unsure of how to proceed!!!

[VoyeurWhiteMale]

...My husband and I have been married for 28 1/2 years...

...I'm trying to deal with the thought that marriage was an institution that my husband and I entered into to be as one. We took vows, we committed ourselves to be with one another till death do us part....

None of us is the same person as we were in our young days, all people evolve...change...mature. Life's small, enjoy it your way. It's easy for me to say that because I'm not into religion but I also know it's true, life is small and we should make it simple instead of overcomplicating it. I also believe in trying something at least once if you are curious about it, it's the only way to know if it's right or wrong for you.

 

[Hotwife4u2njoy]

Hi to you both,
I have not read other responses but i felt the need to say this......
Those with the highest morals on such topics really do tend to be the biggest hypocrites. The church in all its sectors have produced far too many sexual scandals, so just imagine how much goes on that never becomes common knowledge.
The biggest reason for divorce is women cheating. Sadly this happens far easier than women exploring and sharing with their husband an alternative lifestyle like cuckolding.
Do yourselves a favour and don't withold what you both crave for the sake of morality.
Morality will not do You guys any favours, so try to overcome and not to bow to it. You do not deserve to limit yourselves from so much adventure and enjoyment. Together.
Best of luck to you both, I sincerely mean that.

Thank you

 

[Hotwife4u2njoy]

None of us is the same person as we were in our young days, all people evolve...change...mature. Life's small, enjoy it your way. It's easy for me to say that because I'm not into religion but I also know it's true, life is small and we should make it simple instead of overcomplicating it. I also believe in trying something at least once if you are curious about it, it's the only way to know if it's right or wrong for you.

Thank you

 

[Funwife2022]

Thank you

Hi want to chat

 

[UK Black Bull]

Hi and welcome
Just take one step at a time and do not just rush in, And more importantly Both of you need to be on the same page and make any ground rules right up front and most of all try and be open to each other likes dislikes, how far you each want to take this etc and be supportive at all times if she says no it's no etc.
Just give her time and space and she will come round when she is good and ready and trust me the sex will be so much better for everyone

 

[Blackdoghawaii]

Get verified you sound like a white boi a very Lame white boi….

 

[Cuckold37ja]

my opinion: don't delay the fantasy, the life is too short.

 

[Hotwife4u2njoy]

Get verified you sound like a white boi a very Lame white boi….

Hi, thanks for the advice. Not sure why you have to be disrespectful when you have no idea who we are. We are a married couple, been married since June 1993. People like you who comment as you do as well as the others who have sent us private messages that were very disrespectful and one was down right nasty, are part of the reason that makes coming into this lifestyle hard. Why would any woman want to open herself to someone with character such as yours? Maybe it's the easiest way for you to feel like a Dominant man.....unfortunately it does not come across that way. We pray that karma is nice to you.....

 

[Hotwife4u2njoy]

my opinion: don't delay the fantasy, the life is too short.

Lol, we here ya, however we'd rather discuss this and make sure it's agreed upon and desired by us both.....then we wont delay it any further!!! Thanks for the input!

 

[Hotwife4u2njoy]

Hi and welcome
Just take one step at a time and do not just rush in, And more importantly Both of you need to be on the same page and make any ground rules right up front and most of all try and be open to each other likes dislikes, how far you each want to take this etc and be supportive at all times if she says no it's no etc.
Just give her time and space and she will come round when she is good and ready and trust me the sex will be so much better for everyone

Thank you. We have been discussing this for close to 3 years now and neither one of us want to rush into anything. We both agree that it is a desirable fantasy and wanted to get input from others who have "been there and done that". Neither one of us have thought we could bring this up with any of our friends as we would not be sure what their reaction is as they may not share the same thoughts on this type of a subject as we do. It's what brought us to this forum. Thanks again for your input and suggestions.

 

[Hotwife4u2njoy]

Hi to you both,
I have not read other responses but i felt the need to say this......
Those with the highest morals on such topics really do tend to be the biggest hypocrites. The church in all its sectors have produced far too many sexual scandals, so just imagine how much goes on that never becomes common knowledge.
The biggest reason for divorce is women cheating. Sadly this happens far easier than women exploring and sharing with their husband an alternative lifestyle like cuckolding.
Do yourselves a favour and don't withold what you both crave for the sake of morality.
Morality will not do You guys any favours, so try to overcome and not to bow to it. You do not deserve to limit yourselves from so much adventure and enjoyment. Together.
Best of luck to you both, I sincerely mean that.

Thank you soo much for your input. We really appreciate it.

 

[Hotwife4u2njoy]

I think there is one or more sites we have seen called "Christian Swingers" or something like that. I am sure you could drop in one of those and just bounce these conflicting desires there. Someone there I'm sure would help you resolve this dilema. Good luck!

