Fullfilled sexually, empty emotionally

Lost Princess

Lost Princess

Female
From
NC, US
IMG_7283.JPG I don't know what drew me to this site, to join, to lay my soul bare for everyone to see. Behind my beaming smile is a ton of pain and disgust with myself when ever I think back to what got me here.

My life is incredibly complex. I'm in a marriage I can barely tolerate. I have a (black) lover that has no capacity for love. I stray from my wedding vows with strangers who soil my body and ******* my soul and yet I continue to lust.

I live for the thrill, I live for the high that comes from orgasmic bliss. Yet after the final act, I am left in an even shallower shell of my former self. My soul is as empty as my once filled, overflowing pussy. Once wrapped in the arms of orgasmis rapture, now my bed is empty.

I loath the day I was introduced to the majesty of a wonderous black cock. How can something so perfect be so heart wrentchingly evil as to rip away at me until I am left empty. I feel like the young deer preyed upon and hollowed out by a predator that engorged itself on the sweetness of my former youth.

And yet, yet I crave dark skinned beasts with their Alpha-male swagger and perfectly muscular bodies and immense manhood that they wield like a weapon that taps into my very human, frail, female core and weakens my defenses with every thrust of sheer *******. What is it that allows them to degrade me and deposit their essence in me, knowing I am simply a vessel for their animalistic lust and sexual pleasure. What sorcery do they possess that pushes me to them, knowing my budding love for them will be cut short as soon as they have satiated themselves on my body. How can they return to their loved one happy and satisfied while I return to mines wretched and dirty?

And in my vile state, I dream the dreams of a wanton whore. Endless, boundless, never ending waves of black cocks wash over me and fill me until I die a most pleasurable death, and I ride a sea of cum to a distant shore where I am innocent and whole again.

That's who I am...
 
Lost Princess said:
View attachment 1052054 I don't know what drew me to this site, to join, to lay my soul bare for everyone to see. Behind my beaming smile is a ton of pain and disgust with myself when ever I think back to what got me here.

My life is incredibly complex. I'm in a marriage I can barely tolerate. I have a (black) lover that has no capacity for love. I stray from my wedding vows with strangers who soil my body and ******* my soul and yet I continue to lust.

I live for the thrill, I live for the high that comes from orgasmic bliss. Yet after the final act, I am left in an even shallower shell of my former self. My soul is as empty as my once filled, overflowing pussy. Once wrapped in the arms of orgasmis rapture, now my bed is empty.

I loath the day I was introduced to the majesty of a wonderous black cock. How can something so perfect be so heart wrentchingly evil as to rip away at me until I am left empty. I feel like the young deer preyed upon and hollowed out by a predator that engorged itself on the sweetness of my former youth.

And yet, yet I crave dark skinned beasts with their Alpha-male swagger and perfectly muscular bodies and immense manhood that they wield like a weapon that taps into my very human, frail, female core and weakens my defenses with every thrust of sheer *******. What is it that allows them to degrade me and deposit their essence in me, knowing I am simply a vessel for their animalistic lust and sexual pleasure. What sorcery do they possess that pushes me to them, knowing my budding love for them will be cut short as soon as they have satiated themselves on my body. How can they return to their loved one happy and satisfied while I return to mines wretched and dirty?

And in my vile state, I dream the dreams of a wanton whore. Endless, boundless, never ending waves of black cocks wash over me and fill me until I die a most pleasurable death, and I ride a sea of cum to a distant shore where I am innocent and whole again.

That's who I am...
Click to expand...
May I satiate my body on u?
 
Lost Princess, perfectly spoken. I am new here and can understand all too well those emotions. I believe that sometimes a persons sexual being and emotional being don't always align. I guess that is what drew me here. In my case I am an alpha white male struggling to figure out how to find a satisfying, loving relationship with someone who understands and shares my sexual side, not something that you can bring up through conventional dating.
Your post shows an inner beauty that matches your outer. I would welcome a conversation with you, you would find I have a very understanding ear.
 
Haha! That's hilarious, especially the part about baring the soul yet adding a lot of extra descriptive words and detail. Obviously BS, but interesting. It paints a picture that would make for a great series.
 
