corrinecez
Female
When I first started watching porn, I found a variety of titles.
Titles that girlfriends told me were ‘good’ appealed to the normal me. Intellectual, sensitive, delicate. They tended to be well made by people who cared. There was intimacy and sensualness and often good music and conversation. Good general filmmaking.
But the normal me doesn’t really want sex. The normal me is an academic and I am not a man. Highly academic men like university professors will still think about sex a lot and try to find opportunities with female students. But I really do not think about sex most of the time. I can see a handsome young man and know he is handsome, but my heart hardly flutters.
I think it has to do with testesterone levels. I don’t have much testesterone, so I just don’t have a lot of sexual wants for at least 2 weeks every month. I could not care less about sex scenes on TV or in ‘female friendly porn’.
It’s not my upbringing. I’m not a prude. But when sex scenes play on TV, I usually identify them as having no information value towards the enjoyment of the movie or serial, and do other errands. I am that indifferent at times. I’m literally sexless.
Then there is the other me.
I’m really writing to record this other me. I’m heading towards menopause, and that means my hormones are going to change. How will that change me, nobody can tell.
Will my fantasies totally change? Will my desires no longer exist, or be totally transformed? How will my self image change?
I have rarely confided my deepest fantasies to other women. Except as abstract, distant intellectual discussions. A forum like this is ideal. I don’t even have to be taken as a real person; it does scare me a bit if anyone could identify my real identity. There are probably not that many female professors who would fit my description across institutions of higher learning...
Well...
I’m a hardcore porn addict. More than that, I really go for the ‘female unfriendly’ stuff. The forceful, powerful, aggressive, masculine porn.
I normally don’t feel like a woman. I don’t even know what a woman is supposed to feel like. I’m not that emotional or soft or relationship oriented 60% of the time. I’m very much intellectual and sexually frigid.
But about 30, 40% of the time, I sense a certain feminity in me. Certain desires. I need to be validated and confirmed as a woman, and I want to be submissive, to be taken, to be dominated and controlled and overpowered.
I can grapple with this intellectually, but stumble with it in practice. I can masturbate, but it’s hard to communicate my needs adequately to partners or to find the right partners to serve my needs. I certainly deal with it pretty badly in real life, which is why masturbation is important to me.
I saw many porn titles before my first hardcore ‘female unfriendly’ title. These were introduced by giggling girlfriends, and we watched these together. I can’t even identify my first few porn titles, because they were mixed up with mainstream movies like The Lover and Dirty Dancing which I remember much better. The porn I watched as a teen felt fun, intimate, enjoyable. We even tried dancing with each other (I mean, me and various girlfriends). Safe, friendly entertainment just as easily digested as white bread with jam.
Then I watched hardcore porn. I was frozen. But I couldn’t take my eyes off the screen. I came back again and again until after a few years I realized that I was a hardcore porn addict. There are many titles I enjoy that even fairly aggressive and nasty men don’t.
[substantial self-censorship here; I’ll publish my other musings at some other time.]
I’m never sure of an actress enjoys her work. But as time passed, I realized that some actresses really enjoyed their work. When you are financially successful and a well established name and even have a bunch of titles under your direction, and you still make the aggressive stuff, it is probably because you liked it to begin with.
Now I’m left wondering . What is female unfriendly porn?
Katsuni is rich and doesn’t need the money. Yet hundreds of titles she makes, and they feature some common traits. The men just grab her and go to town on her face. They ******* her. They slap her, push her down.
Katsuni oozes feminity all the time. By that I mean something very different from what feminist intellectuals in my school would call feminity. Katsuni is on the ground crawling almost every scene, she’s on a leash, she’s in chains, she’s all submissive and receptive. The men just grab and manhandle her. They give her a hard ass pounding, then they shove her head down on their dicks straight from her ass. No mercy. Katsuni almost chokes, they pull out and pound her asshole some more.
I’m really turned on by this. I want to be like one of these girls, to put my face on another girl’s butt, and let the men fuck her ass, my face, her ass nonstop. It’s so degrading that watching stuff like this makes my skin burn all over and get taut and gives me sweat and goosebumps all together.
