Cougar at my job

I have had a few experiences with older white women before, but it is one that was recently hired at my job and I can not tell if she is interested in BBC. I usually KNOW but she is hard to read. How should I approach this to feel her out to see if I can "FEEL" her out? Lol
 
I have had a few experiences with older white women before, but it is one that was recently hired at my job and I can not tell if she is interested in BBC. I usually KNOW but she is hard to read. How should I approach this to feel her out to see if I can "FEEL" her out? Lol
@King Ding 96 - yo whats good my dude. Well your post piqued my curiosity. I got a few questions for you. First without revealing too much of your personal B.I. as you don't want to do that on the Internet, what kind of line of work are you and this cougar chic in (food service, entertainment, construction, etc.)?

How old are you and hold old do you think she is? Do you know if she is married (any ring on her finger)?

Just like in the game of chess which requires strategy with an opening/middle/end game so is the same with approaching a woman, opening her, captivating her, building attraction with her, hooking her, then closing which is getting her to go out with you/ fuck/ marry you, or what have you.

So the questions I asked you would give me an idea on how to tell you to approach her. The setting should be ideal, but you don't want to wait too long do this either and give her the wrong signals. Plus you need to think about how this could impact your job such as any possible uncomfortable work environment it could cause if you two don't hit it off, could she complain of harrassment, etc.? Think of the risks?

I would suggest it be better to approach her outside of work, especially if your office has happy hour, or any other place you may happen to run into her as she would be more relaxed and not conscientious of who around at the office may be watching, what they may think, etc. Any holiday parties coming up, those are great times to move in and strike when people are more jovial.

Just reply here, no need to P/M as i don't P/M with dudes on ******* like this otherwise I would get a hundred messages and I would need to start a 1-800 number and charge them for the consulting advice (trust me I had a few guys beg me to talk to other women for them -******* is annoying).

GO GET EM YOUNG TIGER-CUB!
~BBB76

 
Ok, nah mania not going to pm lol nh I'm 24. She is mid 40s. We work in sales for a WELL known bank. we may have a happy hour I'm only a little in myself. not married
 
Inappropriate or not, A LOT of hook ups come of meeting someone in the workplace. Just take it slow and watch her reaction. Don't act like you're trying to pick her up in a club, but don't ignore her either. Let her decide. Watch for physical closeness. If she is comfortable being physically close to you and initiates situations in which she is, that's a GOOD sign.;):D
 
Becareful. Its bad luck to date woman you work with. And quadruply dangerous to flirt with them on the job. You're setting yourself up for a harassment charge,
Inappropriate or not, A LOT of hook ups come of meeting someone in the workplace. Just take it slow and watch her reaction. Don't act like you're trying to pick her up in a club, but don't ignore her either. Let her decide. Watch for physical closeness. If she is comfortable being physically close to you and initiates situations in which she is, that's a GOOD sign.;):D

Alot of hot hookups most definitely do occur at the workplace all of the time and most end up just fine more so probably than ones that don't but you only hear about the bad ones because bad news sells and some people just dwell on negativity in the world. There is risk involved in everything in life and the really successful people are the ones who know how to asses, mitigate, and eliminate as much risk as possible in whatever undertaking they pursue in life. That's how a pragmatist and realist view the world.

There are hundreds of stories I could relay here about work place hook-ups that ended up fine as Ive known and seen many. Bill Clinton Monica Lewisky's happen all the time (without the dress incident), but a real one good one is when Bill Gates met his wife at his workplace and she rejected him the first time he asked her out on the job. You can the read story here:
http://www.businessinsider.com/melinda-gates-turned-bill-gates-down-2015-3

@King Ding 96 - So you both are Banksters thats cool. Yeah reamain cordial with her at work and definitely don't get into any discussions of a sexual nature. Unless you can clearly see her checking you out there is no way your going to be able to tell what she is thinking without drawing it out of her by engaging her in other subtle ways during some conversations and watch for her body language queues. The body and eyes are always a dead give-away as people can lie with words but unless they are a zen master at stillness the body doesn't lie. I definitely suggest to do make moves on her outside of work where you can both be more relaxed as at a Bank you definitely want to keep a professional image at all times.

And if something does happen just hit it and quit it, keep it physical don't get emotions all caught up and if you do get emotions involved and it gets serious change branches you work at, just don't work at the same place so it doesn't affect work.
 
Is it worth it to be terminated because of a harrasment complaint? One roll in the sack with her and she falls in live with you and you dont want that. Then she tells HR a different story.

Not worth it.
 
