Use a "pretty" reliable method of birth control, like getting a diaphragm. It's a pain sometimes because you need to stop in the bathroom, which is an interruption. But, it's about 90% effective, so while you probably won't get pregnant, it is possible. That small risk might be enough to excite all three of you. Are you happy with the small risk idea? Don't be shocked if you black bull tries to sweet talk you into going bare. If you're really submissive or impulsive, don't be surprised, if you let him. I think most of us at some point let a guy go inside bare without birth control and trusted him and got burned because he couldn't help it because "felt too good". You might be older now, but guys still have a hard time pulling out.