Could this go anywhere? Should it?

[ShyCuriousSteve]

My girlfriend and I have been together almost three years now and are very happy. She's 26 and I'm 25. A week or so ago we had an... interesting conversation. We were discussing new sex things we'd maybe like to try, bouncing ideas off one another and the like, and she asked if I'd ever like to watch another guy fuck her. I pretty much froze. She is very open about sex and sexuality whereas I tend to be a bit more reserved and shy, so talking about my desires is still a bit difficult. Usually I'm very open with her about what I like, she knows about my i-curiousity and other kinks, and while I've had cuckolding fantasies for quite a while, she didn't know that when she posed the question.
I mumbled something about it being something I was curious about, but I wasn't sure about acting on it just yet. And that was it, the conservation changed course and I was too nervous to bring it up again.
A few things: she has had several partners in the past, is vastly more sexually experienced and open than I am( she's my first and only sexual partner), and was previously in polyamorus relationships before me.
So right now I'm confused and anxious and excited and scared all at once. On one hand, I very definitely have submissive/cuckold fantasies; a lot. But fantasy and reality are two very different things and I'm not sure how I feel about it hypothetically happening for real. I love my girlfriend very much and I know she'd never do anything that would make me feel uncomfortable or unsafe. I guess I just don't know if this is going to go anywhere; before this my cuckold fantasies were just that and to find myself openly talking about it maybe happening is liberating, bizarre, and more than a little scary. I also don't know if it should go anywhere. As I said I'm pretty shy and nervous about most sex stuff, and this would be a lot to take in. I'm also having weird feelings of guilt that she used to be in sexually open relationships before me. It's all very confusing and I'd really appreciate any advice I can get!

 

[Kenneth]

My girlfriend and I have been together almost three years now and are very happy. She's 26 and I'm 25. A week or so ago we had an... interesting conversation. We were discussing new sex things we'd maybe like to try, bouncing ideas off one another and the like, and she asked if I'd ever like to watch another guy fuck her. I pretty much froze. She is very open about sex and sexuality whereas I tend to be a bit more reserved and shy, so talking about my desires is still a bit difficult. Usually I'm very open with her about what I like, she knows about my i-curiousity and other kinks, and while I've had cuckolding fantasies for quite a while, she didn't know that when she posed the question.
I mumbled something about it being something I was curious about, but I wasn't sure about acting on it just yet. And that was it, the conservation changed course and I was too nervous to bring it up again.
A few things: she has had several partners in the past, is vastly more sexually experienced and open than I am( she's my first and only sexual partner), and was previously in polyamorus relationships before me.
So right now I'm confused and anxious and excited and scared all at once. On one hand, I very definitely have submissive/cuckold fantasies; a lot. But fantasy and reality are two very different things and I'm not sure how I feel about it hypothetically happening for real. I love my girlfriend very much and I know she'd never do anything that would make me feel uncomfortable or unsafe. I guess I just don't know if this is going to go anywhere; before this my cuckold fantasies were just that and to find myself openly talking about it maybe happening is liberating, bizarre, and more than a little scary. I also don't know if it should go anywhere. As I said I'm pretty shy and nervous about most sex stuff, and this would be a lot to take in. I'm also having weird feelings of guilt that she used to be in sexually open relationships before me. It's all very confusing and I'd really appreciate any advice I can get!

I Think you are in for a very interesting ride... You have fantasies you are afraid to express but they are very much there, you just are not sure you should dare...
She has desires that are much stronger for her to restrain than you may think... From what you say she has much more sexual experience and doesn't want to give up on those things that obviously excite and stimulate her... She will do them with or without you but it sounds like she wants you along and sharing these sexual pleasures she craves...
I would suggest that you take what you wrote to us and rewrite it to her expressing first your secret fantasies as well as your reservations. Tell her that you love her and that you also support her in those desires she has... Perhaps she is a little frustrated with your sexual reservations and wants you to open up your sexuality. Join her in her desires and enjoy them with her... Don't try to restrain her raging tiger, join her in the tiger cage

