I want to take it to the next level where with real thing and looking for suggestions.
I believe, before jumping straight from porn to the real thing, you might want to consider how many levels there are. It sounds, to me, that you might be skipping a few preparatory steps, and why it is so important to give the forum members some background.
Has she specifically SAID, or have you specifically ASKED, to take it to the next level? What were the responses?
Before you dive right into the 'real deal' the two of you should have a discussion as to the parameters ... i.e.
• condoms
• your presents
• your involvement
• location - motels or home, etc
• safe word(s) - are a way to communicate with the spouse in private to stop or slow down, etc. Don't forget this one.
And, you'll need to have these very same discussions AGAIN with the black partner the two of you have chosen. ♠+♀