Newbie here and I finally have decided I needed to join a forum or community to help get some else's perspective on what is happening in my life. I am 50 years old white male, been happily married to my sexy wife for 23 years. A little over a year and a half ago I started to reveal my hotwife fantasy to my wife. We watched porn occasionally and I decided to slip on some of the hotwife porn on the Adam and Eve (My first Hotwife experience) The questions naturally came and I ended up revealing to my wife about my fantasies of her having sex with other men. I told her that i had been having dreams of her having sex with me and another man. I explained to her I did not want to sleep with other women but found pleasure when I saw her being pleasured. I explained what I understood compersion to mean. She didn't really understand the fantasy but she remembered I had told her about it almost 20 years ago when we first got together. She didn't say no but rather she would think about it. She told me about a week later she didn't think she wanted to do that but she didn't give me too hard of a time about the fantasy.
I felt more emboldened to watch more hotwife porn and started my own collection. I also started downloading audiobooks and watching more porn including some cuckolding porn. We ended up taking a road trip and I ended up listening to the audiobook (Accidental Hotwife) which really introduced the concept of interracial/BBC hotwifing. This really turned me on. We also downloaded and listened to "Sharing Casey" by Tara Tennyson. We listened to some podcasts including some Venus Cuckoldress podcasts and more. Our communication continue to get better and our already great sex life was a lot more intense. We talked about the hotwife proposition some more but her fear of losing our special connection is a fear of hers (and some from me also). We also went by a swinger club in New Orleans on this same trip. We did not do anything with anyone and were really nervous and didn't stay more than an hour or so before we left. We didn't even visit the upstairs rooms to see what was going on. We were kind of tired and just wanted to test the waters.
We have continued to talk over the last year and a couple of months ago when we were going to put on porn to watch to get in mood. I ended up choosing a video from Blacked.com about a husband calling and telling his wife at hotel he would have to stay later for work. She finds a black man at the pool and takes him back to her room and her boyfriend walks in on them. She tells him to leave the room. We also watched one about a Southern Belle that ends up getting a massage from a BBC and it sent me in to overdrive. I told her I really liked watching BBC porn and asked her if she had ever fantasized about having sex with a black man. She told me she had fantasized about it before. I have since role played with her during sex and told her the thought of her having interracial sex really turned me on. All of these things were of course a lot for her to process but we kept moving along. I would often search for porn on Blacked or look for some type of hotwife porn. We have had a lot of hot sex, multiple orgasms each and some hot times. At times she speaks in hypotheticals of "if we did this then......" and we explore those topics and communicate how we feel about things. She told me that she could not contain and process all this alone and she needed to talk to someone about it and one or two of her close friends. She ended up telling one of her vanilla friends and they have talked about it alot. Discussing the why's and what if you do this scenarios?
Her friend has not been real judgmental but has expressed concerns about what would happen if we pursued this fantasy in real life. I thought that she had discussed this with one friend and didn't expect that this weekend she had two other friends over to our house for the weekend and she has told both of them too. She told them that I wanted to watch her fuck other men. She told them I wanted to see her with a black man and that my favorite porn is the white wife being massaged by the big black man and him fucking her. She told me both of them weren't judgmental but I can't help but think that they are also antagonistic to this type of lifestyle.
At first it bothered me that she told these two friends who are very vanilla and actually friends she met through church. She said they asked her what she thought about it and if she had decided if she was going to do any of it. She said she told them she hadn't decided yet and wasn't sure if she was ready for that next step yet. I feel like that I was basically outed now that it is out to 3 of her friends the information will find its way to other ears. Part of that is a relief so I don't have to hide who I am but I am not sure I was ready for this many people to know my fetish and kinks. What am I to make of these events? What impact will it have now that she has told 3 friends? I have tried not to push this fantasy too hard with her but maybe I have. It is really odd knowing her 3 friends all know this about me now. I don't know if they weren't too judgmental if that makes it easier for her to want to move forward or if it matters at all. I genuinely only want her to do this if she really wants to and I tell her that often. But I can't deny how much of it is a kink to me,
I felt more emboldened to watch more hotwife porn and started my own collection. I also started downloading audiobooks and watching more porn including some cuckolding porn. We ended up taking a road trip and I ended up listening to the audiobook (Accidental Hotwife) which really introduced the concept of interracial/BBC hotwifing. This really turned me on. We also downloaded and listened to "Sharing Casey" by Tara Tennyson. We listened to some podcasts including some Venus Cuckoldress podcasts and more. Our communication continue to get better and our already great sex life was a lot more intense. We talked about the hotwife proposition some more but her fear of losing our special connection is a fear of hers (and some from me also). We also went by a swinger club in New Orleans on this same trip. We did not do anything with anyone and were really nervous and didn't stay more than an hour or so before we left. We didn't even visit the upstairs rooms to see what was going on. We were kind of tired and just wanted to test the waters.
We have continued to talk over the last year and a couple of months ago when we were going to put on porn to watch to get in mood. I ended up choosing a video from Blacked.com about a husband calling and telling his wife at hotel he would have to stay later for work. She finds a black man at the pool and takes him back to her room and her boyfriend walks in on them. She tells him to leave the room. We also watched one about a Southern Belle that ends up getting a massage from a BBC and it sent me in to overdrive. I told her I really liked watching BBC porn and asked her if she had ever fantasized about having sex with a black man. She told me she had fantasized about it before. I have since role played with her during sex and told her the thought of her having interracial sex really turned me on. All of these things were of course a lot for her to process but we kept moving along. I would often search for porn on Blacked or look for some type of hotwife porn. We have had a lot of hot sex, multiple orgasms each and some hot times. At times she speaks in hypotheticals of "if we did this then......" and we explore those topics and communicate how we feel about things. She told me that she could not contain and process all this alone and she needed to talk to someone about it and one or two of her close friends. She ended up telling one of her vanilla friends and they have talked about it alot. Discussing the why's and what if you do this scenarios?
Her friend has not been real judgmental but has expressed concerns about what would happen if we pursued this fantasy in real life. I thought that she had discussed this with one friend and didn't expect that this weekend she had two other friends over to our house for the weekend and she has told both of them too. She told them that I wanted to watch her fuck other men. She told them I wanted to see her with a black man and that my favorite porn is the white wife being massaged by the big black man and him fucking her. She told me both of them weren't judgmental but I can't help but think that they are also antagonistic to this type of lifestyle.
At first it bothered me that she told these two friends who are very vanilla and actually friends she met through church. She said they asked her what she thought about it and if she had decided if she was going to do any of it. She said she told them she hadn't decided yet and wasn't sure if she was ready for that next step yet. I feel like that I was basically outed now that it is out to 3 of her friends the information will find its way to other ears. Part of that is a relief so I don't have to hide who I am but I am not sure I was ready for this many people to know my fetish and kinks. What am I to make of these events? What impact will it have now that she has told 3 friends? I have tried not to push this fantasy too hard with her but maybe I have. It is really odd knowing her 3 friends all know this about me now. I don't know if they weren't too judgmental if that makes it easier for her to want to move forward or if it matters at all. I genuinely only want her to do this if she really wants to and I tell her that often. But I can't deny how much of it is a kink to me,
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