 

[ShyCuriousSteve]

I Think you are in for a very interesting ride... You have fantasies you are afraid to express but they are very much there, you just are not sure you should dare...
She has desires that are much stronger for her to restrain than you may think... From what you say she has much more sexual experience and doesn't want to give up on those things that obviously excite and stimulate her... She will do them with or without you but it sounds like she wants you along and sharing these sexual pleasures she craves...
I would suggest that you take what you wrote to us and rewrite it to her expressing first your secret fantasies as well as your reservations. Tell her that you love her and that you also support her in those desires she has... Perhaps she is a little frustrated with your sexual reservations and wants you to open up your sexuality. Join her in her desires and enjoy them with her... Don't try to restrain her raging tiger, join her in the tiger cage

She's always been very open and encouraging towards me and making sure I feel safe and accepted in discussing sexuality and specifically my sexual desires with her. 99% of the time, I'm completely comfortable telling her things I like or am curious about and in fact I now openly talk about and do things with her that I was cripplingly ashamed of, nervous about, or both, just a few yews ago. I know she's a bit frustrated my my sexual reservations at times, but I don't think she'd ever cheat on me or do anything that would hurt me without my knowledge.
I definitely don't want to hold her back from doing what makes her happy and fulfilled, but at the same time I don;t want to engage in anything that would be too much for either me or our relationship. But on the flip side if there was anyone in the world who could make the possibility of this actually happening if we were to do it together, it'd be her.

 

[CuriousBlake]

You're in an enviable situation.
If it's something that turns you both on -- go for it!

 

[Irishboy81]

Appreciate you have a woman who is comfortable and willing to discuss the possibilities and don't feel guilty about your cuckold thoughts it's nothing to be ashamed about and I think you will be surprised by her reaction when you tell her.

 

[goodblkdick10]

I have seen people on here that watch IR movies to ease into the situation. Just saying!

 

[ShyCuriousSteve]

You're in an enviable situation.
If it's something that turns you both on -- go for it!

I guess I'm in a somewhat rare position in that I'm the hesitant one and she's the one who's more open to the idea lol. I'm definitely not missing out on that, but I guess I don't want that to lead me to rush into something.

Appreciate you have a woman who is comfortable and willing to discuss the possibilities and don't feel guilty about your cuckold thoughts it's nothing to be ashamed about and I think you will be surprised by her reaction when you tell her.

You're very right. At the very least I should appreciate how open and accepting she's always been of my and my sexuality. And I should trust her enough to not feel bad about telling her that I do have these fantasies.

I have seen people on here that watch IR movies to ease into the situation. Just saying!

That could definitely be a fun way to 'dip our toes in the water' so to speak!

 

[Kenneth]

Try combining my suggestion on writing it out with the movie suggestion. Sit down one evening and write out you thoughts and fantasies on this topic and half way through the movie give her what you wrote. Perhaps combine that with some wine and candlelight and maybe sex. Let her know you're nervous about it all. Ask her to go slow, maybe start with a threesome with a black man.
Watching my wife fucking another man with my permission and encouragement for the first time was extremely liberating.

 

[ShyCuriousSteve]

Try combining my suggestion on writing it out with the movie suggestion. Sit down one evening and write out you thoughts and fantasies on this topic and half way through the movie give her what you wrote. Perhaps combine that with some wine and candlelight and maybe sex. Let her know you're nervous about it all. Ask her to go slow, maybe start with a threesome with a black man.
Watching my wife fucking another man with my permission and encouragement for the first time was extremely liberating.

Well, I do love some candlelit, wine-infused, romantic sex. And I guess adding in some relevant videos could make that a lot of fun and a way to talk about all of this.
I think asking that we would start slow is a given, and I'm liking the idea of maybe starting off with a threesome first.

 

[ShyCuriousSteve]

Well, we talked about it! It was actually her that brought it up again, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I was deadly nervous at first, I could barely speak. But it went really well once we got into conversation.
Basically, she's not at all surprised that I have had these kinds of fantasies before, and is actually supper supportive and encouraging; again I guess I shouldn't be surprised. She's said she's interested in her part partly out of missing her old polyamorus lifestyle and the variety of sexual partners that offered her but that she very much loves me and has zero desire to cheat, which is emminsely relieving to her.
She's said she doesn't want to jump into anything too quickly, mostly for my sake which I appreciate.
I feel surprisingly less anxious now that it's kinda all out in the open. I'm still not sure really how to move forward or what's going to happen next, but at the very least it felt good to talk about it with her.

 

[MacNfries]

....Steve, I'd move slowly on this if it is an option. She has a definite advantage over you ... "experience" ... way, way more. Plus, you say you're shy or reluctant to discuss this topic with her, which indicates to me that your relationship hasn't matured to that trust level.
....Thing is, if she's becoming the least bit bored with your lack of experience or ingenuity, she's probably going to occasionally cheat on you anyways. Hopefully both of you see a value in each other that extents beyond SEX, but at your ages, sex is tremendously important to the both of you ... she's just way ahead of you in what she might wish to experience.
....The movies, and sex toys, and fantasy play will only get you so far. You got to get up to speed with her on performance. Learning ALL of her erogenous zones, paying close attention to foreplay, and how to give her g-spot orgasms might move you up in her standards. I don't care how big a guy's dick is, if he's not focused on her pleasure zones, other than her pussy, he's gonna become boring to her eventually. But, the whole point of this cuckolding fantasy play is to re-elevate the sensualities between the two of you and/or provide her something that you can't possibly give her. You'll go through a ton of emotions (I call it the emotional power pill) as you watch your lady have orgasm after orgasm on some other guy's cock ... but, if its like its been with my wife & me, for days and even weeks later we go sexually at each other constantly as we relive the HIGH of watching her take another man's cock.
....Best of luck ... Mac

 

[dakotdik]

I don't think you have to do anything to move forward, just give her permission and she will find a partner. But! I wouldn't give her permission until you reflected on the idea of whether you want a polyamorous relationship or a cuckolding relationship and whether you can handle the feelings of jealousy. For me, I know I can set aside the feeling of jealousy as long as my partner makes spending time with me important. If you can't stop jealousy of her relationship with another partner then this is not the lifestyle for you. Now, do you want a polyamorous relationship where you are a full partner in romantic relationships with others or are you willing to play a secondary role while she finds sexual fulfillment elsewhere? Years ago, I was with a woman who said that she wanted a polyamorous relationship, but when we brought in a third, she became jealous and it destroyed our primary relationship. It is not only a question of how you will react, but how will she react. I know of another polyamorous relationship where the exact same thing happened. You both need to reflect on and be at ease with your partner having romantic feelings with someone else. It is one thing to have a "hotwife" who sleeps with a bull once a month, but it is another thing to share a household with her lover every day. It can work, but you can't count on any support from friends and family, so you need to consider what this will mean beyond the sexual fantasy.

 

[CuriousBlake]

Well, we talked about it! It was actually her that brought it up again, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I was deadly nervous at first, I could barely speak. But it went really well once we got into conversation.
Basically, she's not at all surprised that I have had these kinds of fantasies before, and is actually supper supportive and encouraging; again I guess I shouldn't be surprised. She's said she's interested in her part partly out of missing her old polyamorus lifestyle and the variety of sexual partners that offered her but that she very much loves me and has zero desire to cheat, which is emminsely relieving to her.
She's said she doesn't want to jump into anything too quickly, mostly for my sake which I appreciate.
I feel surprisingly less anxious now that it's kinda all out in the open. I'm still not sure really how to move forward or what's going to happen next, but at the very least it felt good to talk about it with her.

That's awesome! Damn I'm jealous. She must really want it if she brought it up again.

Why did she say she's not surprised you have these fantasies?
If you don't mind me asking, is it because you're small?