Thank you for the input.

 

[James Moody]

You're going to love it...I can tell. Good luck and enjoy!!

 

[BBCinvancouver]

Hi, we are a married couple who have been talking about a fantasy we both share of which my wife either has sex with another man and I watch or join making it a 3some. I really want to see her with a BBC, a whole other fantasy of mine!!! We are not sure if this will transpire or not, as the last hurdle is one of morality. We both have Christian beliefs, however I'm in no way as religious as she is nor her fathers side of the family. My wife is reluctant as she just feels that it is immoral for her to have sex with anyone other than me as she is my wife, and feels it is immoral for me to desire sharing her with another man. I just don't know how to say what I feel which is we are both adults, married, and therefore we should be able to discuss and do whatever we both agree to, not matter what others may think. Our personal married life is only our business, not others, unless we choose to invite them into it. I guess what we are looking for is advice or insight on what others have done, if they had to overcome a morality issue on either partners part. My wife is in no way a prude, however she has only been sexual with 4 men, 2 high school boyfriends, her first husband, and now me. We want to thank you in advance for any input or advice.

EDIT: Hello, this is Shawn, my husband and I chose to post here looking for help with a moral dilemma I have as we discuss this fantasy that I shared with my husband many many years ago and it has been a serious topic of discussion for us for almost 3 years now. Please do not assume that my husband is in any way pressuring me to do this. We both choose to discuss this, as well as many other fantasies or desires we have, and make decisions as to take them from fantasy/desire to reality or not. We both share this fantasy, my husband being more so wanting to watch me than join me and another man. It has been discussed and we both have agreed that if we do choose to proceed, we are going to explore my husband watching me with another man, and will do so until we decide it is time to take it to the next level.

As we were reading my edit prior to saving it, I asked my husband if I was just overthinking the morality of this situation. We have discussed and shared so many fantasies and desires leading up to this point some we have chosen to leave as fantasies/desires, some we have chosen to pursue, all in reality to some other person would absolutely be immoral. Each individual person does have their own morals and beliefs and therefor what makes ones morals and beliefs right and anothers wrong? Hmmmmm..... Thanks again to all of the people who have replied and offered their thoughts, beliefs, experiences, etc.

Thank you,
Hopeful yet unsure!

I'd say: take it slow.

 

[BBCinvancouver]

Thank you

I'd also say post recent pics from at least the last decade and get verified.

 

[ErikaG]

View attachment 4449888

i would luv to have it

 

[Rzrbackgirl116]

Thank you for the reply however it does seem judgmental as you really do not know much of the details of our relationship nor communications status between us yet you formed and opinion which we are thankful for you sharing. My husband and I have been married for 28 1/2 years and we have always shared our fantasies with each other, some of which we have chose to take from fantasy to reality. I have always fantasized about what it would be like and feel like to be with two men at the same time. We have played with toys and simulated mfm 3somes with suction cup toys. I have never really enjoyed the feeling of toys, some over $100. still are not the real thing and my husband knows this and has often suggested we could replace the toys with the real thing.

Upon more discussion, it turned from the idea of a 3some, to my husband watching me with another man. This topic alone we have been discussing for almost 3 years, and have worked out the majority of concerns either of us have had, except the moral issue we brought up here. I know my husband would be comfortable with this as he is not a jealous person at all because of the trust he has in me and how he knows who I am. I have been a Lingerie Model at several small town bars outside of our local town, I have been on a biker calendar, all supported by my husband. I know he is proud of how I look, even though I do not feel I'm special, just an average woman. Throughout our discussions we have finally decided to try joining online communities, such as this one, to see if others have had the same "moral dilemma" as we have and if so have they resolved that dilemma, have they accepted that their morals are their beliefs and they accepted that and moved on....we are looking for input from others that have "been there, done that".

I honestly do not believe that, if we choose to proceed and actually fulfill this fantasy, it will be a problem in any of the factors you had stated in your reply, with the exception that I may enjoy it and want to try more with my husband. If we do try it, and the actual experience is one that I had and just did not care to do it again, we would end it there. Such has been the case with other sexual fantasies that we had shared, discussed, tried, and after the experience he or I chose to leave at that. Having sex in the back of a taxi cab was such an example.

Please forgive me if I'm also being accusatory by saying you appear to be judgmental. My husband nor myself want to offend or upset anyone, we are just here to try and learn.

I guess I see the response completely different than you. However, have battled with the same issue of religious morals vs seeking experience and fun for both of us.

I relate to the reply of “I wouldn't pressure her if I were in your shoes. Not judging or anything but sounds like you're doing it more for yourself than for her or you as a couple” after reading your husbands part. I’m not being judgmental at all. Afterall, I’ve been in your shoes with issue you’re seeking advice on. I feel he was only saying “don’t pressure her” because it’s your religious morals that have to be dealt with, and only you can deal with those and decide what’s best for you. Not saying your husband doesn’t have the best interest for you. But we all have the natural instinct to be “self focused” at times. I truly felt the reply was a friendly reminder to keep your best interest at heart and not rush you into a decision you’ll later regret in attempt to make him happy alone.

