@willsrvu ... I do not know where to start. Your reply is just eye opening to me, please do share more in future. You seem like the perfect friend I need and who can help me in this transition. as I said earlier, I have no idea what the hell I am doing.Its all happening so fast.
I will help as best I can, but as I said, you need to be certain what you want and be willing to accept whatever the outcome of your decisions is. Unfortunately, it is rare that we can make everyone happy.
He did suggested me to have sex with a black guy, Why ? because before we wanted to get serious with each other, we decided that we will experiment , and as part of experiment was that I should have sex with a black man so I will not have any regrets, but it was supposed to be a one time thing, to him and to me. The problem that came up was that I just got hooked and really enjoyed that experience and continued to had sex after that.
At first he thought that may be I wanted to get that out of the system, so he dint say anything, but when I kept on having sex with black man, he got a little frustrated, because that was not the plan. at first he tried with polite request, then with a rude comment and then finally an open intervention style that he wanted to be part of my sex life. I was at this community at that time and thats where the idea of cuckold came to me that he can participate as a cuckold.
That is the problem with experimentation, once the genie is out of the bottle it is difficult, if not impossible, to put it back in.
I understand his frustration and anger at discovering he is not capable of being everything you need and desire. Hopefully, he will come to understand and accept that he doesn't need to be as long as he is willing to support and enable you to enjoy the things he can not give you himself.
However, not every man is capable of being a loving cuckold and he may not be able to bring himself to become this for you. If that is the case, you must be willing to let him go and move on.
Also he mourns the loss of his submissive girlfriend with whom he could enjoy sex however he wished, whenever he wished. Now he must share you and he feels partly abandoned and fears losing you.
He may not be able to get over this, but if he can, he will find that the two of you will grow stronger emotionally as a couple and the sex, although it will be different, can be just as exciting and rewarding for him as well as yourself.
Yes, I do care about him and since we both want a future together even though I want to explore my sexuality more, I think it is essential that we end up to an understanding. That means if I had to work and spend time on him to make him a cuckold, I will do it.
As I said, you really have only the choices of giving up black sex and going back to the way thing were or taking control and allowing him to choose to stay as your cuckold or leave. If you want him as your cuckold, it will take a lot of effort on your part to retrain the way you think in order to become comfortable making decisions and enforcing your will.
One of you needs to be the dominant partner and if you allow him to be, you know he will forbid you to have black sex partners. Therefore, you need to assume the dominant position and take control of both your and his sexual lives. His must compliment yours and you must find ways to keep him sexually satisfied in devoting himself to your sexual pleasure.
This does not mean he gets to have orgasms every time you indulge in some form of sexual play, but that he learns to enjoy sex even when it is only you who is enjoying an orgasm. Your pleasure must become his pleasure.
Now you are right that I should take charge and put my foot down, but this is also a very big change for me. Mostly because I myself is a submissive person, I am very submissive during sex, I like to be used and I like it. So that is going to be a little difficult to adapt dominant personality for my boyfriend and make him more submissive than me.
You will still get to be the horny, little submissive slut with your black lover(s), however the price of being able to enjoy that will be making the effort to learn and dominate your boyfriend. If you wish to also keep your boyfriend, that is.
Your first lesson is this: do not argue. When you make a decision, stick to it. If he objects, do not argue, he has already agreed to submit to you and he has two options: submit to your desire or leave. You must be firm. If you are not, he will always challenge you and try to make you back down. Once you give up control, the relationship will slowly crumble.
If you are firm, eventually he will understand that it is better to do as you desire and there will be less tension.
You must control your emotions and remain calm. No raising your voice, remain quiet, calm and assertive. No matter how much he tries to get you worked up into an argument, just smile sweetly and continue calmly as you were.
Good point you raised about permission for masturbation, Next time I will make sure that he is not allowed to masturbate without my consent. I want him to be a loving and obeying cuckold and I am willing to take responsibility for training him properly.
I will be more direct in giving orders to him from now on. Some real good advices from you about not letting him masturbate, reminding him that he finishes quickly and making him eat and clean up. But I really want to try to give him oral and keep semen in my mouth and lips and kiss him immediately. I am not sure how will he take it, but if he kisses , this means I have a chance.
Ingesting his own semen is, for many men, an extremely submissive act, so this is may be a very powerful emotional moment for both of you. It may be a big step in his consciously ceding control of his sexuality to you.
For many couples, practicing male chastity can be a helpful tool in preventing the male from masturbating or having other unauthorized sexual relief. So you may may wish to consider this option as many women find that their mates become more compliant and adoring when they have control of his ability to have orgasms.
Many men who are so controlled, also claim that their orgasms are more intense when they are gifted them and that they come to enjoy the constant state of arousal that being in chastity causes, even though it is frustrating.
Overall I am really hoping that everything turns out to be okay and he becomes a submissive and obedient cuckold. I will try these things from your post and from the guide posted earlier and will share more, so you guys can correct any mistakes I make. Thanks once again for such a fantastic post and making me understand the process. Thank you and please do share more ...
I hope this, as well, for both of you as you seem to really love him. I hope he loves you equally and makes every serious effort to learn to please you and accept your dominance.
Remember: you decide, you stand firm, you do not argue.