That's how a past girlfriend found out I was into it

 

[ShyCuriousSteve]

....Steve, I'd move slowly on this if it is an option. She has a definite advantage over you ... "experience" ... way, way more. Plus, you say you're shy or reluctant to discuss this topic with her, which indicates to me that your relationship hasn't matured to that trust level.
....Thing is, if she's becoming the least bit bored with your lack of experience or ingenuity, she's probably going to occasionally cheat on you anyways. Hopefully both of you see a value in each other that extents beyond SEX, but at your ages, sex is tremendously important to the both of you ... she's just way ahead of you in what she might wish to experience.
....The movies, and sex toys, and fantasy play will only get you so far. You got to get up to speed with her on performance. Learning ALL of her erogenous zones, paying close attention to foreplay, and how to give her g-spot orgasms might move you up in her standards. I don't care how big a guy's dick is, if he's not focused on her pleasure zones, other than her pussy, he's gonna become boring to her eventually. But, the whole point of this cuckolding fantasy play is to re-elevate the sensualities between the two of you and/or provide her something that you can't possibly give her. You'll go through a ton of emotions (I call it the emotional power pill) as you watch your lady have orgasm after orgasm on some other guy's cock ... but, if its like its been with my wife & me, for days and even weeks later we go sexually at each other constantly as we relive the HIGH of watching her take another man's cock.
....Best of luck ... Mac

Moving slowly is kind of a given. She's been nothing but patient and kind with me about my warming up to anything else sexual. And she;s made it clear she doesn't want to put me off by doing anything too

....Steve, I'd move slowly on this if it is an option. She has a definite advantage over you ... "experience" ... way, way more. Plus, you say you're shy or reluctant to discuss this topic with her, which indicates to me that your relationship hasn't matured to that trust level.
....Thing is, if she's becoming the least bit bored with your lack of experience or ingenuity, she's probably going to occasionally cheat on you anyways. Hopefully both of you see a value in each other that extents beyond SEX, but at your ages, sex is tremendously important to the both of you ... she's just way ahead of you in what she might wish to experience.
....The movies, and sex toys, and fantasy play will only get you so far. You got to get up to speed with her on performance. Learning ALL of her erogenous zones, paying close attention to foreplay, and how to give her g-spot orgasms might move you up in her standards. I don't care how big a guy's dick is, if he's not focused on her pleasure zones, other than her pussy, he's gonna become boring to her eventually. But, the whole point of this cuckolding fantasy play is to re-elevate the sensualities between the two of you and/or provide her something that you can't possibly give her. You'll go through a ton of emotions (I call it the emotional power pill) as you watch your lady have orgasm after orgasm on some other guy's cock ... but, if its like its been with my wife & me, for days and even weeks later we go sexually at each other constantly as we relive the HIGH of watching her take another man's cock.
....Best of luck ... Mac

Thank you for all the advice. We do very much love and value each other for many many reasons beyond just sex, so no worries there!
And I think moving slow is s given. Since day one she's been nothing but patient with me and she's very aware of some of my sexual hesitations and has often been more in tune than I am as to bringing my out of my shell at the right lace so that I try things she knows I'll like, but still might scare me a bit.

That's awesome! Damn I'm jealous. She must really want it if she brought it up again.

Why did she say she's not surprised you have these fantasies?
If you don't mind me asking, is it because you're small?

That's how a past girlfriend found out I was into it

Well I can't say I think it's anything to with my size, at least, that hasn't really come up.
I think she wasn't surprised because I have a very submissive sexuality, she knows that most of my fantasies are of the submissive role, so it just kind of makes sense I suppose.

