When I met my husband, I had no idea what any aspect of "the lifestyle" was all about. He educated me quickly and I realized I knew very little about what "kinky" truly involved. He had been in the LS for ten years when I met him and one night, he spun a fantasy for me during foreplay. It was one in which I fucked a BM. It TURNED me on just as he knew it would and we began discussing making it a reality. It took some time for many various reasons but it finally happened and I enjoyed it greatly. However, it also wasn't something I couldn't do without as I didn't have an orgasm and, due to my husband's abilities in bed, anyone who couldn't bring me to orgasm consistently like my husband has always been able to do, gets marked down in my book.
It took a few years before we played with another BM because we took a break to raise our children, but we dipped back into the LS about 20 years ago. Eventually, we took another trip on the BM side and got lucky with number 5! Tall, dark, handsome and I orgasmed with him regularly. Sex with him cemented in my mind, finally, that I enjoy fucking BM. For us, it's a sexual thing...all the other stuff is just background noise. We like to play with only one gentleman at a time so we, and he, can concentrate on the things all three of us are interested in pursuing with one another. That's it...those are the reasons why. Oh, and my husband participates, too; after all, he's the one with the most experience in the LS!