Ok, well message the OP, he was the one that started this thread. Im curious what you need collaboration on? But Im open to listening
Cuckold Social Network
- Thread starter Neilson
- Start date
kayleeval
Male
Ideas; I mean - I don’t converse with black couples. I mean.. I could always use promotion for the app. Like.. cross platform promotion in the sense that across networks - I need the owners to promote the app within - their networks. It would be the Facebook of porn essentially. Some of the darkest stuff pertaining to the cuckhold culture would emerge if it were to be created, and mitigated so that extremists don’t get any ideas.
Wow...huh...thats interesting. I guess thats one way to cheat hard work. Yea, climb on top of the backs of other people.
Maybe if you built an app and could show it to the owners of the site, maybe they would be interested, but to ask someone else to get involved in a project that is a complete Figment of your imagination is a Big STRETCH!!
Also, why would they want to be involved, they already have a website that has thousands of users. The site is working better than your App idea, that doesnt exist? So Its just a weird message. And besides, what does that have to do with the OP's thread?
Can you stay on topic please??? Do you want to help the OP? or just make things up and see what sticks to the wall?
kayleeval
Male
I’m not even going to justify your response with a rebuttal
Dude, go away....
I agree. For a couple to go into a cuckold lifestyle, most important is that wife needs to be into the idea and let her decide on how she wants to go into it. In our experience, once she started, it was easy to continue and it is such a rich cuckolding lifestyle
Fabulous post, thank you for contributing
And you are 100% correct. I wish more men would heed your words. This LS is about women, celebrating women, empowering women, breaking the restrictions on women placed by society to act a certain way.
the role of men, either bull, stag, or cuckold is to support, love and satisfy women. Its really that simple.
The more men argue, debate, and prevent women from having fun, the more women suffer.
To me, it seems less likely for good relationships to start out based on one person's sexual fantasy. There are undoubtedly exceptions to my perspective, I'm not claiming to be an expert, it's just that cuckoldry requires a very strong relationship in order to remain stable and secure. Both husband and wife need to be very committed to each other if they're going to be able to navigate the inevitable turbulence that ethical non-monogamy introduces, ESPECIALLY one-sided non-monogamy. Some people go their whole lives without meeting someone they really click with enough to form a strong, successful and mutually beneficial long-term romantic relationship, even before you start talking about a specific sexual interest. If you narrow your search to only people who share a somewhat niche fetish, I can indeed see why it would seem difficult to find the right person.
I can only speak about my own experience, and everyone's will be different, but my wife and I definitely feel like we've learned a bit about doing this in a healthy and rewarding way. We started dating more than 20 years ago. We loved being around each other and quickly became inseparable companions. Over the years we've explored lots of different things, from having an "open relationship" to trying out the swingers scene, to dabbling in light bondage and BDSM play, to trying out harder femdom scenarios, to varying periods of increasingly strict male chastity play, etc. etc. etc. I fantasized about her fucking a hung, dominant man for ages, and she sometimes indulge me in dirty pillow talk about trying it during some of our own intimate moments, but we didn't actually try getting into cuckoldry for real until about 4 years ago or so. We grew into it naturally and organically, over time, and have found that it really works incredibly well for us, for now. I don't know if it's always what both of us will want (though it's getting harder and harder to imagine why we'd ever stop), but I DO know that the entire journey of our marriage so far has been more rewarding and fulfilling than I can possibly describe.
My advice, for what it's worth, is to find a partner you love being around, and never stop letting her know how much you love being with her. Build a strong foundation of trust and open communication, then start exploring HER fantasies. Show what a good partner you are, and she will want to explore yours as well. You may find that your interests and desires change a little bit when there's actually a partner in the equation, or perhaps you wind up compromising and find yourself exploring a mix of kinky interests, somewhere between your own fantasies and hers.
