Hello all,
I want to be as delicate as possible with this but I think it's a very real issue and has happened to me personally not but three years ago.
Your really into your bull. He takes you out to the club to show you off. You notice a few women throwing shade but you ignore it.
Then, in the ladies room, four black women verbally and physically assault you for "stealing their men" and "being hoe"
My question is:
What advice would you give a younger white girl who's in this situation?
Sincerely,
Sara
@Mrs.InCharge - thank you so very much for starting off this thread. This is something that should be addressed and discussed in a general forum topic for all especially those new to Interracial dating or for those who have not yet faced these challenges but one day may be confronted by other ignorant, intolerant, hateful, and bigoted people.
I have dated many white/asian and other women who were non-black and I have felt the laser-beams coming from Black women's eyes almost burn a hole in the back of my head many times before when they would see me. I have been in bars, and other settings where I was the only black guy or maybe 1 of 2 with white women also and had eyes all stare. I am very secure and confident in my own skin, I've traveled the world been to dangerous places, and I feel like I can handle my own anywhere and nothing really bothers me but
@Splitter and my brutha
@bm_from_southjersey have provided good advice in being conscious of your surroundings and make an exit to avoid unnecessary confrontation when possible if outnumbered. Sometimes to make a scene is not necessarily the right thing to do especially if it is going to lead to physical harm.
I've been a practitioner of the martial arts (Akido, Thai-boxing, and Jeet Kun-do) so I'm not prone to run from a fight as I feel confident I can handle myself physically and I've sparred in a few Mixed martial arts matches as well. But one thing Bruce Lee (the founder of Jeet Kun-do) said that has always stuck in the back of my head about the first move in any fight was this "take a step back and run if you can".
Yep, thats right Bruce Lee said the first step in any fight was to take a step back, and this is something in most of the moral Kung-fu movies like the Shaolin Temple, 36 Chambers, The Legend of Fung-Sai Yuk, etc. is to always avoid fighting when possible. Even the
Art of War espouses as a major tenet "
Know your enemy...", and
"For to win one hundred victories in one hundred battles is not the acme of skill. To subdue the enemy without fighting is the acme of skill."
The Art of War is also about deception and you feign weakness to your opponent even though you are strong to throw them off, but in this case you are the bigger and stronger person to ignore their racist behavior and not feed into it emotionally nor give them the pleasure of making you feel any less of a human. The person who can avoid being argumentive and fighting is really the bigger and stronger person as it takes alot to hold back your anger when you are ready to throw punches and go toe to toe blow for blow with someone.
So enough of me blabbering on and on for now, check out these amazing videos that may be of some help too on combating racial tension with Interracial relationships.
This first one was pretty good and look how other black people stepped in to confront the biggotry and hatred they witnessed occurring. I like how the last black guy and black lady handled the situations. They said some really beautiful things that should soften anyone's hearts that are hard with hatred.
Ok another good one, a black guy, white girl meeting the white girl's parents who are racist and I love how the one white guy got up and defended the black kid saying "I don't know this kid but I'm not going to sit here and listen to you make racial slurs at him". Great and inspiring stuff that gives me hope about humanity still:
Now in the last video I don't necessarily agree with what the black guy did and I personally would not have shaken nor hugged the white lady and told her that her mind-state was old, backward thinking and racist and has no place in our day and age of integration and I'm glad old people who think like her (both black and white) are dying off with those old mentality of race separation. But that's just me.
I watch a few videos from my bro here Tyrone Magnus whom is a funny guy and here is one when he was dating a white women addressing a letter written to them about Parents breaking up a white girl's relationship with her black boyfriend. The mudshark lover line got me laughing too: