Of the many subjects regarding a woman getting into the BBC lifestyle the most common question I hear from men and women is how do they get their spouse into it? It is not a subject you bring up at the dinner table, driving down the road, or in the living room while watching television. The best way for either sex to bring it up is during sex play and they are both aroused and open to sexual ideas. That is the best time to broach the subject since they're sexually aroused and more open to creative sex ideas. The wife can be giving her man a blow job and then speak up at times about inter racial sex. She will ask him to think about what it would be like to see a black man have sex with a white women. Another way is for her to have a inter racial porn movie for them to watch. He may be against it at first, but if he can see the sexual skills of a black man with a white women there is a good chance he will become excited . If he rejects the notion, she has her answer, or can defend what white women say about it. If he asks her if that is what she wants, she can say, "I am married and in love with you, but I do find it exciting as a fantasy. And, if you wanted me to try it so you could see what it was like yes I would do that for you." These things all start with a fantasy for the couple first. They will be making love and both talk about this possibility of her having sex with a BBC as he watches. Then they cum together while they are thinking about it. This imprints the fantasy desire into the mind and starts the process of creating that strong desire from then on. The next time they have sex they revisit that fantasy, as if they are walking down a corridor of ideas. They pick up right where they left off and then expand on the idea - how it would happen, and what she would do with a BBC. Then they cum again. Now they have imprinted this strong desire with orgasms twice. This allows them to consider the fantasy as a real possibility from then on. They can then start making plans to take it to the next level and make it a reality. The same process can be done when the husband wants his wife to consider being with BBC. He discusses it with her during sex and asks her to think of it while they make love. Once she has an orgasm the imprinting process begins in the mind. She may calm down later and not give it serious consideration the next day, but she is intrigued by the idea. When they make love and think of it again, while they have an orgasm, the suggestion is reinforced and imprinted to a higher degree in the mind. At that time the husband can show her photos of BBC activity on line and videos. All he wants her to do is enjoy the fantasy for now and does not make a suggestion that she actually do this for him. But, the strong desire has been placed into the mind and she is having orgasms to the idea. She is then ready to consider it as a possibility she would consider doing for him. One of the most common things I hear from a spouse is: "He would never go for it, he would be totally against it." This means she will give up trying before she even brought up the subject. People can change. When they are presented with more information they can change their minds about something. For example, I was talking with a lady about inter racial sex and she said: "I am totally against that and would never even consider it!" Instead of responding in a negative way I showed her the photos of BBC with white women and then with one point after the other I explained how exciting it was for them and how white men were failing to take care of a woman's needs. Within 5 minutes she was turned on by the idea and had changed her mind. By the next day she had her first sex with a black man and thoroughly enjoyed it. Each situation is different for different couples. But, when it comes to their sexual health and joy it is imperative they leave no stone unturned to make each other happy. They should not hesitate to bring something up to them as a possible fantasy idea they can enjoy together. When either one of them assume they cannot say a certain thing they have doomed their own relationship. Being true to yourself and your sexual feelings is very important for a healthy and a happy relationship. Our fantasies and ideas in sex have value and should not be swept under the carpet and forgotten. Those special ideas are magical and can elevate a couple into a higher dimension of erotic pleasure. It can feed them with pleasure and enrich their lives. It stands to reason that they should explore their ideas without hesitation and develop them - so they can discover new things that give them pleasure together. If you feel you cannot share your deepest sexual desires with a spouse you may be wrongly holding back in communication or simply in the wrong relationship. In either case it is not healthy for you or your future.