For starters, I'm not a "cuck" and my wife would have a hard time moving in that direction as my very much alpha (and my dick size is plenty at just a hair under 8"), so for us, she's what I would call a Hot Wife, as she has my full approval and support, but that said, I don't know what the issue is with some folks. I would "love" to meet in person, but for me (highly extraverted), the meeting in person is just getting to know someone new and I'd have no probs buying a few rounds and/or getting together a few times to meet and chat about the lifestyle and even to just get to know someone. But then again, that's me......
I think in the 'cuck' situation, there's the initial fantasy, but then there's the whole downward spiral of humiliation and possibly not ever engaging in sex with you wife again. When that reality sets in with a few people, I think they balk. That's the opposite of the Hot Wife who has the husbands support and approval and there's no humiliation, etc. So perhaps people are mixing the terms up (much like people mix up a MFM with a MMF and think it's the same thing - uhhhh no it's not!)
I also think there's far too many fakes on this site (and other sites). I wish I could "validate" (I even took all the photos to validate, but then read the rules and didn't qualify) as a real non-black male, but the site doesn't allow it. I think if it did ******* validation of all members, you'd see the flakes drop off nearly overnight.