But despite my love for hardcore stuff, over time I realized that there is something which makes me different from most (male) porn consumers.
I don’t like to watch the later parts of most porn movies. I like the earlier parts, where women are more often featured crawling, being spanked, kneeling naked in front of dressed men. Earlier parts of every porn movie almost invariably show at least some blow jobs, rimming or tea bagging.
All of that shows the woman’s face.
Okay, I understand that a pillar of any porn movie is about big cocks pounding cunts. I, too, want to feel like a cunt. A fuckee. When I see big dicks being pushed into vaginas, I imagine myself as the vagina receiving dick too.
But the difference is that I just can’t stand to watch that for twenty minutes. One, two are enough for me. And after watching so many movies produced by men, I’ve come to realize that while women often do have the same needs as men, the approach is still different.
When watching hardcore porn I really don’t care about soft lighting and soft words. I’m all about submission, degradation, humiliation. I feel like a real woman and crave male power and dominance. I suspect a good many women enjoy the same thing. That’s how Fifty Shades of Gray became so popular.
But I can’t enjoy myself unless I’m seeing a woman’s face. I have to mimic her expressions, or at least take cues from how she looks. Only then can I start identifying with what is being done to her.
Men can get aroused by seeing the same butt invaded by repetitive action for half an hour, but I can’t masturbate to that. My skin stops burning. My heart rate drops. I want to fall asleep. I become like the women who fall asleep during sex because the man is only concerned with repetitive action and not with creating the mood.
I wish someone could tell a film director to invest in more cameras. Technology has reached the stage where you can offer different ways for a viewer to enjoy her porn. Two or more scenes on the same screen. Watch from different angles or POVs. Then I can zoom in on the woman’s face most of the time, zooming out occasionally for the larger picture or the genital action.
Another thing is, practically all hardcore porn fails to offer the female POV.
I’m really tired of some movie that calls itself xyz POV. The POV is perpetually a male POV. He’s looking down at some penis invading a woman, and most of the time the woman is just a white back. How can any woman identify with just a back?
Directors need to start investing in new types of cameras. I want to feel like a woman when I’m watching porn. Apart from the action being recorded from a third person perspective on another screen, I also want a screen to show a big dick coming towards me, with all the menace and virility that it implies. I want the camera to show the actress’ face/ my face being smushed against a man’s groin during deep throat. I want to see balls up close, as though I’m the one licking such a nasty and ugly scrotum.
And the sound effects! OMG!
A lot of men just don’t understand that women may crave the same things, but they won’t say it. I like to see Alexa Lynn in porn. She’s the epitome of a cute tiny white girl being fucked silly by big black men. In my own fantasy, I’m Alexa Lynn at times. But I need to turn off the sound. It’s totally unbelieveable.
A woman in a submissive mood won’t tell a man what to do. It’s so hard and so unnatural. I would never say ‘fuck me hard’, ‘stick it in my pussy’, ‘I wanna taste my own ass’. Can’t bring myself to say such things. I’m usually silent, I make little squeals of fear or excitement, I gasp for breath, I moan, I’m passive and submissive and feminine and receptive. I’m just waiting for a man to do as he pleases to me, without asking for my consent.
I think that’s what makes a female consumer of porn, no matter how ‘female unfriendly’, different from a man. We want the men to be strong, dominant, nasty. Making a woman eat sperm from another woman’s asshole is the definition of nasty. Its so disgusting and humiliating that it also turns us on. (I have a big collection of cumfart-themed videos.)
But we want the men to just compel us. They are in charge. They are dominant. They command, they take us by the hair or leash.
If you grab my head at the end of an orgy and pull me towards some butt or pussy filled with sperm, I will automatically start licking and cleaning the other girl. It drives me crazy with anticipation everytime I start smelling sperm. But I dunno, it must be the lack of testesterone in me, but I just can’t take that initiative to do it myself. When I see pornstars do things on their own, without the proper command being issued by a master, it doesn’t come off right. It feel unnatural, like an actress acting out a script.
