I have been reading again my previous post on this thread. The earliest ones feel so distant. But all of them help me understand my nature. The more I fight it, the worse it is. After 6 years, I cannot believe I was that shy person anymore. Virtually any man or woman can now have me, more so if they are dark skinned, handsome, and tall, OR have deep pockets. And I love the combinations of both. As for men, old or young, fat or fit, that's not so relevant anymore. Sex has superseded my devotion for my career.