I found myself wanting to seek excitement that’s not fully fulfilled with just my husband and myself, yet not going against what I feel God would “frown” on. I personally have come to the conclusion that I don’t and will never fulfill a “sinless” or perfect life ever no matter how much I try. But I CAN make both of us happy by branching out of my comfort zone, and make it less likely for there to be unfaithfulness due to dullness or boredom. Afterall most unfaithfulness is rooted from someone looking or seeking “something different.” I chose to seek it with my husband and enjoy it together. Life is too short to live a cookie cutter lifestyle in my opinion.

I wish you the best with finding out what makes you both happy. If you choose to commit to this lifestyle you definitely will enjoy it!

 

[Khrises4u]

Morality is deeply personal. Asking others to unlock your moral code is rarely successful. Every single one of us come at it from a different perspective even if you may have the same religious beliefs.

If this has been "discussed" for 3 years, there's really not much changing, and I suspect either someone's stalling, not being as honest between yourselves as you think, or anxious/fearful of taking a risk.

I promise God will not strike you down.

If the two of you are aligned and both wanna do it....uhm....then do it. Pretty simple. Marriage is a bond of two people that love and trust one another and you guys get to make the rules together what you do with that love and trust....

Relax, don't overthink it, and have fun....

 

[robbiewillsuck]

I will chat with you and give you my past experiences - yes I would do it over again and alot more. You need to talk more and talk smut doing sex.

 

[marco vittoro]

Hi, we are a married couple who have been talking about a fantasy we both share of which my wife either has sex with another man and I watch or join making it a 3some. I really want to see her with a BBC, a whole other fantasy of mine!!! We are not sure if this will transpire or not, as the last hurdle is one of morality. We both have Christian beliefs, however I'm in no way as religious as she is nor her fathers side of the family. My wife is reluctant as she just feels that it is immoral for her to have sex with anyone other than me as she is my wife, and feels it is immoral for me to desire sharing her with another man. I just don't know how to say what I feel which is we are both adults, married, and therefore we should be able to discuss and do whatever we both agree to, not matter what others may think. Our personal married life is only our business, not others, unless we choose to invite them into it. I guess what we are looking for is advice or insight on what others have done, if they had to overcome a morality issue on either partners part. My wife is in no way a prude, however she has only been sexual with 4 men, 2 high school boyfriends, her first husband, and now me. We want to thank you in advance for any input or advice.

EDIT: Hello, this is Shawn, my husband and I chose to post here looking for help with a moral dilemma I have as we discuss this fantasy that I shared with my husband many many years ago and it has been a serious topic of discussion for us for almost 3 years now. Please do not assume that my husband is in any way pressuring me to do this. We both choose to discuss this, as well as many other fantasies or desires we have, and make decisions as to take them from fantasy/desire to reality or not. We both share this fantasy, my husband being more so wanting to watch me than join me and another man. It has been discussed and we both have agreed that if we do choose to proceed, we are going to explore my husband watching me with another man, and will do so until we decide it is time to take it to the next level.

As we were reading my edit prior to saving it, I asked my husband if I was just overthinking the morality of this situation. We have discussed and shared so many fantasies and desires leading up to this point some we have chosen to leave as fantasies/desires, some we have chosen to pursue, all in reality to some other person would absolutely be immoral. Each individual person does have their own morals and beliefs and therefor what makes ones morals and beliefs right and anothers wrong? Hmmmmm..... Thanks again to all of the people who have replied and offered their thoughts, beliefs, experiences, etc.

Thank you,
Hopeful yet unsure!

Hi there. This is Alyssa. I'm using my hubby's log-in. Your morals are your business and no one else's. What you want to explore is also your business. If this is what you want to try, then try it. You don't have to apologize for anything to anyone. I come from an evangelical background, so I know all about the BS. Most of the people who would judge you are hypocrites and cowards! You do you. My husband learned what I was hiding, then he set up. I'd never have had the moral courage to explore it and myself if he hadn't. I'm forever thankful that he had the courage and strength of character to do that for me. It was a truly selfless act of love.
You and your husband should have a real heart-to-heart. If this is something you want to do, then do it! Don't let anyone else tell you otherwise. Communicate clearly. This is YOUR life and YOUR marriage. Explore it and enjoy it. That is my feelings.
Oh, and when I decided to tell him i was pregnant, I gave my ******* an ultimatum. He didn't like it, but had to deal with it. Especially since my mom, and his current wife also BOTH got on him about being a hypocrite too.