some advice, cold feet

[mikeandlia]

Hi folks, figured I found the right place 2 ask for this kind of advice!
So, a little over a year ago, my wife and I decided we'd judgement free, do each other's fantasy. I got 2 go first, and I asked for anal sex, which we never did and it was granted. Then, my wife, as you might have guesses, said she wanted 2 be fucked by a black guy... I realized after, my request might have been a little tame... Anyway, a few months later, after a lot of talking, we create a dating profile on okcupid, and say we're a couple with this fantasy. She agreed I'd have 2 be there. I swear in less than 48 hours there's easily 40 messages. She picks her favorite and in just a couple days, we set up a no strings attached date at a hotel a city over, where this guy is from. Now I'm not actually in 2 watching so much, my reason for being there is 2 make sure she's safe. The guy is younger, 22, my wife 26, he seems a little immature in person, my wife doesn't care. We had ground rules in place beforehand, no openmouthed kissing, must wear condom, nothing rough... The guy was very polite I suppose, and my wife enjoyed it. I was bothered at first, but it was hot watching her so turned on... i should mention our sex is at least as good, just i'm not black. Afterwards, she thanks me and told me she thought I wouldn't go through with it. Our sex life improved a bit and she even offered anal every now and then. We barely mentioned the encounter after and she seems over it. Somewhere inbetween we stopped using birth control and were semi trying 2 get pregnant. A few months ago, she gets pregnant, we're happy. We start having lots of sex, I even find myself unable 2 keep up some days, but I'm thrilled. A couple weeks ago, she tells me that she was thinking about doing her fantasy properly, when i asked, she said it didn't really count because of the condom and her fantasy was actually 2 have sex the way we do, where i finish inside her... when I tell her that's cheating, she brings up all the anal we've had, how horny she's been and the one or two times I did't give her what she wanted. She said now that she's pregant, we don't have to worry once the guy is tested... obviously. I'm wondering if there aare any other guys with similar experiences... where it isn't the guy's kink, and it's this extreme... she wants 2 fuck a guy unprotected and let him come inside her. She tells me I don't have to be there... but that's a bluff... I don't want 2 be a jerk and forbid her... I really wasn't bothered by the way things happened that first time, but this request has bothered me quite a bit... is that fair? is there really a difference at this point? Any advice or opinions are wecome! Cheers

(Edit: when I said “cheating” I meant cheating our agreement, not infidelity.)

 

[mikeandlia]

Doesn't change. MACs original premise. Something happens to the baby and how are you both feeling then. Yes LOTS of pregnant women still have sex and some with black men and some are already pregnant by their black lovers. But not you yet

The premise is based on something that’s incorrect. We have been reassured by gp and obgyn that sex is totally safe in normal pregnancies, and we are totally fine, we can have all the sex we want once its SAFE sex, which we always would do even if we weren’t pregnant.
I’m not sure what the last part of ur msg is? She is not planning to get pregnant by anyone else. That has nothing to do with us.

 

[mikeandlia]

Hello Mike , well you opened "Pandoras" box. ( BBC ) and she liked it. But the condom kept her from bareback and skin to skin and him comong inside her. So now she wants that. Not really a huge surprise here. So the real question becomes now or later because she is already headed down this road. Ie SHE wants it. My thoughts are something for her after first baby is born. Black guys get turned on by white women who have new babys and are breast feeding. Women who have recovered from the birth still have lots of hormones floating in their body and are super horney for sex. Seems like something that she will do sooner or later and perhaps many times in the years ahead. Like so many wives now.

If anything once then baby comes she'll be over it. our wild thoughts are for before we r parents.
I see there’s s lots of fantasies here about humiliation and female domination. Li enjoys some domination with me but that has nothing to do with her interracial fantasy. She said and i know she wouldn’t be comfortable with that with someone else. The “cuckold” thing is not something either of us are into. Nothing against it, just not our cup of tea.

 

[WillandSusn]

If anything once then baby comes she'll be over it. our wild thoughts are for before we r parents.
I see there’s s lots of fantasies here about humiliation and female domination. Li enjoys some domination with me but that has nothing to do with her interracial fantasy. She said and i know she wouldn’t be comfortable with that with someone else. The “cuckold” thing is not something either of us are into. Nothing against it, just not our cup of tea.

