....Myhunger, I imagine your desire is probably very frustrating, but it might help if you looked at your situation from a woman's point of view. Women mostly desire strong, alpha-type males who are filled with goals, are financially stable, and fit their visual physique, and maybe even equipped (anatomically) for their sexual desire. They're not out looking for men who mostly desire sharing them with other men, or who are suppressive in nature. Its sort of like you being a car salesman and the prospect comes to you wanting a truck ... you have no trucks on the lot so you persist in trying to sell them something they don't want or need.
....I'm not saying you can't eventually have a woman in your life who would like a cuckold type arrangement; basically all it is, is a one-sided, open marriage. Its just that they aren't out 'looking' for that kind of relationship initially. Its an arrangement that has to be cultured with a more liberal minded type of female or with a sexually frustrated female. So I'd be looking for a romance/relationship in which your female would enjoy occasional swinging activities, then develop that relationship into a one-sided cuckold relationship. It will take a bit more culturing and time, but its more likely you can find that special mate.
....You might wish to consider why your past female relationships failed .... this might give you a hint as to what women want and what you failed to provide them. Its funny how women & men seem to go through divorce after divorce but end up marrying another person similar to the x-spouse they divorced.