Changes in a woman's sexual needs as she gets older

Angelyn said:
When younger, I could never understand other girls who blatantly lust after guys. I was literally the type of bespectacled nerd who didn’t have much interest in men. I didn’t feel that much need for sex, so it was very easy for me to build a lifestyle where men weren’t a big part.

I really don’t know where it started, but yes, I did start watching porn, and I just got hooked over time.

What makes it a bit galling and inexplicable, is that I find myself gravitating towards the most hardcore, most degrading, and generally least ‘female friendly’ porn. I’m very sure most of my porn, if not all, is male centered and mostly male POV. But I can’t help it; I really want men to be strong, powerful, virile, dominant. Gentle kisses and tender hugs doesn’t boil my *******. I have zero interest in mating with sweet, soppy guys. I find that humiliation, indignity, outrageous treatment is more likely to boil my *******. One of my favorite positions in all porn is heads down, ass up. My least favorite positions are generally female superior.

I wonder if this is because I am now living a fairly male life – semi nomadic, unsettled, rootless, alone. I am not in any kind of domestic arrangement with children and childcare and anything that bestirs my ‘mommy’ instincts. Possibly that leads to a different level of testesterone production. I would probably be a different type of woman if I was living in a sorority like situation with a bunch of other girls around me?
Click to expand...
Perhaps you might be a late bloomer?
 
Looking at the most viewed categories, it does seem that I’m in good company. I’ve never considered myself a lesbian or bisexual, even though I don’t consider a porn scene complete without two women trading (preferably cum filled) kisses.

And as I get older, I get more confident with what I feel deep down inside. Now I understand why I could never have a good long term relationship with a man. This patriarchal institute of marriage locks women into servitude to men.

I simply cannot accept picking up a man’s socks after him. I know it sounds simplistic, but that’s all that is to it. I don’t want to be someone’s mom.
 
It’s my perspective that women are naturally bisexual. That’s the necessary component of Polygamy. If 2 women are to share a man equally then it’s only fair that the man shares the 2 women equally amongst one another.
 
Angelyn said:
Hi folks

I have wanted to write this article for a long time. Finally I psyched myself into writing it.

I am hoping to stimulate some discussion. I have no objection to the moderators moving this article to any thread where they deem more appropriate.


OK I’ll get to the point. It’s a point I hate dwelling on and will understandably often skirt, but it is really important to me and affects me more than I normally confess to.

I’m getting older.

Apart from other changes in my life and body, I also notice that my sexual fantasies are changing. In fact, not just changing, but changing a lot.

I’m not the same girl I was. My sexual identity is changing in ways that I don’t understand. This definitely affects how I react to the porn that I like to watch so much.

Maybe I am nearing menopause and my hormones are changing. But I am very far from being hot tempered or emotionally volatile yet. I don’t think my hormone levels have gone out of control. It’s just a vague sense that I seem to be turning more masculine in my sexual urges.

One of the things that I’ve become mildly obsessed with, is inspecting my face for facial hair because I’m convinced that as my sexual desires become more ‘male’ due to increased levels of testesterone, I should get more facial hair. Actually none of that has happened yet.

So what’s going on?

I find myself increasingly being turned on by things that I would have been turned off by when younger. Usually it is the kind of thing that teenage males like. (At least, that's what I believe teenage males like - I might have subscribed to some inaccurate stereotypes but I am pretty convinced that men are very juvenile.)

As a teen and then woman in her twenties, I cannot imagine myself ever enjoying bukkake.

When I was young, I did glance over the odd Japanese bukkake video out of curiosity, but I didn’t enjoy a second of it. One actress I remembered had a really pained, nauseated and humiliated expression throughout, and I firmly identified with that. I know in theory it doesn’t hurt to get my face cummed on by many men, but I would have been so humiliated by having so many men treat me as a cumdump. And I mean humiliated in a non-enjoyable way.

But in my thirties, I started getting just that little bit turned on by such degrading treatment. I put it down to me becoming more in tune with my feminine identity. I’m a woman, so I deserve lots of sperm, so give me all you’ve got. That’s how I thought.

