Waiver

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Drewandher, Jun 10, 2015.

  1. Drewandher

    Drewandher New Member

    Gender:
    Male
    Do (did) any males/couples waiver on their decision to enter into this lifestyle? Here is a little background on her and I. The fantasy, to me, has always been about watching her having the sex of her life with another, much larger guy. Her becoming slightly slutty to another man. Loving a much bigger dick. I have imagined this countless times.

    But, she is happy with our life. She is not an overly sexual person with a highly active sexual imagination. She fantasizes about career advancement and building our lifestyle. We have sex, she always has an orgasm, albeit not some full body-tremor type orgasm, and we move on. Sex is easy and fun. Anytime I have brought up the idea of her fucking another man, it makes her uncomfortable. Why should I pursue this lifestyle? Yes there are probably better sexual experiences out there for her, mind-blowing experiences I am sure, but if she does not seem to care about that, why push?

    Im not really sure what type of responses I am looking for. I have been going back and forth for awhile now with this. Her and I haven't spoken about it in months and I do not want to bring it up again until I am fully behind it. I think I just needed a forum to get these thoughts together.
     
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  2. cps

    cps Well-Known Member Real Person Gold Member

    Gender:
    Female
    Country:
    US
    I can relate to your situation as it sounds similar to where my hubby and I were 5 years ago. I've been in the lifestyle now for 2 years, but I had my doubts and fears the first time my hubby suggested it.

    You asked the question if things are good, why push it? The answer is don't push it. I have to hand it to my hubby, he was never pushy. He was perceptive and would bring it up when he sensed I might be open to discussing it. He was patient and let me process it at my pace.

    Trust me, she is thinking about it, but she is processing it in a different way than you may think. She's asking herself questions, like all the what ifs. The best thing you can do is encourage and talk. Reassure her that if she does it, you will be supportive. And if she doesn't, you'll support that too. It's her decision, it's her body.

    That's how it went for us for 3 years before my first time with a black guy. Now, I'm having the best sex of my life.
     
  3. Drewandher

    Drewandher New Member

    Gender:
    Male
    Thats great and I am happy it has worked so well for you guys. I think what I am coming to grips with is the reality that she might just be genuinely happy with what we have. It is confusing. I guess I am just attempting to find some clarity.
     
  4. MacNfries

    MacNfries Well-Known Member Sweet & Cordial Gold Member

    Gender:
    Male
    Country:
    US

    Drewandher, you're a lucky guy, man, and I'm serious. Listen to yourself talk, and take your own logic from it. Your lady lives in a reality world, and you desire dragging her into a dangerous world of fantasy play. It's ok to fantasy play when everyone is on the same page, but the two of you aren't, and she's being the logical one. Getting opinion on this lifestyle in this forum is going to be biased; you're not getting a true sampling of opinion, because folks here are mostly into this.

    For one thing, the 2 of you aren't married, you're engaged to get married ... she has her priorities straight; she's not about to fuck that up. She's chosen you as her lifelong partner; if she is such an incredible woman, you'll appreciate she's chosen you over someone who would only treat her as a piece of ass. It's very possible, down the road (years after being together) she may desire and need to do something to create renewed excitement in her love life with you, but now isn't the time. And when & if she does make that decision, it may be a totally different desire ... maybe she'll want a 3-some or one-on-one with another female, or maybe a small gangbang, or just fantasy play. It would be helpful to you if you'd sit down with her and determine what kinds of sexual fantasies she has. That's going to be your first building block to marriage diversity anyways. But right now, in the moment, she's focused in the reality world.

    If you desire to start "building" your case for what you desire, buy/rent some videos. Start out with something mild ones, and if she shows interest, go stronger. If you know what her sexual fantasies are, get some videos that play to those as well. But, you're a wise man to leave this alone with her for now. You can still come here , with 80% of the other folks, and use this site to jerk off in your fantasy world.

    Best wishes to you and yours; the marriage institution is a good world. I've been married 18 years as of this Summer, and together 20 ... its a good thing.
    Mac gif_Yellowball-Spock.gif
     
  5. Drewandher

    Drewandher New Member

    Gender:
    Male
     
  6. Drewandher

    Drewandher New Member

    Gender:
    Male
    The more I think about it, the less I want it.\
     
    MacNfries likes this.
  7. MacNfries

    MacNfries Well-Known Member Sweet & Cordial Gold Member

    Gender:
    Male
    Country:
    US
    Including other partners in your marriage sex play can work, so I'm not discouraging you from experimenting as a couple. But the "timing" with your lady is just bad ... get married, get settled, and THEN decide (together) what types of sexual excitement you should have.
    pic_IMHP-InMyHumbleOpinion.jpg
     
  8. Drewandher

    Drewandher New Member

    Gender:
    Male
    I see what you and CPS are saying. When I wrote started this thread and posted to your responses I was only going on about an hour of sleep and in my delirium I missed what you both were actually saying. Now might not be the time but there is plenty of time in the future. Appreciate the responses!
     
  9. D'Arcy James

    D'Arcy James Member Real Person

    Gender:
    Male
    Dude. It's simple. Don't fuck up your situation over something that YOU want. I've seen marriages and relationships destroyed behind folks not being on the same page with this, and I hate it. If you have to, link up with a woman who will fulfill the fantasy for you. But, don't let your real world get wrecked by your fantasy one. If your girl isn't down, she's not down to do it. Period.
     
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  10. D'Arcy James

    D'Arcy James Member Real Person

    Gender:
    Male
    and now for a shameless, selfish, post by me.......Drew, your girl has a GLORIOUS ass.....lol..you need to seriously reconsider this......
     
  11. Drewandher

    Drewandher New Member

    Gender:
    Male
    Long story short, Im not pushing anything. Sex is an important part of any relationship, but its supposed to be a fun part, not a stressful part. Im not pushing it, Im just going to sit back and enjoy fucking her myself haha.

    And yes, he ass is simply out of this world. Especially when she walks around in these lose, very high cut wavy shorts that her ass just falls out of.
     
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  12. D'Arcy James

    D'Arcy James Member Real Person

    Gender:
    Male
    Damn right. Share that? Hell. To. The. No. I'd keep my mouth full of all that goodness every chance I could. Lol...
     
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  13. Ann4BBC

    Ann4BBC Well-Known Member Real Person Gold Member

    Gender:
    Female
    Country:
    UK
    I definitely waivered! Hubby took years to finally get me to do it. I was always turned on by the idea, but was worried about it being 'wrong' somehow and hubby later changing his mind and getting jealous. Only when he convinced me that he wouldnt be jealous did i start. But even my hubby waivered at the start, when i looked at him in the car after being with my first guy, his face still looked like he thought i wouldnt have gone through it!
    But the waivering subsided and weve mainly enjoyed it.
    One thing im learning, even now, is that im planning on meeting a guy from another interracial dating site, that my hubby arranged. And this feels quite exciting, like a new start for me and hubby. Up to now ive just met a guy in a night club or one of their friends. Think the website thing might be better (unless hes not genuine and im left in a hotel bar!) X
     
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  14. Drewandher

    Drewandher New Member

    Gender:
    Male
    The fantasy is still very, very hot.