I need a master to act masterful.
That’s another big failure of female unfriendly porn. Yes, I know most men like to fantasize about nasty girls offering to taste their own asses. But it’s just freakiness when it comes out randomly from a woman in porn.
You do as you please to us; we aim to satisfy you. We’ll clean your cock no matter what hole it comes out of, that’s what it means to be submissive and obedient. All my self respect is surrendered to you, the dominant partner. But BE dominant.
Most porn is spoiled by the men talking. Many porn actors, especially the black ones, are actually beta males who just happen to be born with big penises. They are paid by the directors, who are the true alphas. They don’t really have the poise and confidence to be truly dominant. And it shows! I’m sorry, but although many black pornstars have the body and the dick size to look dominant, their mannerisms and speech will dispel that enchantment. Shane Diesel looks and talks like a dork. Sledge Hammer smiles so much I think he must have been a clown or nursery school teacher in his previous job. Franco Roccaforte tastes every girl’s asshole – but degrading acts should be reserved for the white girls in hardcore interracial porn. These guys don’t convey alpha, frankly I prefer my own collection of dildos because at least they are Darth-Vader black and really look menacing up front.
Seriously, even when I am in a submissive mood, I can’t drop to my knees in front of someone who comes across as a minimum wage deliveryman, a total non-alpha, in real life. One rare exception of a dominant Black actor is Lexington Steele, who was an educated (banker?) from the East Coast previously. Not suprising here, but Steele is indeed capable of portraying alpha, because he isn’t some loser picked off the streets by white men looking for black male labor to exploit.
With modern technology, I wish even the soundtrack could be edited for dual track. Male-oriented porn gets the girls talking trash. Get someone to lip sync; I really don’t think most porn actresses truly find it natural to say “I want to taste my own ass!” Then female-oriented porn offers female viewers men who actually talk in a dominant fashion. If the male actors can’t do it, get a voice actor to convey dominance. That’s how to put a woman in a submissive frame of mind.
I hope some one eventually clues in and makes porn that can genuinely appeal to women.
Titles that girlfriends told me were ‘good’ appealed to the normal me. Intellectual, sensitive, delicate. They tended to be well made by people who cared. There was intimacy and sensualness and often good music and conversation. Good general filmmaking.
But the normal me doesn’t really want sex. The normal me is an academic and I am not a man. Highly academic men like university professors will still think about sex a lot and try to find opportunities with female students. But I really do not think about sex most of the time. I can see a handsome young man and know he is handsome, but my heart hardly flutters.
I think it has to do with testesterone levels. I don’t have much testesterone, so I just don’t have a lot of sexual wants for at least 2 weeks every month. I could not care less about sex scenes on TV or in ‘female friendly porn’.
It’s not my upbringing. I’m not a prude. But when sex scenes play on TV, I usually identify them as having no information value towards the enjoyment of the movie or serial, and do other errands. I am that indifferent at times. I’m literally sexless.
Then there is the other me.
I’m really writing to record this other me. I’m heading towards menopause, and that means my hormones are going to change. How will that change me, nobody can tell.
Will my fantasies totally change? Will my desires no longer exist, or be totally transformed? How will my self image change?
I have rarely confided my deepest fantasies to other women. Except as abstract, distant intellectual discussions. A forum like this is ideal. I don’t even have to be taken as a real person; it does scare me a bit if anyone could identify my real identity. There are probably not that many female professors who would fit my description across institutions of higher learning...
Well...
I’m a hardcore porn addict. More than that, I really go for the ‘female unfriendly’ stuff. The forceful, powerful, aggressive, masculine porn.
I normally don’t feel like a woman. I don’t even know what a woman is supposed to feel like. I’m not that emotional or soft or relationship oriented 60% of the time. I’m very much intellectual and sexually frigid.
But about 30, 40% of the time, I sense a certain feminity in me. Certain desires. I need to be validated and confirmed as a woman, and I want to be submissive, to be taken, to be dominated and controlled and overpowered.