Lots of white couples/ parents exploring sexual experiences today. Having ******* doesn't seem to be a barrier for them. They have lots of reasons for doing it too. Yes. You can have sex while she is pregnant just not vigorous sex as some people are inclined to do. And some positions are not recommended. Bareback sex usually carries the risk of STDs and pregancy for fertile women. Sometimes , its the thought of being black pregnant that is a turn on for women. More women having IR babies today. Always avoid STds.

 

[WillandSusn]

If anything once then baby comes she'll be over it. our wild thoughts are for before we r parents.
I see there’s s lots of fantasies here about humiliation and female domination. Li enjoys some domination with me but that has nothing to do with her interracial fantasy. She said and i know she wouldn’t be comfortable with that with someone else. The “cuckold” thing is not something either of us are into. Nothing against it, just not our cup of tea.

Some advantages to having a hotwife. Doesn't have to be humiliation and domination for either of you. Women really enjoy the bareback BBc and the lots of cum inside them. Yes you do need to keep things under control and set limits and rules. No. You don't need to go the black breeding route especially if you have other *******. We have gone through a time when women were focused on career and less on ******* but that seems to have changed as many women are now finding that career doesn't give them everything. Having ******* seems to be back. Seeing more women with ******* by different guys. Life is a long time and some women have more relationships over the 80 years.

 

[tobecucked]

Hi folks, figured I found the right place 2 ask for this kind of advice!
So, a little over a year ago, my wife and I decided we'd judgement free, do each other's fantasy. I got 2 go first, and I asked for anal sex, which we never did and it was granted. Then, my wife, as you might have guesses, said she wanted 2 be fucked by a black guy... I realized after, my request might have been a little tame... Anyway, a few months later, after a lot of talking, we create a dating profile on okcupid, and say we're a couple with this fantasy. She agreed I'd have 2 be there. I swear in less than 48 hours there's easily 40 messages. She picks her favorite and in just a couple days, we set up a no strings attached date at a hotel a city over, where this guy is from. Now I'm not actually in 2 watching so much, my reason for being there is 2 make sure she's safe. The guy is younger, 22, my wife 26, he seems a little immature in person, my wife doesn't care. We had ground rules in place beforehand, no openmouthed kissing, must wear condom, nothing rough... The guy was very polite I suppose, and my wife enjoyed it. I was bothered at first, but it was hot watching her so turned on... i should mention our sex is at least as good, just i'm not black. Afterwards, she thanks me and told me she thought I wouldn't go through with it. Our sex life improved a bit and she even offered anal every now and then. We barely mentioned the encounter after and she seems over it. Somewhere inbetween we stopped using birth control and were semi trying 2 get pregnant. A few months ago, she gets pregnant, we're happy. We start having lots of sex, I even find myself unable 2 keep up some days, but I'm thrilled. A couple weeks ago, she tells me that she was thinking about doing her fantasy properly, when i asked, she said it didn't really count because of the condom and her fantasy was actually 2 have sex the way we do, where i finish inside her... when I tell her that's cheating, she brings up all the anal we've had, how horny she's been and the one or two times I did't give her what she wanted. She said now that she's pregant, we don't have to worry once the guy is tested... obviously. I'm wondering if there aare any other guys with similar experiences... where it isn't the guy's kink, and it's this extreme... she wants 2 fuck a guy unprotected and let him come inside her. She tells me I don't have to be there... but that's a bluff... I don't want 2 be a jerk and forbid her... I really wasn't bothered by the way things happened that first time, but this request has bothered me quite a bit... is that fair? is there really a difference at this point? Any advice or opinions are wecome! Cheers

(Edit: when I said “cheating” I meant cheating our agreement, not infidelity.)

as i was reading about your ground rules I knew straight away that will not last as when they are enjoy this new sex kissing starts automatic and at the heighten part of sex they both won't it in with out condoms on ,it will happen it cant be helped

 

[Nymedic81]

If you are not comfortable with it then don’t let her do it! One being a mental thing which is that you are her main guy and should be cuming in her and not other men black or white! Rules are put in place for both you and her. Some rules are meant to be broken but I’m telling you unless the guy is a regular and totally exclusive to just fucking your girl there is no gaurentee that he is STD free or safe! Secondly being both mental and some unknown physical aspect is that the guy is cumming inside your woman which is putting a part of himself inside her! Which has not been proven but from experience cumming in women makes them more in love with the person. Like I’m saying I don’t think there is any reliable science backing that but from experience I think it’s something! If she wants to keep playing then enforce the rule of condom use! Both for yours and hers protection. Especially if she’s pregnant you don’t want her getting herpes which could effect the health and delivery of your baby. Yes is it exciting probably for her to feel him to cum inside her but it’s not worth the risk! If she does this without your permission then divorce her and move on it’s not worth being with someone who doesn’t respect the ground rules and jeopardize yours, hers and the unborn baby’s health over an fantasy! Good luck and hope everything works out! Also 90% of the people on this site are fake fantasy people so don’t take everything as genuine or the right thing to do!

 

[MacNfries]

U obviously meant it by saying that “well hung” black guys can hurt the baby because of a bigger penis

well, your "obvious assumption" would be wrong.

 

[WillandSusn]

well, your "obvious assumption" would be wrong.

VWE BBC banging away as they are inclined to go. would not be good. Might separate the fetus from the lining of the womb

 

[zvega]

Haha that sounds fun, but she’s brought that up on her own before, I won’t use my wish on sumthin she might do on her own! As I said in another reply above, I thought 2 do my own interracial fling. She’s not against it but she’s more jealous than me and it’s cute.

I hope you get whatever you wish for and have fun getting it! The both of you!

 

[mikeandlia]

well, your "obvious assumption" would be wrong.

I made no assumption. Ur statements in ur previous messages showed a lack of understanding of anatomy and even less of the medical opinion on the subject. I inferred that’s what u meant. Since u haven’t explained what u supposedly meant, it doesn’t help ur claim that did not imply a larger penis could “hurt” the baby, hence you OBVIOUSLY did imply it.
I have no problem with ur concern about infection, but since we’re fully aware of the risks and I explained our conditions IF we even went through with it, it’s not a major discussion point here.

 

[mikeandlia]

Some advantages to having a hotwife. Doesn't have to be humiliation and domination for either of you. Women really enjoy the bareback BBc and the lots of cum inside them. Yes you do need to keep things under control and set limits and rules. No. You don't need to go the black breeding route especially if you have other *******. We have gone through a time when women were focused on career and less on ******* but that seems to have changed as many women are now finding that career doesn't give them everything. Having ******* seems to be back. Seeing more women with ******* by different guys. Life is a long time and some women have more relationships over the 80 years.

Well call us old fashioned, there’s no interest in “breeding”. It’s definitely a sexual thing, not a desire to have children with different men, black or otherwise. If she wanted to she would tell me. I mentioned that it was suggested here and she thought I was joking. I do see how it plays into the dominant-submissive thing, that is very ******* kingdom, I guess that’s why they say “breeding”. Just curious, are u into that? And if so, what made u realize?

 

[mikeandlia]

as i was reading about your ground rules I knew straight away that will not last as when they are enjoy this new sex kissing starts automatic and at the heighten part of sex they both won't it in with out condoms on ,it will happen it cant be helped

Well she stuck to the rules the one time we did anything and it’s been quite some time since then. We’ve talked more and she seems happy watching videos and talking to me about it, since I’ve been indulging her fantasies. Things seem pretty calm now.

 

[mikeandlia]

VWE BBC banging away as they are inclined to go. would not be good. Might separate the fetus from the lining of the womb

Not sure what u mean here... I’m aware of placenta detaching, but apart from *******, high ******* pressure, etc, none of which are a concern for us, the only possible cause is severe trauma but since no one is going to punch her repeatedly in the stomach I think we’re okay with that one too

 

[mikeandlia]

If you are not comfortable with it then don’t let her do it! One being a mental thing which is that you are her main guy and should be cuming in her and not other men black or white! Rules are put in place for both you and her. Some rules are meant to be broken but I’m telling you unless the guy is a regular and totally exclusive to just fucking your girl there is no gaurentee that he is STD free or safe! Secondly being both mental and some unknown physical aspect is that the guy is cumming inside your woman which is putting a part of himself inside her! Which has not been proven but from experience cumming in women makes them more in love with the person. Like I’m saying I don’t think there is any reliable science backing that but from experience I think it’s something! If she wants to keep playing then enforce the rule of condom use! Both for yours and hers protection. Especially if she’s pregnant you don’t want her getting herpes which could effect the health and delivery of your baby. Yes is it exciting probably for her to feel him to cum inside her but it’s not worth the risk! If she does this without your permission then divorce her and move on it’s not worth being with someone who doesn’t respect the ground rules and jeopardize yours, hers and the unborn baby’s health over an fantasy! Good luck and hope everything works out! Also 90% of the people on this site are fake fantasy people so don’t take everything as genuine or the right thing to do!

