000 members.
 
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