Worried

I'm shocked that none of the guys on this forum have asked to meet your *******.

Be glad that they're wise enough not to ask. With the mom being 35 (assuming that she didn't first get married until she was in her 20's), and the oldest ******* being high school age, safe bet that the girl isn't of legal age.
 
At school, she is called names and they all talk ******* about her. Some of the girls even gang up and get into fight with her. She lost most of her friends. The area is changing slowly so it is more mixed but when you have mostly white community with a slowly growing black population there is a lot of turmoil.

Hi Kandi.. I don't have children and because of that, I'm probably not someone who can give good advice concerning your *******, but my advice is for you to stay. Someone else has already mentioned that running from a problem doesn't send a very good message to your children and I totally agree with that. Another reason why I say you should stay is that you mentioned that the area is changing and is getting more mixed and if this is happening, I can only assume that you will soon see more and more white girls (and also adult white women) dating black men in the near future and with that happening, it's likely that there will be less and less harassment and bullying in the school. My black boyfriends nephew is in a school where only a few years ago there wasn't hardly any white girls dating black boys but once a few of them started doing so, it took off like wildfire and now it seems as if more than half the high school white girls are dating black.. I know this because we go to watch him play football often and see it first hand.. and yes, he has a gorgeous white girlfriend himself.

I can understand how difficult it must be for your ******* at this time but with your continued support, you are developing a strong woman who is learning to stand up for who she really is. "No-one" should be able to dictate who you want to date or not date. Even if she went back to dating white boys now, she would still be harassed for her past choices and even if you moved, her reputation for dating black guys would follow her in some way.. Although I was 24 when I started dating black, I myself was harassed by a few of my friends and like your *******, it even meant losing those friends because of it.. but you know what, I finally realized that those racist friends weren't really my friends.. Funny thing about that was for every friend I lost, it seemed as if I gained twice as many as I ever had who were also supportive to my interracial relationships... Yes, it seems as if interracial dating is getting more and more popular ever day and it's exciting to know that you yourself seem to be very involved also..

So hang in there Kandi... hopefully in time, things will change for the best both for you and your ******* and possibly for your other daughters in the future.. If you would like to chat more with me about this, maybe it would be best in a private message, but either way is okay with me... I wish y'all the best..

Janice
 
I'm sure this may have been stated in the previous comments, but if those people aren't doing anything for you directly, then you shouldn't worry about them. They'll probably mess with you just to get a response, but who you date is your business. For yourself and your children, please don't deprive yourself of potential happiness because of what others think of you, trust me, if you're happy your children will feed off of that and you'll all be much happier for it, and the same goes for the opposite.
 
...Another reason why I say you should stay is that you mentioned that the area is changing and is getting more mixed and if this is happening, I can only assume that you will soon see more and more white girls (and also adult white women) dating black men in the near future and with that happening, it's likely that there will be less and less harassment and bullying in the school. My black boyfriends nephew is in a school where only a few years ago there wasn't hardly any white girls dating black boys but once a few of them started doing so, it took off like wildfire and now it seems as if more than half the high school white girls are dating black.. I know this because we go to watch him play football often and see it first hand.. and yes, he has a gorgeous white girlfriend himself....

Janice

This is my line of thinking too. If your ******* sticks it out and shows how happy she is with black guys maybe the other white girls will stop and even get curious about black guys themselves! Imagine how awesome it would be if your ******* pioneered IR dating to her school :)
 
I am tired to moving. I don't want to let them win so we will stay and be strong.
Kandi, I think you made the right decision. You are showing your ******* how to beat the bullies and the ignorant - Stand up to them! However, I would keep an eye on things and tell your ******* to tell you about any escalations. Some ignoramuses or bullies just get meaner. The fighting concerns me. That is way beyond the point where it should have gotten to. Just be careful. Proving a point is good. Standing up to bullies is good. Right up to the point where it puts people in danger. I admire your courage and your *******'s.
 
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