It's not all that difficult to find women who are at least open to discussing various forms of sexual exploration with partners they trust. Maybe you start by exploring bondage together, or some gentle D/s scenarios. Perhaps you discuss the possibility of a threesome or group play or something. Being open-minded to adventure can come naturally for many women, particularly if they have a solid, trusting relationship with an exciting, committed partner. Those scenarios can evolve into anything, including cuckoldry. But I could see it perhaps being more difficult to find a woman who responds positively to the discovery that a guy she just met wants her to cuckold him, or a woman who decides she wants to find a cuckold.
The condensed version of what I'm trying to say is that a cuckold is simply one particular type of life partner. So if you're seeking a cuckoldress, you're going to have to find a woman who is seeking a life partner. I personally feel like limiting that search to "women who also want to find a cuckold" is going to exponentially decrease your chances of success. I think you have better odds of finding a great partner who gradually becomes open to the idea of cuckolding her partner because she loves him and feels safe exploring things like this with him. But either way, I wish you the best of luck.
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franklyn17
Male
I agree think my wife would benefit
love the posts here .. and I think a cuckold network sort of thing is a superb idea .
When i fist found out I was a cuck i found it very difficult to deal with , even after i had accepted it and resolved to support wife on this it was not always easy and i found talking to others was so helpful . Initially the biggest thing was realising that you are not alone in this , but as the years go on getting other peoples experiences and relating them to your own is very enlightening and helps in development too . It was anotehr cuck who first told me about this site .
Being able to help others who struggle with it is a great thing , as it also helps your own angst to do it
When i fist found out I was a cuck i found it very difficult to deal with , even after i had accepted it and resolved to support wife on this it was not always easy and i found talking to others was so helpful . Initially the biggest thing was realising that you are not alone in this , but as the years go on getting other peoples experiences and relating them to your own is very enlightening and helps in development too . It was anotehr cuck who first told me about this site .
Being able to help others who struggle with it is a great thing , as it also helps your own angst to do it
I just noticed this thread for the first time tonight. Apologies for jumping in mid-conversation to discuss comments that were made made several pages/weeks ago, but I just wanted to briefly touch on this comment:
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think you meant to imply you want to be "strong enough to encourage her," but "weak enough to be submissive to her and her lover." I think you probably want to be "strong enough to encourage her," but also "strong enough to allow her complete sexual freedom, secure enough to know she loves you for it and isn't going anywhere, and confident enough to celebrate her sexual liberation and satisfaction with her." The submissive part takes strength, too. You need to be strong enough to handle whatever your Dom(me) dictates, have enough trust to explore pushing some of your limits, knowing she'll make sure you can handle it. You need to be disciplined and committed enough to make dominating you a rewarding experience, and not something you convince her to do out of pity.
It probably sounds like I'm saying you have a lot further to go, becoming "strong enough," but that's not really my point. I think once people can see the value and strength a good cuck provides, it becomes easier to shed the shame and self-doubt holding you back. Do I have a 9-inch cock and enough stamina to drill my wife with it for hours on end? Nope. But do I offer her freedom and fulfillment the majority of her girlfriends will never come close to experiencing? You better believe it. I'm not a bull, but I put effort into being the best husband, co-parent and partner I can be. I strive to make my wife happy in every way I can. I am a creative romantic, a diligent searcher and screener of her potential playmates, a facilitator of safe environments for her to explore and nurture her sexuality, and I support her every step of the way. I'm far from perfect, and am susceptible to a bit of cuckold angst and jealousy from time to time, but I trust her to care about me and we work through it as a couple. So there is effort involved, but I think more often than not, if you asked my wife if being in a cuckold marriage is difficult for her, she would tell you that doing it is a no-brainer. She gets to have a supportive and happy marriage, and all the toe-curling, naughty, primal, sheet-soaking, deep fucking she can handle. I get challenged to be a good sub, her bulls get hot sex from a happy, sexy woman and the support (and often real friendship) of her husband, and everybody wins.
Maybe it's not what you meant to imply anyway, so I'll try not to belabor this a lot further. I just don't think it takes finding something other than strength to be a good cuckold or submissive. Wanting to be a your wife's cuckold doesn't make you weak. It takes character to make her pleasure and happiness your top priority. It takes devotion to decide that she deserves to experience the most Earth-shattering sex she possibly can have. It takes strength to admit that another man might be better suited to helping her experience that sometimes. When you know all this to be true, you can let yourself be proud of what you bring to the table, instead of ashamed and full of crippling self doubt. When you see the value of what you can be for your wife, and show real commitment to becoming that, I think she'll see that value in you as well, and you can break out of the cycle of self-defeating emotions. Don't worry that you can't satisfy her, and wind up trying to convince her to look outside your marriage to be happy. Show her your marriage offers her the world, including the kind of stability that makes it possible for her to seek completely satisfying sexual experiences, and that you will be right there to share them with her. Be the cuck your Queen deserves, and be proud of who you become for her.
I see this sentiment a lot. It seems that many (if not most) people assume that cuckolds are weak. I don't believe they are. At least not the happy ones. So I don't know if I agree that "balance" between strength and something else is what you should be looking for. I think you will be better served by going all-in on getting stronger and more secure.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think you meant to imply you want to be "strong enough to encourage her," but "weak enough to be submissive to her and her lover." I think you probably want to be "strong enough to encourage her," but also "strong enough to allow her complete sexual freedom, secure enough to know she loves you for it and isn't going anywhere, and confident enough to celebrate her sexual liberation and satisfaction with her." The submissive part takes strength, too. You need to be strong enough to handle whatever your Dom(me) dictates, have enough trust to explore pushing some of your limits, knowing she'll make sure you can handle it. You need to be disciplined and committed enough to make dominating you a rewarding experience, and not something you convince her to do out of pity.
It probably sounds like I'm saying you have a lot further to go, becoming "strong enough," but that's not really my point. I think once people can see the value and strength a good cuck provides, it becomes easier to shed the shame and self-doubt holding you back. Do I have a 9-inch cock and enough stamina to drill my wife with it for hours on end? Nope. But do I offer her freedom and fulfillment the majority of her girlfriends will never come close to experiencing? You better believe it. I'm not a bull, but I put effort into being the best husband, co-parent and partner I can be. I strive to make my wife happy in every way I can. I am a creative romantic, a diligent searcher and screener of her potential playmates, a facilitator of safe environments for her to explore and nurture her sexuality, and I support her every step of the way. I'm far from perfect, and am susceptible to a bit of cuckold angst and jealousy from time to time, but I trust her to care about me and we work through it as a couple. So there is effort involved, but I think more often than not, if you asked my wife if being in a cuckold marriage is difficult for her, she would tell you that doing it is a no-brainer. She gets to have a supportive and happy marriage, and all the toe-curling, naughty, primal, sheet-soaking, deep fucking she can handle. I get challenged to be a good sub, her bulls get hot sex from a happy, sexy woman and the support (and often real friendship) of her husband, and everybody wins.
Maybe it's not what you meant to imply anyway, so I'll try not to belabor this a lot further. I just don't think it takes finding something other than strength to be a good cuckold or submissive. Wanting to be a your wife's cuckold doesn't make you weak. It takes character to make her pleasure and happiness your top priority. It takes devotion to decide that she deserves to experience the most Earth-shattering sex she possibly can have. It takes strength to admit that another man might be better suited to helping her experience that sometimes. When you know all this to be true, you can let yourself be proud of what you bring to the table, instead of ashamed and full of crippling self doubt. When you see the value of what you can be for your wife, and show real commitment to becoming that, I think she'll see that value in you as well, and you can break out of the cycle of self-defeating emotions. Don't worry that you can't satisfy her, and wind up trying to convince her to look outside your marriage to be happy. Show her your marriage offers her the world, including the kind of stability that makes it possible for her to seek completely satisfying sexual experiences, and that you will be right there to share them with her. Be the cuck your Queen deserves, and be proud of who you become for her.
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That is a lovely post and I empathise with so much of what you say there ... not always easy top get to that state , though !
The way i look at it sometimes these days , is I am not that much good at wallpapering either , so we get someone in who knows what they are doing ! lol
Hahaha! I used to tell people I've never pretended to be better at football than a professional player, and I've never felt ashamed to admit they're better at the sport than I am. If we want the best for our wives, why would we limit them to anything less than the best of the best? My wife says her current regular bull is an "olympian of sex," and has on occasion thanked him for his "olympic level fucking," after a particularly good performance. Am a very attentive lover but I'm not a born olympian.
But I actually love your wallpaper analogy, too! We're doing some major renovations on our home right now. A lot of the little things we're paying to have done are technically things I could probably muddle my way through, but sometimes you just want something done right the first time, with a certain level of efficiency, proficiency and professionalism. No shame in sticking to what you're good at, and giving credit where it's due when someone's better at something else.
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As I read and learn more about what i feel it would take to be a good cuckold I would agree the cuckold should demonstrate enough strength to their wife’s in order for them to feel secure enough to be able to move toward. If the cuckold does not or is not able to show their wife’s they desire this the wife may not feel comfortable to then see others. When I first brought Nancy seeing others her first comments was she thought I wanted another women, nothing could be further from the truth.
I do find there is some level of control when being submissive as providing pleasure to another is fulfilling to me. It is then when I feel my pleasure. Hopefully that makes sense. I value the exchange of ideas but would really like to read more about cuckoldng to get a better understanding of the dynamics involved especially from the wife’s point of view. Thanks!.
I agree, but I also think a lot of men feel they have to convince their wives, "honey, don't worry, I really do want this for you! I'm being selfless here!" I think men often don't realize that what they're suggesting may not be the thing their wives need to hear in the moment. I think it's often the case that a lady needs assurance that her husband is really interested in what it is that she wants or needs, rather than to be convinced that her husband really does want her to fuck other people.
This seems to be quite common, actually. I'm not sure what men could change about their approach that might help dispel that misunderstanding more quickly, but I've heard stories on countless podcasts and read countless blog posts from lifestyle women and couples, where it was the man's idea to approach his wife about some form of extramarital play, and her first thought was, "oh, no! My husband wants to be with other women!"
My wife and I were fortunate in that our relationship was "open" from the very beginning, so I never had to try to convince my wife if anything. In fact, before we started experimenting with chastity play, we hit a stretch where my wife had a lot going on in life that affected her libido, and I was the one taking more advantage of the freedom to be with others. It was largely unfulfilling for me, but I was a club DJ and spent long nights out on the town, so my wife encouraged me to take advantage of my time so I wouldn't be frustrated by the lack of sex at home (though she did keep me locked up for a lot of that time. Chastity became a way for her to be involved in my sex life even when she didn't have a lot of bandwidth or energy for actual sex). So when she eventually found herself ready for a bit of a sexual awakening, needless to say, our closeness and intimacy drastically improved. How she wanted to increase her play was the natural direction for our conversation to go, because she was basically starting over at next to zero. So I had it a little easier than a lot of people, because she had absolutely no reason to question my intention when I would ask her if she wanted to try looking for other partners. She told me what she wanted to try next, I added it to our online dating site profiles, and started finding people and social events I thought might interest her. I was loving every little new step that brought my wife joy or pleasure, and directly benefiting from every little increase in her confidence and libido, in the form of more intense play with her. Since we were already playing with femdom and chastity themes, cuckoldry was a pretty natural next step for intensifying our play as a couple, while simultaneously broadening her horizons and maximizing her opportunities.
I love trying to offer support and advice for men who say they are hoping for a similar situation to ours, but ours was one of those rare cases where the man didn't really have to do a lot of convincing his wife to try things. I just tried to be as loving and supportive as possible during the times when she wasn't ready, pay as much attention to her needs and her enjoyment whenever there was an opportunity for intimacy, and encourage her to let me help provide it, whenever she expressed a desire to add something new to the mix. So, on one hand, my experience may not be as immediately helpful to men asking "how did you get your wife to cuckold you?" But on the other hand, I do think some of the same ideas are definitely applicable. My wife and I have been through years-long periods that required me to have a ton of patience, for example. Being patient and understanding is something I think ALL supportive partners need to learn. When you can recognize that people may go through multiple phases in response to external factors, that sex lives evolve and desires shift over time, it becomes clear how important it is to show your partner as much compassion and support as possible, rather than frustration about what it feels like you're missing. Don't get me wrong, I am not always naturally good at that myself, and have had more than my share of selfish tantrums, but what I often realized is that whatever factors were blocking my wife's libido and desire to branch out were usually things she was even more frustrated with than I was, and she needed support and understanding from me in order to work through those patches in a healthy way.
A lot of men seem to think, "my wife would be happier if she'd try having more sex," and they might even be correct, but I think it's common that whatever is making a woman unhappy is probably contributing to her lack of desire, her willingness to explore, and her prioritization of sex in general. It could be that working on making her happy and more confident will lead to more sex, and not the other way around. I think if more men had these conversations with their wives and REALLY LISTENED to their responses, they'd find that being sexually closed off is a symptom, and not the problem that needs to be directly addressed.
So yes, my situation may look different from those of a lot of men who are struggling to make changes in their relationships, but I do think that concepts like prioritizing deep and open communication, working on effectively listening to your partner, trying to limit your emotional response to frustrations and looking for the actual root cause, and practicing the ability to show love and support through any situation your partner is in, I believe those things really can help just about everyone.
It makes perfect sense. If you're not already familiar, look up the word compersion. I get a huge amount of sexual gratification from seeing my partner experience pleasure. I've had orgasms while fully caged, with no direct contact of my genitalia at all, by connecting with my wife and experiencing her orgasms with her. They're rare, but those are the most powerful orgasms I can recall. One of the greatest benefits of long-term chastity play comes when you've been locked up long enough that you're not even thinking "I hope she might unlock me tonight," anymore, and the end goal of any sexual experience truly shifts completely to your wife's pleasure and not yours.
But even outside of chastity play, an absolutely huge part of my sexual self-worth comes from feeling like I've given my wife pleasure. It's been interesting and sometimes difficult learning to feel real value in providing or contributing to her pleasure indirectly, especially when my touch isn't what's required.
We've had periods where my wife's body chemistry and the balance of her microbiome were very delicate, and she was reluctant to allow me even to perform oral sex on her, for fear that it might bring about another full-blown yeast infection that she'd barely been keeping at bay. The self-doubt I had to combat during those periods was at least as intense as any I've ever felt from things like realizing she really does prefer bigger dicks than the one I'll have for the rest of my life, or that her lovers really are touching her in ways and stimulating places inside her that I will never reach. I was able to deal with all of that better than times when I'm not able to at least give her orgasms from oral or manual stimulation. I constantly have to reassess what it actually means to be a good submissive or even a good partner, because my desire to see and help her get off is extremely strong, and there are MANY times when that's just not what she needs from me in the given moment.
I do too. I have work to do at the moment and need to wrap this up, but I am more than happy to share some links to some great blogs, podcasts, and books later, if anyone is interested. I'm also keen to see where this social network idea may lead. My wife is in an invite-only Kik group for cuckoldresses, and it's wonderful the support, advice and ideas those ladies are able to share with each other.
Also, that reminds me, @Neilson , in addition to constantly hijacking your thread with long-form brain dumps and pontifications, I keep meaning to ask you if you wouldn't mind adding me to any communications about the network you're creating. Thank you for getting this discussion started.