Thanks for taking my side! As I said, things have calmed down a bit. And I’m not as worried but also not as bothered by it anyway. I guess hearing people talk about it made it less a big deal. The fantasy talk is fun, it’s nice to hear her talk about what she wants. It’s probably going to be fantasy all the way. In the real world and with respect to pregnancy the only real risk is disease, but that’s scary enough. Even with a recent test.
She doesn’t NEED my permission, but she would not hide it from me if she wanted to do it. If anything I’ve been more open to it and she’s the one who backed off, so that’s great for me. Sure a part of me feels a little bad that it was a fantasy that maybe she hoped I’d say yes to, but if she really wanted to do it, she’d let me know, so I’m not too worried.
90% seems high. coming here made me wonder how many people I see on the street actually do it... it’s crazy to think it’s that many. So maybe it is

 

[MacNfries]

Thanks for taking my side!

ahhhhh, that's what you wanted anyway, someone to agree with YOUR SIDE. Well, there ya go ... someone telling you what you wanted to hear.

 

[WillandSusn]

Not sure what u mean here... I’m aware of placenta detaching, but apart from *******, high ******* pressure, etc, none of which are a concern for us, the only possible cause is severe trauma but since no one is going to punch her repeatedly in the stomach I think we’re okay with that one too

No "vigourous" sex. Ie banging away at her pussy. Especially. Doggie position.

 

[WillandSusn]

Well call us old fashioned, there’s no interest in “breeding”. It’s definitely a sexual thing, not a desire to have children with different men, black or otherwise. If she wanted to she would tell me. I mentioned that it was suggested here and she thought I was joking. I do see how it plays into the dominant-submissive thing, that is very ******* kingdom, I guess that’s why they say “breeding”. Just curious, are u into that? And if so, what made u realize?

Start with the whole IR sex that seems to be popular today. Add that women want bareback and cum inside. Add that more white women now having babies by non-white men of various races. Add that more black men are ok ( no fear ) with breeding white women. Recall not so many years ago , black men in some states would find themselves hanging from a tree for sex with a white woman. Now we see young people of many races mixing in schools and neighborhoods and sports. Young white women having sex with young men of other races. Mature white women , married and single, having sex with men of other races. Pregnancy and Procreation are natures purposes for sex between adults. Pleasure is something the people discovered but only if done with skill and stamina.

 

[leanncarter]

just my opinion is she wanting to have sex with the same guy as before I would ask her to wait till the baby was born and then do it before going back on birth control like I said just my opinion

 

[mikeandlia]

ahhhhh, that's what you wanted anyway, someone to agree with YOUR SIDE. Well, there ya go ... someone telling you what you wanted to hear.

My position wasn’t hidden... of course I’ll favor those taking my side, but I’ve welcomed any well thought out opinions and I discussed things with the wife even more as a result.
I’m glad u and I can talk about something else.

 

[WillandSusn]

Thanks for taking my side! As I said, things have calmed down a bit. And I’m not as worried but also not as bothered by it anyway. I guess hearing people talk about it made it less a big deal. The fantasy talk is fun, it’s nice to hear her talk about what she wants. It’s probably going to be fantasy all the way. In the real world and with respect to pregnancy the only real risk is disease, but that’s scary enough. Even with a recent test.
She doesn’t NEED my permission, but she would not hide it from me if she wanted to do it. If anything I’ve been more open to it and she’s the one who backed off, so that’s great for me. Sure a part of me feels a little bad that it was a fantasy that maybe she hoped I’d say yes to, but if she really wanted to do it, she’d let me know, so I’m not too worried.
90% seems high. coming here made me wonder how many people I see on the street actually do it... it’s crazy to think it’s that many. So maybe it is

Mike. Need to think in terms of. " In addition too ". And not so much. "Instead of ". Lifestyle is a very long street with twists and turns and pot holes now and then. Early on she should be enjoying lots of you and him. Later on , explorations may involve more with "him" and less with you but that is how it should be as she is more exposed to BBC.