 

[Hansjensen]

My girlfriend and I have been together almost three years now and are very happy. She's 26 and I'm 25. A week or so ago we had an... interesting conversation. We were discussing new sex things we'd maybe like to try, bouncing ideas off one another and the like, and she asked if I'd ever like to watch another guy fuck her. I pretty much froze. She is very open about sex and sexuality whereas I tend to be a bit more reserved and shy, so talking about my desires is still a bit difficult. Usually I'm very open with her about what I like, she knows about my i-curiousity and other kinks, and while I've had cuckolding fantasies for quite a while, she didn't know that when she posed the question.
I mumbled something about it being something I was curious about, but I wasn't sure about acting on it just yet. And that was it, the conservation changed course and I was too nervous to bring it up again.
A few things: she has had several partners in the past, is vastly more sexually experienced and open than I am( she's my first and only sexual partner), and was previously in polyamorus relationships before me.
So right now I'm confused and anxious and excited and scared all at once. On one hand, I very definitely have submissive/cuckold fantasies; a lot. But fantasy and reality are two very different things and I'm not sure how I feel about it hypothetically happening for real. I love my girlfriend very much and I know she'd never do anything that would make me feel uncomfortable or unsafe. I guess I just don't know if this is going to go anywhere; before this my cuckold fantasies were just that and to find myself openly talking about it maybe happening is liberating, bizarre, and more than a little scary. I also don't know if it should go anywhere. As I said I'm pretty shy and nervous about most sex stuff, and this would be a lot to take in. I'm also having weird feelings of guilt that she used to be in sexually open relationships before me. It's all very confusing and I'd really appreciate any advice I can get!

Every cuckold knows the feelings that you mention:

" I'm confused and anxious and excited and scared all at once."

That was the way I felt when we started cuckolding. Fortunately my wife put some pressure on me. I love being an interracial cuckold. It has been extremely rewarding!

 

[ShyCuriousSteve]

Every cuckold knows the feelings that you mention:

" I'm confused and anxious and excited and scared all at once."

That was the way I felt when we started cuckolding. Fortunately my wife put some pressure on me. I love being an interracial cuckold. It has been extremely rewarding!

View attachment 1538981

It's actually hugely relieving to know that not only I'm not alone but that my feelings are 'natural' to an extent for a budding cuckold.

We're taking it slowly but... surely. It's started with more revealing dress while we're out, then some sly flirting at bars and stuff, then more comfortably open flirting, and recently at a Halloween party she flashed her tits to for the room to see at the suggestion of a guy, that was a shocker lol but it was really hot. So now we're trying to get more comfortable with the idea of maybe seeing if we're ready to make those next steps. It's exciting but... nerve wracking. We're planning on getting engaged soon so we're asking a lot of questions about if this is the right time to be getting into this sort of thing.

 

[Hansjensen]

It's actually hugely relieving to know that not only I'm not alone but that my feelings are 'natural' to an extent for a budding cuckold.

We're taking it slowly but... surely. It's started with more revealing dress while we're out, then some sly flirting at bars and stuff, then more comfortably open flirting, and recently at a Halloween party she flashed her tits to for the room to see at the suggestion of a guy, that was a shocker lol but it was really hot. So now we're trying to get more comfortable with the idea of maybe seeing if we're ready to make those next steps. It's exciting but... nerve wracking. We're planning on getting engaged soon so we're asking a lot of questions about if this is the right time to be getting into this sort of thing.

That's great to hear!

 

[Luckycuck69]

It's actually hugely relieving to know that not only I'm not alone but that my feelings are 'natural' to an extent for a budding cuckold.

We're taking it slowly but... surely. It's started with more revealing dress while we're out, then some sly flirting at bars and stuff, then more comfortably open flirting, and recently at a Halloween party she flashed her tits to for the room to see at the suggestion of a guy, that was a shocker lol but it was really hot. So now we're trying to get more comfortable with the idea of maybe seeing if we're ready to make those next steps. It's exciting but... nerve wracking. We're planning on getting engaged soon so we're asking a lot of questions about if this is the right time to be getting into this sort of thing.

You're definitely in a unique place. Many guys on here strive to be in your position. As long as you and your woman agree and grow together it shouldn't matter. I recently bought my gf her second black dildo and we are moving at a very slow pace to some but a perfect pace for us. She just needs to respect your boundaries and you respect her's. Sounds like you two have a good thing going and should keep it up.