Take her to some college basketball games, for example, the game's over and everybody is leaving, and my wife is motionless, gazing at the players wiping the sweat off their bodies. Feed her stimuli. When she is watching a sexy black man on TV, sitting with her legs wide apart, feet on the couch, and her fingers caressing an exact spot on her panties, quietly enjoy her moment. You'll know for sure she is thinking those things she won't admit to.