Just curious where to start ?

Out of interest, what is SLS?
Out of interest, what is SLS?
I think it's Swing Lifestyle, Its a free site (with a pay upgrade) but weve had a free account for 10 years or so. Its great because you can rate the person so youll see if they are all talk and no shows. Its kind of cheesy but like reviews from other people. It helps weed out the fakes though
 
This is new to us. I have only been with one man and I married him. For those that have done it before, where would you recommend to start? I know what I am thinking about and what interests me. But not really sure where to start and how to start slow.

I am not into husband humiliation. I don't want the individual I am playing with to criticize my husband ( I am afraid it would become violent). I have been thinking about messing around with someone, while my husband watches. It really turns me on watching him watch me.
Honestly have very little idea of how to start slow and where to start.
Start slow. I am assuming you and your husband have talked and this is a mutual desire. Go out and have some fun with it. Go out together and pick out possible men together and try and laugh and smile about it. If you haven't maybe try some role play in the bedroom along the lines of what you want. Using friends can be tricky if it goes wrong of ends up not being what you thought. If this isn't an issue maybe invite a friend over for a threesome and see how that feels. Small steps before you get into some of the stories people tell on here.
 
Start slow. I am assuming you and your husband have talked and this is a mutual desire. Go out and have some fun with it. Go out together and pick out possible men together and try and laugh and smile about it. If you haven't maybe try some role play in the bedroom along the lines of what you want. Using friends can be tricky if it goes wrong of ends up not being what you thought. If this isn't an issue maybe invite a friend over for a threesome and see how that feels. Small steps before you get into some of the stories people tell on here.
I appreciate your input. I used a friend once for a little fun. Ended really badly. From now on we decided that we will do this away from the home, away from our city,and away from anyone we will have to see constantly. We/I have been told several times there are too many rules. Oh well, I will keep window shopping and eventually I will find the perfect playtoy
 
I appreciate your input. I used a friend once for a little fun. Ended really badly. From now on we decided that we will do this away from the home, away from our city,and away from anyone we will have to see constantly. We/I have been told several times there are too many rules. Oh well, I will keep window shopping and eventually I will find the perfect playtoy
Rules in things like this are crucial and they help to keep everyone in check and keep the drama low. Stick by your guns when it comes to what makes you and your husband happy and safe.
 
For me personally I started by camming. My husband would watch me and it turned me on to know that I was turning other men on and i had the option of watching them. Then one night we decided to post as ad on CL. i know that's not an option anymore but it worked out for me many times. I was always clear in my expectations and required many verification photos. I nor my husband is into the cuckold lifestyle so whoever you choose has to know your expectations right off the bat. A little alcohol never hurt anyone either. :) the bottom line is it's not an easy process or quick process. You have to be picky with who you choose to share your body with.
 
Its always best to talk thru things before you start down this road .....have ground rules and make sure that the third party understands/adheres to them. It should be a fun fulfilling experience with no animosity or hurt feelings thats what I work towards I would feel awful if I broke up someones marriage or didnt receive the experience that they were hoping for. I always enjoy the return visits better than the initial one, everyone is more comfortable and friendships usually evolve. I am heading on a vacation next month with a couple I met on CL(I miss CL) hubby wants to golf and wifey wants unbridled sex for a week, I am looking forward to it.
 
Its certainly a gradual process and you'll find over time that you will push your boundaries further and further..

At first I was only interested in having my wife have sex with BBC behind closed doors in our bedroom when I wouldnt watch, only listen and there was no interaction or humiliation.

Now, Im getting tied to a chair and ball gagged by the bull and made to watch him give it to my wife like I never could while he talks ******* to me.

Oh how the times have changed..
 
You can learn some "lessons learned" from our profile. Four essential ingredients are: (1) Total trust between the two of you about your needs and your feelings; (2) Clear ground rules, about what you want or expect and what to do if boundaries get crossed/confused; (3) Total caution about safe sex with others outside your own relationship; and (4) Communication, communication, communication.

Feel free to write if you have other questions.
 
Try a swingers' website. You can meet singles there and they tend to know how to behave because a reputation builds quickly. You could also use it to find clubs near you for zero pressure get togethers. I would personally recommend: SDC, kasidie, and lifestylelounge. It depends on your location and the site features you like. They are usually free to create an account to get a feel.
 
Have you considered going to a house party or swing club. Just hang out and watch the action, if you feel like picking out someone to fool around with great. If not just watch, get horny, and find a private room to do what horny couples do (or an open bed if you're a exibitionist). Plenty of opportunities to play but no pressure to do so.
 
Take your time and don't let anyone rush you into doing something you aren't comfortable with. Your comfort and safety comes first. Always communicate with your husband and the potential playmate. The key to everyone having a good time is all to be on the same page. Thus talking and listening are important.

If a guy doesn't like your rules, then just go on to another guy. For this to work you must be comfortable. The first few times you meet someone you will be nervous, this is normal. Shoot I still get a little nervous and I have been doing this for several years.