I can grapple with this intellectually, but stumble with it in practice. I can masturbate, but it’s hard to communicate my needs adequately to partners or to find the right partners to serve my needs. I certainly deal with it pretty badly in real life, which is why masturbation is important to me.
I saw many porn titles before my first hardcore ‘female unfriendly’ title. These were introduced by giggling girlfriends, and we watched these together. I can’t even identify my first few porn titles, because they were mixed up with mainstream movies like The Lover and Dirty Dancing which I remember much better. The porn I watched as a teen felt fun, intimate, enjoyable. We even tried dancing with each other (I mean, me and various girlfriends). Safe, friendly entertainment just as easily digested as white bread with jam.
Then I watched hardcore porn. I was frozen. But I couldn’t take my eyes off the screen. I came back again and again until after a few years I realized that I was a hardcore porn addict. There are many titles I enjoy that even fairly aggressive and nasty men don’t.
[substantial self-censorship here; I’ll publish my other musings at some other time.]
I’m never sure of an actress enjoys her work. But as time passed, I realized that some actresses really enjoyed their work. When you are financially successful and a well established name and even have a bunch of titles under your direction, and you still make the aggressive stuff, it is probably because you liked it to begin with.
Now I’m left wondering . What is female unfriendly porn?
Katsuni is rich and doesn’t need the money. Yet hundreds of titles she makes, and they feature some common traits. The men just grab her and go to town on her face. They ******* her. They slap her, push her down.
Katsuni oozes feminity all the time. By that I mean something very different from what feminist intellectuals in my school would call feminity. Katsuni is on the ground crawling almost every scene, she’s on a leash, she’s in chains, she’s all submissive and receptive. The men just grab and manhandle her. They give her a hard ass pounding, then they shove her head down on their dicks straight from her ass. No mercy. Katsuni almost chokes, they pull out and pound her asshole some more.
I’m really turned on by this. I want to be like one of these girls, to put my face on another girl’s butt, and let the men fuck her ass, my face, her ass nonstop. It’s so degrading that watching stuff like this makes my skin burn all over and get taut and gives me sweat and goosebumps all together.
But despite my love for hardcore stuff, over time I realized that there is something which makes me different from most (male) porn consumers.
I don’t like to watch the later parts of most porn movies. I like the earlier parts, where women are more often featured crawling, being spanked, kneeling naked in front of dressed men. Earlier parts of every porn movie almost invariably show at least some blow jobs, rimming or tea bagging.
All of that shows the woman’s face.
Okay, I understand that a pillar of any porn movie is about big cocks pounding cunts. I, too, want to feel like a cunt. A fuckee. When I see big dicks being pushed into vaginas, I imagine myself as the vagina receiving dick too.
But the difference is that I just can’t stand to watch that for twenty minutes. One, two are enough for me. And after watching so many movies produced by men, I’ve come to realize that while women often do have the same needs as men, the approach is still different.
When watching hardcore porn I really don’t care about soft lighting and soft words. I’m all about submission, degradation, humiliation. I feel like a real woman and crave male power and dominance. I suspect a good many women enjoy the same thing. That’s how Fifty Shades of Gray became so popular.
But I can’t enjoy myself unless I’m seeing a woman’s face. I have to mimic her expressions, or at least take cues from how she looks. Only then can I start identifying with what is being done to her.
Men can get aroused by seeing the same butt invaded by repetitive action for half an hour, but I can’t masturbate to that. My skin stops burning. My heart rate drops. I want to fall asleep. I become like the women who fall asleep during sex because the man is only concerned with repetitive action and not with creating the mood.
I wish someone could tell a film director to invest in more cameras. Technology has reached the stage where you can offer different ways for a viewer to enjoy her porn. Two or more scenes on the same screen. Watch from different angles or POVs. Then I can zoom in on the woman’s face most of the time, zooming out occasionally for the larger picture or the genital action.
Another thing is, practically all hardcore porn fails to offer the female POV.
I’m really tired of some movie that calls itself xyz POV. The POV is perpetually a male POV. He’s looking down at some penis invading a woman, and most of the time the woman is just a white back. How can any woman identify with just a back?