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One quick addendum:
I apologize, everyone. I have severe ADD, and when a thread has as much real, valuable discussion as this one does, I am compelled to write paragraphs in response to almost every sentence I read. I get hopelessly distracted, and forget to say things like:
Thank you @hungteacher , for taking the time to share so much great insight and helpful advice. I love everything you've written here. The reason I haven't quoted a single one of your posts is that even being my annoyingly overly-verbose self, I nothing productive to add to the things you're saying beautifully. Almost every one of your posts is gold, and if more people (especially cuck hopefuls and men who intentionally or unintentionally try to pimp out their wives and call it cuckoldry or hotwifing) would take some of your advice to heart, these forums and the lifestyle as a whole would be much better places. Your patience and experience are invaluable and appreciated.
or:
I truly am sorry, everyone, for my total inability to stay on topic and be more concise. I'm just some cuckold with a smart phone and laptop. I can't afford the editor (or therapist) I wish I could hire!
Seriously, I don't mean to inflict abusive walls of text on everyone. I hope my contributions are net positive overall. I know I'm annoying, but I do try to be at least as helpful and/or entertaining as I am obnoxious.
I apologize, everyone. I have severe ADD, and when a thread has as much real, valuable discussion as this one does, I am compelled to write paragraphs in response to almost every sentence I read. I get hopelessly distracted, and forget to say things like:
Thank you @hungteacher , for taking the time to share so much great insight and helpful advice. I love everything you've written here. The reason I haven't quoted a single one of your posts is that even being my annoyingly overly-verbose self, I nothing productive to add to the things you're saying beautifully. Almost every one of your posts is gold, and if more people (especially cuck hopefuls and men who intentionally or unintentionally try to pimp out their wives and call it cuckoldry or hotwifing) would take some of your advice to heart, these forums and the lifestyle as a whole would be much better places. Your patience and experience are invaluable and appreciated.
or:
I truly am sorry, everyone, for my total inability to stay on topic and be more concise. I'm just some cuckold with a smart phone and laptop. I can't afford the editor (or therapist) I wish I could hire!
Seriously, I don't mean to inflict abusive walls of text on everyone. I hope my contributions are net positive overall. I know I'm annoying, but I do try to be at least as helpful and/or entertaining as I am obnoxious.
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Yes I fall under the definition of compersion as I feel totally un full filled as I am not able to satisfy her sexually on my own nor able to watch. I am a fast cummer and a bit on the small side.
I love the look of most women (especially ones with glasses) but have no desire to be with another as I will not able to please them either and remain true to my wife.
Thanks for sharing your journey and I am happy for you and your wife.
I also agree on all the help and guidance given by others as it does help me understand the many steps it can take to the wife to get comfortable if ever.
But I do enjoy the journey and look forward to each and every step we take together.
Some great posts recently.
I was definitely guilty of pushing my wife in a way that in retrospect I am not comfortable with. She always had a very strong libido so in a way I was pushing on an open door but I definitely didn't approach correctly.
We were in our mid/late 40s by the time she shrugged her shoulders and acquiesced but it took a chance meeting with a particular bull for things to click on place for her. He literally explained her fantasies to her within minutes of meeting - the look on her face was absolutely priceless.
As her husband that's really where my challenges began as the bull became more than a cock for the night.
She is now regularly disciplined physically and mentally which is something I would not be able to provide, just as I would not be able to provide the environment to treat her like a whore. It's just not something in me.
I still have regular wtf?! Moments but the positive change in her is absolutely clear to see and make sense of many of the issues we have had in our long relationship.
I was definitely guilty of pushing my wife in a way that in retrospect I am not comfortable with. She always had a very strong libido so in a way I was pushing on an open door but I definitely didn't approach correctly.
We were in our mid/late 40s by the time she shrugged her shoulders and acquiesced but it took a chance meeting with a particular bull for things to click on place for her. He literally explained her fantasies to her within minutes of meeting - the look on her face was absolutely priceless.
As her husband that's really where my challenges began as the bull became more than a cock for the night.
She is now regularly disciplined physically and mentally which is something I would not be able to provide, just as I would not be able to provide the environment to treat her like a whore. It's just not something in me.
I still have regular wtf?! Moments but the positive change in her is absolutely clear to see and make sense of many of the issues we have had in our long relationship.
Please send me a PM on here and we can discuss
I would love a copy of the book if possible
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