Swinger Zone Central is another website you can check out. They have a free membership as well. Hope you are successful in your adventure into this lifestyle.
 
This is new to us. I have only been with one man and I married him. For those that have done it before, where would you recommend to start? I know what I am thinking about and what interests me. But not really sure where to start and how to start slow.

I am not into husband humiliation. I don't want the individual I am playing with to criticize my husband ( I am afraid it would become violent). I have been thinking about messing around with someone, while my husband watches. It really turns me on watching him watch me.
Honestly have very little idea of how to start slow and where to start.
That's very typical for new people. Talk to someone who is already in to your liking. It's hard to trust online but that's may be safer to some degree. At least we started out of our town and it helped getting things regular. Don't lose the hope. It will happen one day
 
I think it's Swing Lifestyle, Its a free site (with a pay upgrade) but weve had a free account for 10 years or so. Its great because you can rate the person so youll see if they are all talk and no shows. Its kind of cheesy but like reviews from other people. It helps weed out the fakes though
AFF has a similar system, testimonials. Years ago when I was active on AFF a member could swear by testimonials.
 
Take your time and don't let anyone rush you into doing something you aren't comfortable with. Your comfort and safety comes first. Always communicate with your husband and the potential playmate. The key to everyone having a good time is all to be on the same page. Thus talking and listening are important.

If a guy doesn't like your rules, then just go on to another guy. For this to work you must be comfortable. The first few times you meet someone you will be nervous, this is normal. Shoot I still get a little nervous and I have been doing this for several years.

Swinger Zone Central is another website you can check out. They have a free membership as well. Hope you are successful in your adventure into this lifestyle.
I agree.
Nervousness is 100% normal but don't let that stop a good time ;)
My former hotwife sub was SUPER nervous the first time we met but soon after turned into an insatiable ravenous nympho lol...

My current hotwife lover was nervous af at first.
Now she practically lives with me :devil: :blackheart::qos:
 
We always relied on swinglifestyle as free members but the rules changed with the government crack down so now unless you pay It's not much good.
 
This is new to us. I have only been with one man and I married him. For those that have done it before, where would you recommend to start? I know what I am thinking about and what interests me. But not really sure where to start and how to start slow.

I am not into husband humiliation. I don't want the individual I am playing with to criticize my husband ( I am afraid it would become violent). I have been thinking about messing around with someone, while my husband watches. It really turns me on watching him watch me.
Honestly have very little idea of how to start slow and where to start.

Since you are here on this site, I'm assuming you are interested only in having sex with a black man and I can only hope that you eventually go through with it. My only recommendation is that you are selective and make sure the black guy you meet will respect your rules in advance.. Good luck to you in finding what you are looking for. Once your first time is behind you, and you found Mister Right, I'm sure you will enjoy it where you will want to do it more and more. But be careful, having sex with a black men is very addictive.. take it from someone who knows.. lol
 
it is hard to find.... Tons of women hungry for BBC, seems tons of women not getting fed! Must be a shortage of black men on this site. Why don't they subcontract their work load to porn stars like, DFW, the diesel, flash brown, Mandingo, the prince, ECT.....???
 
This is new to us. I have only been with one man and I married him. For those that have done it before, where would you recommend to start? I know what I am thinking about and what interests me. But not really sure where to start and how to start slow.

I am not into husband humiliation. I don't want the individual I am playing with to criticize my husband ( I am afraid it would become violent). I have been thinking about messing around with someone, while my husband watches. It really turns me on watching him watch me.
Honestly have very little idea of how to start slow and where to start.
I am going to assume him and you have discussed this and are agreeing both to move forward by this point. If not that would be a good starting spot.

I'd honestly start with a simple threesome. Go out together and find someone you like and approach them (just you) and talk with them and see if you click. If you do be honest and say you are looking for a third for the night and see if they agree. That way your husband can watch you be with someone else but he is not left out and at the same time you can experience someone else and are not leaving your husband out. From there you can see where you want to take things.

I know most porn portrays being a hotwife or cuck as a white woman having sex with black men and the whole time they are telling the husband how bad he is and he sits there in a cage in the corner. This doesn't have to be the case and I think you'll find in a lot of cases it is not. Couples and people start things like this for a variety of different reasons and want different things out of it. You'll have you own reasons and you'll be seeking your own goals. Best of luck to you both!
 
Go to some tame and established meet and greet events. No pressure. No nudity or sex. Just lifestyle folks who largely know each other and were right where you two are. While you will undoubtedly sense some clique among some, you will probably find enthusiasts who will want to help you join the ranks. Be honest. Let them know what you really want and your questions and reservations. Anyone who has genuinely been in this for years has heard and seen it all. Like talking with your doctor in that way. Embarrassment is for the vanillas.
 
Once we decided she was going to do another man we went out to a local hotel bar and she picked a guy up and went to his room. The next guy she met at a local club and fucked him in my van. It quickly progressed and soon I was with her when she had other men and soon I was helping and eventually finding men. It is a learning experience and not everytime will be great but if you keep at it you will find it very much fun
 
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