Directors need to start investing in new types of cameras. I want to feel like a woman when I’m watching porn. Apart from the action being recorded from a third person perspective on another screen, I also want a screen to show a big dick coming towards me, with all the menace and virility that it implies. I want the camera to show the actress’ face/ my face being smushed against a man’s groin during deep throat. I want to see balls up close, as though I’m the one licking such a nasty and ugly scrotum.
And the sound effects! OMG!
A lot of men just don’t understand that women may crave the same things, but they won’t say it. I like to see Alexa Lynn in porn. She’s the epitome of a cute tiny white girl being fucked silly by big black men. In my own fantasy, I’m Alexa Lynn at times. But I need to turn off the sound. It’s totally unbelieveable.
A woman in a submissive mood won’t tell a man what to do. It’s so hard and so unnatural. I would never say ‘fuck me hard’, ‘stick it in my pussy’, ‘I wanna taste my own ass’. Can’t bring myself to say such things. I’m usually silent, I make little squeals of fear or excitement, I gasp for breath, I moan, I’m passive and submissive and feminine and receptive. I’m just waiting for a man to do as he pleases to me, without asking for my consent.
I think that’s what makes a female consumer of porn, no matter how ‘female unfriendly’, different from a man. We want the men to be strong, dominant, nasty. Making a woman eat sperm from another woman’s asshole is the definition of nasty. Its so disgusting and humiliating that it also turns us on. (I have a big collection of cumfart-themed videos.)
But we want the men to just compel us. They are in charge. They are dominant. They command, they take us by the hair or leash.
If you grab my head at the end of an orgy and pull me towards some butt or pussy filled with sperm, I will automatically start licking and cleaning the other girl. It drives me crazy with anticipation everytime I start smelling sperm. But I dunno, it must be the lack of testesterone in me, but I just can’t take that initiative to do it myself. When I see pornstars do things on their own, without the proper command being issued by a master, it doesn’t come off right. It feel unnatural, like an actress acting out a script.
I need a master to act masterful.
That’s another big failure of female unfriendly porn. Yes, I know most men like to fantasize about nasty girls offering to taste their own asses. But it’s just freakiness when it comes out randomly from a woman in porn.
You do as you please to us; we aim to satisfy you. We’ll clean your cock no matter what hole it comes out of, that’s what it means to be submissive and obedient. All my self respect is surrendered to you, the dominant partner. But BE dominant.
Most porn is spoiled by the men talking. Many porn actors, especially the black ones, are actually beta males who just happen to be born with big penises. They are paid by the directors, who are the true alphas. They don’t really have the poise and confidence to be truly dominant. And it shows! I’m sorry, but although many black pornstars have the body and the dick size to look dominant, their mannerisms and speech will dispel that enchantment. Shane Diesel looks and talks like a dork. Sledge Hammer smiles so much I think he must have been a clown or nursery school teacher in his previous job. Franco Roccaforte tastes every girl’s asshole – but degrading acts should be reserved for the white girls in hardcore interracial porn. These guys don’t convey alpha, frankly I prefer my own collection of dildos because at least they are Darth-Vader black and really look menacing up front.
Seriously, even when I am in a submissive mood, I can’t drop to my knees in front of someone who comes across as a minimum wage deliveryman, a total non-alpha, in real life. One rare exception of a dominant Black actor is Lexington Steele, who was an educated (banker?) from the East Coast previously. Not suprising here, but Steele is indeed capable of portraying alpha, because he isn’t some loser picked off the streets by white men looking for black male labor to exploit.
With modern technology, I wish even the soundtrack could be edited for dual track. Male-oriented porn gets the girls talking trash. Get someone to lip sync; I really don’t think most porn actresses truly find it natural to say “I want to taste my own ass!” Then female-oriented porn offers female viewers men who actually talk in a dominant fashion. If the male actors can’t do it, get a voice actor to convey dominance. That’s how to put a woman in a submissive frame of mind.
I hope some one eventually clues in and makes porn that can genuinely appeal to women.