To each his own, all HR reports are investigated for validity and false claims with no factual proof are dismissed. So long as you two are friendly at the work place and you don't aggressively pursue her there nor engage in any conversations of a sexual, religious, or political mater on the job you can avoid causing any offense. Some people have a rule not to mess with co-workers and thats fine and you should respect that. Then others (especially women) know how to handle their business and still handle their personal affairs and never get the two crossed with no problems.

I would proceed to talk to her outside of work and see what happens. Again I've done this countless times, even had a few women I worked with approach me about hooking up and it actually improved things at work when the women were alot more relaxed, less stressed which is sometimes why they do it, and it ultimately improved there work performance too as they act less bitchy. When you understand that most people meet their Significant Other or people they date through their personal social networks (i.e. school, work, church, etc.) this is just a natural occurence and if a person's only social network is through their job then that's where they might find their hook-ups.

There is a difference between people who've done this and seen this done which you never hear about when things go right and you only hear about things when someone screws up and things go wrong. I've known, and seen people fucking at different locations at the work site as well all the time but they both sticked and moved, don't linger. Yeah if you put it on her too good she might get crazy so make sure neither of you fall all in love and if you do like I said switch departments far away from each other and it can work. Again even those times when something has gone wrong are very far and few between all of the ones Ive seen go right - but you must feel her out first. People love to have sex and alot of it when there is attraction whether they work with each other or not. Its human nature. So long as your not subordinate or supervising someone you pursue a romantic tryst with there are no hard left or right lane lines not to cross when you both act like mature and intelligent adults with a healthy sexual desire to be fulfilled. Its only just sex, physical- make it nothing more.

Oh and on a last note, don't make it obvious where the whole office knows either. One of my experiences I had my supervisor knew about it but he even helped me to make it work because he knew the lady needed to take the edge off as our work was stressful and this was with one of the woman who approached me about hooking up. When I first had met her on the job she had just looked at me for a long time like she was tranquilized and hypnotized and I knew right way that her and i could get into trouble but not in a bad way. We did our thing, talked on the office phone openly about it as she worked in a different area but guys in my office knew her and we never had any problems. She used to joke with me and say is my husband there when a co-worker would answer the phone and then she would ask when am I going to come down to her area and see her. I told my supervisor she asked about me coming down to her area, he'd wink at me and said lets plan that when there is some downtime and we made the arrangements. A few of my other co-workers teased us about it too and said that we acted like a married couple. It was real short-lived the way it should be, never got too serious.

Anyway, keep your personal affairs outside of work, don't bring what you do outside of work into work and don't take your work home either. Thats my mantra and its worked for me.
 
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It just isnt worth it to have HR investigate you period. Many firms will fire both just to settle the issue.

Stay away from people you work with.
Stay away from woman you go to school with.

because of the Obama Justice Dept, the presumption is that men are guilty and will be found guilty in a kangaroo court just to prove a point.
 
@King Ding 96;
And the thread below just proves my point that alot of people are fucking on their co-workers on the job everyday and enjoying it. Do what works for you if you have an opportunity that presents itself and your bold enough to seize it in smartly manner. Alot of things happen afterwork also at the office happy hours too - I know. ;)

In fact one of my stick men i grew up with works as an EMS tech in NY, not only was fucking his hot spanish co-worker who he alternated driving the EMS truck with everyday, but they winded up having a baby together and are still together now for over 5 years.

https://www.blacktowhite.net/threads/ever-fucked-at-the-work-office.47120/

The complex "REAL mans" guide to sleeping with a co-worker without sabotaging your career;
http://www.complex.com/pop-culture/2014/01/a-guide-to-sleeping-with-your-co-workers/

And a report from one of my favorite Business news aggregators:

--People overwhelmingly agreed that sleeping with coworkers should be allowed, and even more people agreed that hooking up with colleagues you don't work directly with was a-OK. More specifically, over 50 percent of people said that sleeping with coworkers is fine as long as it's "handled professionally" and doesn't involve an innapropriate power dynamic. Contrary to the "don't sh*t where you eat" truism we often hear, only 10 percent of people said that they thought sex with coworkers was always a bad idea.

--Participants were much less permissive when it came to to sleeping with one's subordinates. Sixty-four percent of participants said that manager-employee sexy time shouldn't happen.

--The vast majority of participants said they have been attracted to someone they work with (about 90 percent of participants), and 64 percent have made a move on a coworker. However, over 50 percent of people reported not pursuing someone because of the work connection.

--People perceive that sleeping with coworkers is less common than it actually is. Thirty-nine percent of participants surmised that 20-40 percent of their coworkers had hooked up with another coworker, while 24 percent guessed that the statistic was somewhat lower or higher. In reality, over 50 percent of people reported having slept with someone they worked with.

ref: http://www.businessinsider.com/sex-at-work-survey-results-2013-5?op=1

 
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