Helping wife get over guilty feelings

[Naughtygators]

Anything other than basic married sex brings on challenges. Our desires also change over time. We’ve taken breaks over the years and have gone from 4some couples play to more solo, IR, and friends w benefits scenarios over the past 18yrs. Speak openly w her about your desires and what her desires are. My wife knows I get off on her play, yet I don’t push her. I would love to see her in an IR gangbang, but I know 100% that will never happen. We try and find a middle ground between my desires and hers. I’ve always been the optimist and most eager in our relationship. I do tend to remind her that we only have one life. Be happy and fuck what others think about your life’s choices!!
I’ve also found that as women get older (guys too of course) they can feel less attractive and their sexual desires can also decrease as part of the hormone changes that come w menopause. Just something to talk about.
In terms of moving forward, I’ve found that making my wife feel sexy is the biggest help. If she’s open to flirting, finding guys that can also make her feel sexy is a big plus. They are use to hearing it from their husbands. Try and get her into sexually charged situations, but w no pressure other than to just take it in or only you two will be having fun. This can include sex clubs, nude beaches or resorts, or whatever else you come across.

It still means you need to talk a lot about how you both feel. But, be patient!! Good luck.

 

[Mr&Ms TopCat]

Pre-covid, we played for around 7 years with 2-3 partners a year and a few longer term. During covid we did not play and the wife started to have guilt about our past. She is concerned about what family and friends would think of her. She feels guilty about what we did. We have always openly communicated between the two of us and we both agreed to the lifestyle. We enjoyed ourselves and it was a great part of our sex life. With this guilt, we have not been able to Re-start and not sure if we ever will. I would like to Re-start, but not unless she is 100 percent onboard, and able to overcome her feelings. In no way will I pressure her. I’d like to know if others have faced this and any tips on the best ways to over come it if possible.

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[Nickhotrod]

Once you black never go back

Very true lol

 

[Southbendcuck]

What would your wife think of her parents if she found out about their kinks? Theres a reason we do stuff behind closed doors and don't share it with family and friends.

 

[Nickhotrod]

What would your wife think of her parents if she found out about their kinks? Theres a reason we do stuff behind closed doors and don't share it with family and friends.

They would never see her again just think of all the BBC bare cock an cum she had hard to even kiss her

 

[mickle]

I agree with Report, maybe she just needs a break. I will say my wife she still feels some guilt every time we play with another man. She says she knows I am excited by it and so is she, etc, but she just feels a bit of guilt and shame. Like she is a slut. Sometimes that may not go away and you are right, your wife may never go back to those pre-covid sharing times

You just have to support her and reassure her that her being a slut is perfectly normal, I found out years ago that the more black guys that fucked her the better she felt, yes she does feel guilty occasionally and maybe shamed when a lot of guys screw her but sluts cannot change.

 

[TriciaandScott]

We have been in the lifestyle for nearly 18 years on and off and I can tell you we experienced almost exactly the same thing about 8 years ago Mandy just stopped she became terrified the ******* would find out dispute us being ultra discreet. There was a fair bit of guilt and soul searching but we still used our experiences in our sex life having fun with it but in a more fantasy and memories based way than full on participating with others. But about 2 to 3 years ago after ******* had fled the nest we both became eager to start getting into the life again more Mandy than me if I’m honest. So to cut a long story short Mandy has been seeing a Bull for two years now and apart from lockdown we are all fully enjoying this special life again more than ever. So I hope this can give you hope that it may be an evolution rather than an end. Brian

21 years off and on for us. A lot of our experiences sound like your experiences.

 

[Kippie]

Pre-covid, we played for around 7 years with 2-3 partners a year and a few longer term. During covid we did not play and the wife started to have guilt about our past. She is concerned about what family and friends would think of her. She feels guilty about what we did. We have always openly communicated between the two of us and we both agreed to the lifestyle. We enjoyed ourselves and it was a great part of our sex life. With this guilt, we have not been able to Re-start and not sure if we ever will. I would like to Re-start, but not unless she is 100 percent onboard, and able to overcome her feelings. In no way will I pressure her. I’d like to know if others have faced this and any tips on the best ways to over come it if possible.

Do you listen to The Keys and Anklets Podcast? The host talks about why women are usually reluctant to try cuckolding. 2nd or 3rd on the list is usually concern for their reputation.

I think she'll get back in a frame of mind of having desire for other men again, more so than concern about reputation, but take baby steps again and don't try to hurry things.

 

[Mypete]

Just get a few drinks in her and have a black gentleman stick a black cock in her face,and she will be right back in the groove. So many people are getting into the BBC cuckold lifestyle, don't be surprised to find out that there are other people in your own family living in the lifestyle.

 

[latino]

Thats why me and my wife keep our sexual life secret
We never do it at our home or town
We travel were we are not known
And most of the time prearranged our meeting with a complete stranger

 

[Bellaazz]

It may never happen again but at least you have some exciting experiences to remember

 

[Ted Davidson]

Thanks everyone for your comments. We are still taking our time. We do role playing when having sex and I do believe she still desires it. I have also found that she has additional concerns - STDs and the fact that the more sex partners you have the higher the risk of cervical cancer. Because of Covid, she has been much more focused on her health as well. I’m just listening to her and letting her talk about it.

 

[ironman84]

Thanks everyone for your comments. We are still taking our time. We do role playing when having sex and I do believe she still desires it. I have also found that she has additional concerns - STDs and the fact that the more sex partners you have the higher the risk of cervical cancer. Because of Covid, she has been much more focused on her health as well. I’m just listening to her and letting her talk about it.

Very open and understanding ...

 

[gigsygannon]

We have been in the lifestyle for nearly 18 years on and off and I can tell you we experienced almost exactly the same thing about 8 years ago Mandy just stopped she became terrified the ******* would find out dispute us being ultra discreet. There was a fair bit of guilt and soul searching but we still used our experiences in our sex life having fun with it but in a more fantasy and memories based way than full on participating with others. But about 2 to 3 years ago after ******* had fled the nest we both became eager to start getting into the life again more Mandy than me if I’m honest. So to cut a long story short Mandy has been seeing a Bull for two years now and apart from lockdown we are all fully enjoying this special life again more than ever. So I hope this can give you hope that it may be an evolution rather than an end. Brian

mandy is fucking hot

 

[Report]

I see you're back in the lifestyle now? Or, at least looking to get back into it. Can you speak to how she overcame these guilty feelings and worries? A lot of people in lifestyle could maybe learn a few things.

 

[Nickhotrod]

I see you're back in the lifestyle now? Or, at least looking to get back into it. Can you speak to how she overcame these guilty feelings and worries? A lot of people in lifestyle could maybe learn a few things.

BBC that's how lol always rule's

 

[Canning101]

.

@Splashgirlx ?

 

[Melenie]

With me it’s more like hubby getting over guilty feelings.

 

[Rob Johnson]

With me it’s more like hubby getting over guilty feelings.

Guilty feelings or insecurities?

 

[Splashgirlx]

@Splashgirlx ?

You don't get over them. You just deal with them.