Conservative life style white wife wanted to discreetly explore this lifestyle

#1
Hi everyone,

I am 48 years old and have been married to the same guy since I was 18. Love him very much and don't want to hurt him. I need to be very discreet. I am wondering what I have missed in life. We have a very conservative lifestyle so I am using my maiden name so that our friends don't find out about this.

I am struggling with my desires and fantasies all along knowing that this is not really appropriate for me and my beliefs.

Wondering if others have been through something like this and what type of emotional toll it takes and if you can so something and be discreet about it.

Hope this makes sense.

Janice
 
#5
Decisions, decisions, decisions. We all deal with that everyday. In your case, I can understand your desire to want to explore your inner curiosity. Some people act on it, while others continue to wonder, what if. I've traveled that road that you are considering, and yes it can be pretty rocky at times. Being married for as long as you have been, I would guess that although you love your husband very much, your bored, and you want to try something new. Living a secret life, along with your private life, is not as easy as some might think. It takes planning, covering your tracks, and the ability to juggle both of them without one, wearing yourself out emotionally, and two, not changing habits or adding new ones to your private life.

YOU have to decide if living a secret live and maybe getting caught, is worth the moment. Try talking to your husband, in a roundabout way of course, and get a feel as to if he might be okay with what you are feeling. I realize that will not be easy, but can be helpful in making your decision. I, for one, wish you nothing but success in your quest to find your inner desires. Have fun and be careful.
 

blackmeat

Male
Real Person
Gold Member
From
IL, US
#6
Hi everyone,

I am 48 years old and have been married to the same guy since I was 18. Love him very much and don't want to hurt him. I need to be very discreet. I am wondering what I have missed in life. We have a very conservative lifestyle so I am using my maiden name so that our friends don't find out about this.

I am struggling with my desires and fantasies all along knowing that this is not really appropriate for me and my beliefs.

Wondering if others have been through something like this and what type of emotional toll it takes and if you can so something and be discreet about it.

Hope this makes sense.

Janice
Yes Janice,

You're making sense. Congratulations for thirty years of marriage with the man you have always loved! Welcome to the human race and exploring "something new", sensually taboo (by societal standards), and untested. You are "normal" to have some anxiety about something like this. We too DO value discretion, EMPHATICALLY so, at this Site and we do not wish to create unnecessary "drama", as a member desires to explore this "new" lifestyle, which ACTUALLY has been around for centuries, it just has not been made "popular" or widely "accepted" until a few decades ago, and even as an acceptable, legitimate "lifestyle" until a little over fifteen years ago.

I hope our community offers a place where you can intimately see and explore your personal questions, find their respective "answers", through the topical or visual aspects of our numerous threads, pictures, conversations and forums and that you visits will comfort you as you embark on this new "journey".

Welcome to the community!

Alex,
a.k.a. "blackmeat",
U.S. Administrator,
blacktowhite.net
 

Mariposa blanca

Female
Real Person
Gold Member
From
Canada
#8
Hi Janice,

I have been there and know exactly what you're going through. Feel free to check out my blog for some of my thoughts and experiences with the whole thing (link is on my profile page).

Inbox me and we can exchange our Yahoo messenger information. Maybe a chat will help.

MB
 
#10
i had always been a fantasy of mine but never asked or pursued until hubby woke up one night with a dirty dream and now here we are. i have been married 19yrs and we have had a wonderful sex life and he always makes love to me and his cock and tongue. oooooo im getting wet just thinking about hubby. but know i get to Fuck and its so wonderfully dirty and arousing and its funny but BBC lover and hubby get along so well. they are almost alike. we have taken our sex life to a whole new level. and still going strong.


love Cin.
 
#11
cinfran.jpg hubby is my soul mate and from day one we have always been open and honest and find out what turns us on and off. sexual or non sexual. hubby has always been the dirty one. introduce slowly, toys, talk role playing, watching porn. porn? get your fanasty porn slowly show him what turns you on. lol i'm telling you this but this is what hubby has taught me and what we discuss with friends. we have friends that envy our sex life and only a few know what we do. just a hunch but if you know what please your hubby and you work on him then you may get what you want. lol.
 
#12
Hi everyone,

I am 48 years old and have been married to the same guy since I was 18. Love him very much and don't want to hurt him. I need to be very discreet. I am wondering what I have missed in life. We have a very conservative lifestyle so I am using my maiden name so that our friends don't find out about this.

I am struggling with my desires and fantasies all along knowing that this is not really appropriate for me and my beliefs.

Wondering if others have been through something like this and what type of emotional toll it takes and if you can so something and be discreet about it.

Hope this makes sense.

Janice
Janice,...welcome and rest assured your feelings are familair to us all

Keith

Atlanta
 
#15
View attachment 313272 hubby is my soul mate and from day one we have always been open and honest and find out what turns us on and off. sexual or non sexual. hubby has always been the dirty one. introduce slowly, toys, talk role playing, watching porn. porn? get your fanasty porn slowly show him what turns you on. lol i'm telling you this but this is what hubby has taught me and what we discuss with friends. we have friends that envy our sex life and only a few know what we do. just a hunch but if you know what please your hubby and you work on him then you may get what you want. lol.
Awesome pic of the two of you. Never would have thought you were into BBC but then again, never judge a book by it's cover. I think couples like you are what this site is all about.