Wait what? This is some Y&R stuff here lol. Your ex husband is married to your current husband's ex wife?
Also, keep in mind, love takes different levels. Your love for your husband may or may not be the same as your love for your gentleman or cousins etc. There is love on a romantic level then there is love because of the relation or in general. I love my mom and my sister but not the same as I did when I loved my ex wife. I still love her, but as a person not romantically.
I'm not familiar with what Y&R stuff is.
Yes, our exes are married. We were friends before any of us were married and we remain friends to this day. We have cooperated to raise a mixed family together, living relatively close together most of the time.
When you join the military, you give up a lot of autonomy that normal people take for granted. The military runs on operations. When operations decide they need you somewhere, sometime in the next 3 hours to 30 days, they are going to have you there. They're really good at that.
Now, about 40 years ago, some deep thinker in the establishment noticed that we had service members who were married to each other. Lots of them got divorced. Lots of times this event negatively effected the service member's ability to perform their duty. So, studies were done, surveys were sent out, and it was determined that separating married service members who were used to living together greatly increased the odds that they would divorce, with all the repercussions that follow. So, policies were instigated to provide a method to try to keep married couples stationed so that they could stay together as much as possible. If you are separated from your spouse, there's forms you can fill out and the wheels will start turning to try to find a way to put you back together. This is far less important than operations, so it is done by people that aren't near as good at getting things done as operations are. And it is done with much less urgency then, say, reacting to the Russians invading your ally. In our case, it took about two years for this process to work it's way through the system...which incidentally, is about how long we would have ended up being apart anyway, as we ultimately were on similar career paths, just offset in time. It is also, in theory, longer than a human female's fertility cycle. Service members tend to be young and healthy, and at least in the USAF, it is well known that sex is a popular form of recreation.
To make a long story short, by the time that the system figured out that they had put us on the opposite side of the country from our spouses, there were other complicating factors which ultimately caused us to all decide that it was in everyone's best interest to realign things a little bit.