Have to be present? It depends on the couple. Some couples like to have the husband present for reasons of safety, especially if the woman is meeting a man for the first time, then after a rapport and some trust has beenbuilt, the husband's presence is no longer required. Of course, for some couples, the wife playing and the husband watching is part of the whole package, so he would be there every time. And, obviously, there are some instances where the wife doesn't want the husband there, the husband has no interest in being there, andif the wife is cheating then the husband would have no idea of what's going on.