Last edited:
You
Lost Princess said:
View attachment 1052054 I don't know what drew me to this site, to join, to lay my soul bare for everyone to see. Behind my beaming smile is a ton of pain and disgust with myself when ever I think back to what got me here.

My life is incredibly complex. I'm in a marriage I can barely tolerate. I have a (black) lover that has no capacity for love. I stray from my wedding vows with strangers who soil my body and ******* my soul and yet I continue to lust.

I live for the thrill, I live for the high that comes from orgasmic bliss. Yet after the final act, I am left in an even shallower shell of my former self. My soul is as empty as my once filled, overflowing pussy. Once wrapped in the arms of orgasmis rapture, now my bed is empty.

I loath the day I was introduced to the majesty of a wonderous black cock. How can something so perfect be so heart wrentchingly evil as to rip away at me until I am left empty. I feel like the young deer preyed upon and hollowed out by a predator that engorged itself on the sweetness of my former youth.

And yet, yet I crave dark skinned beasts with their Alpha-male swagger and perfectly muscular bodies and immense manhood that they wield like a weapon that taps into my very human, frail, female core and weakens my defenses with every thrust of sheer *******. What is it that allows them to degrade me and deposit their essence in me, knowing I am simply a vessel for their animalistic lust and sexual pleasure. What sorcery do they possess that pushes me to them, knowing my budding love for them will be cut short as soon as they have satiated themselves on my body. How can they return to their loved one happy and satisfied while I return to mines wretched and dirty?

And in my vile state, I dream the dreams of a wanton whore. Endless, boundless, never ending waves of black cocks wash over me and fill me until I die a most pleasurable death, and I ride a sea of cum to a distant shore where I am innocent and whole again.

That's who I am...
Click to expand...
You are a white whore who was put here for the pleasure of the black cock
 
Lost Princess, are we to assume your husband doesn't know, or accept? What a shame. When returning to him wretched and dirty, he should put you on a pedestal at that point and show you how truly special you are. Sharing this life with your spouse makes the whole experience so much better, it enables a couple to achieve a very unique and wonderful form of intimacy seldom attained in vanilla relationships.
 
Lost Princess said:
View attachment 1052054 I don't know what drew me to this site, to join, to lay my soul bare for everyone to see. Behind my beaming smile is a ton of pain and disgust with myself when ever I think back to what got me here.

My life is incredibly complex. I'm in a marriage I can barely tolerate. I have a (black) lover that has no capacity for love. I stray from my wedding vows with strangers who soil my body and ******* my soul and yet I continue to lust.

I live for the thrill, I live for the high that comes from orgasmic bliss. Yet after the final act, I am left in an even shallower shell of my former self. My soul is as empty as my once filled, overflowing pussy. Once wrapped in the arms of orgasmis rapture, now my bed is empty.

I loath the day I was introduced to the majesty of a wonderous black cock. How can something so perfect be so heart wrentchingly evil as to rip away at me until I am left empty. I feel like the young deer preyed upon and hollowed out by a predator that engorged itself on the sweetness of my former youth.

And yet, yet I crave dark skinned beasts with their Alpha-male swagger and perfectly muscular bodies and immense manhood that they wield like a weapon that taps into my very human, frail, female core and weakens my defenses with every thrust of sheer *******. What is it that allows them to degrade me and deposit their essence in me, knowing I am simply a vessel for their animalistic lust and sexual pleasure. What sorcery do they possess that pushes me to them, knowing my budding love for them will be cut short as soon as they have satiated themselves on my body. How can they return to their loved one happy and satisfied while I return to mines wretched and dirty?

And in my vile state, I dream the dreams of a wanton whore. Endless, boundless, never ending waves of black cocks wash over me and fill me until I die a most pleasurable death, and I ride a sea of cum to a distant shore where I am innocent and whole again.

That's who I am...
Click to expand...

I think that you have managed to capture some thoughts and ideas that most (white) people on this site can relate to. There is something completely natural about our instinctive drive to submit to these black Alpha Males and yet, coming to terms with it, finding a way of reconciling our life aspirations seems to be completely at odds with it. And yet, the desire is overwhelming.. consuming..
 
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