Wife finally agrees to BBC but without me...

Straight Stag here,
Lately during sex, my wife has been verbally fantasizing about having sex with a black man and him even cumming in her.. After years of talking about sharing my wife with a black guy, last night she said, she wants to do it BUT is not sure she’d want me there as part of it, say’s it would be too weird.. I have mixed feelings on this.. One, for safety reasons with someone we may barely know. Two, I want it to be a threesome or at least definitely watch. I almost feel like it’s cheating without me there.
Listening from the other side of the door just isn’t the same but if that’s the only way to get her into it.. then, should I agree to it with the hopes that later she will relax and feel comfortable enough to do it with me...
Thoughts please!
Start outside then sure they will Involve you along the way
 
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