To me, safety is the priority. My girl might misinterpret something I say, and think I’m looking out for her when she’s doing something risky. No fantasy is worth putting her in danger. I’d never forgive myself if something happened.
That said, we have done it safely. It was simple really. She met a black guy at work. I listened to the two of them talk. He was respectful and eager. She got to know him and was sure he could keep his mouth shut. If it got out, it would be embarrassing with her co workers. Older men, around 40-45, seem best at not talking. But that’s a judgement call. We were sure he was safe.
Then, we had just a few rules. Everything is videoed for me. I know when she’s visiting him and she calls when she leaves. When she gets home, she’s MINE.
I would suggest you two talk this through so there are no regrets from either of you. I would say when she finds a safe guy that she finds sexy, follow your predetermined rules and go for it. But I would be certain she understands that YOU have desires too. You want to watch. If the guy is safe, she can always go back to visit him. But your fantasy is important too. Besides, there are PLENTY of chances with PLENTY of guys. Your fantasies will progress and you two will probably get kinkier. There’s no hurry. After the first time you will know more about where you are as far as the next big thing you want to try.
My girl only goes to a guy I approve of. It’s MY rule. She agrees to it. Besides, the guys I approve of have all turned out to be studs. Only one guy we decided not to go with again. They just didn't mesh.
After we are comfortable, after they have had sex with me videoing a time or 3, I offer her the opportunity to meet him on her own. With video. Sometimes we do a live video call. It’s incredibly sexy. The guys have my number and later, after Im satisfied the are okay, I share her number with him. It’s hot watching the 2 of them text and talk.
In short, take your time and find a safe guy. Make it a short first meeting(for the sake of your nerves). Be prepared for things to not go exactly as you “planned”. When she gets back, talk. Be excited for her. Hopefully you will both be in the mood for you to reclaim her right away. I tell my girl how knowing she was just with another man makes her irresistible to me. I desire her so much afterward.
Then, when you’re ready, start talking about the next time. Take it slow. Slow