we have been together four years and she cheated on me with her black coworker, and I know this isn't cuckolding. The trust has been destroyed, but the way I found out was when his girlfriend sent me a video of them making out and humping on his couch, and it disgusts me...but also really turns me on. it's been about 3 weeks since it happened, and we are trying to make things work, going to see a marriage counselor, but still in the beginning phases of counseling. Is it crazy that i am so turned on by the video, I feel ashamed after I cum, but it still gets me so hard.