Now in my forties, I find myself craving this kind of sex. I want men to be absolutely powerful, totally virile, with big sexual organs, crazy-long staying power, and an infinitely huge sperm production capability. And I want guys to cum and cum and cum. I want your sperm all over my face, all over my food, everywhere! I find myself having the fantasies that young men almost certainly have. When I was a teen I would have screamed and fled from a big penis. At my age, I would be quite happy to grab it, kneel, slap my face with the penis, lick it all over. It’s a total change.

One video I glanced over in the past, featured a young woman being soaked in a bathtub of semen. She didn’t look that happy, and I felt it was extremely humiliating and ‘abusive’.

But at my age, I’m wondering. What’s so humiliating? What’s so abusive? It doesn’t hurt to be soaked in a sperm bath. It’s fun!

I await others’ responses before adding more to this post.
Click to expand...
This milf ******* my cum from a glass not too long ago.
 
Angelyn said:
Although most of the porn I watch has been criticized for objectifying women, I still watch with a 'female eye'. I always look at the woman's face and kind of replicate her expressions on my face. I never look at the man's face. I want her to be brutally fucked, but I still want to be the fuckee.

As for the fucker, I find that it is impossible to say that the porn also does not objectify men. I mean, I watch all that hardcore stuff, and I don't even care about the man's name. To me, all porn guys exist as drones for their queen bees. The woman is the star of the show.

I really could not care less how much pleasure he gets. I just want him to be big and hard. And I don't just mean his genitals; I want his everything to be big and hard - thigh muscles, butt, stomach muscles, shoulders, every piece of meat on his bones. Instinctively I want to grab and pinch all that muscle and it had better be unyielding like a good man should be!

Back when I was a teenage girl seeking companionship and love, I would never have thought that I can watch a porn film and not look higher than a man's neck. Are you kidding me?

But these days are long over. I got companionship from other girls when I was that age, and I wasn't that sociable to begin with, so I never needed men that badly.

Now what I'll like: Hook up with a guy, and spend all my time, if not on his cock, balls and ass, then resting my face on his chest with eyes closed and just appreciating the firmness and smell and breathing. I don't care to look into his eyes and look for love anymore. I'm just here to extract his sperm. In fact, because I don't know how I might handle falling in love, I even want to avoid his eyes. I'm kinda of afraid of commitment at this point. Am I supposed to lose my rationality and move in with him and give up my freedom?

So in many ways I am thinking and behaving like a stereotypical man, right? Women are supposed to be emotional and seek love, but I am the one who wants to be rational and prefer to remain free and unattached. Is that what happens when I approach menopause and estrogen and female hormones get suppressed? (Come on girls, give me a response!)
Click to expand...
In most of the porn the women are not even wet which tells me they are not really enjoying it. I think getting turned on by porn is not the same as desiring.Many women get aroused by violent movies but do not want violence. Fucked hard or having cum on your face is not being dominated or humiliated. If you talk to people who know about bdsm they will explain that the sub is often in charge. Women do change and desire changes and maybe you just need to accept it and give yourself permission to explore
 
I’m wondering if there is anybody here that has dealt with a total hysterectomy? My wife had one a little over a year ago. Since then she has zero libido. We have sex maybe once every 4-6 weeks and frankly it nowhere near as fun because she’s clearly struggling to get into it. Any tips would be appreciated. FYI, she doesn’t want to do hormone replacement because she’s afraid of cancer etc.
 
Angelyn said:
Hi folks

I have wanted to write this article for a long time. Finally I psyched myself into writing it.

I am hoping to stimulate some discussion. I have no objection to the moderators moving this article to any thread where they deem more appropriate.


OK I’ll get to the point. It’s a point I hate dwelling on and will understandably often skirt, but it is really important to me and affects me more than I normally confess to.

I’m getting older.

Apart from other changes in my life and body, I also notice that my sexual fantasies are changing. In fact, not just changing, but changing a lot.

I’m not the same girl I was. My sexual identity is changing in ways that I don’t understand. This definitely affects how I react to the porn that I like to watch so much.

Maybe I am nearing menopause and my hormones are changing. But I am very far from being hot tempered or emotionally volatile yet. I don’t think my hormone levels have gone out of control. It’s just a vague sense that I seem to be turning more masculine in my sexual urges.

One of the things that I’ve become mildly obsessed with, is inspecting my face for facial hair because I’m convinced that as my sexual desires become more ‘male’ due to increased levels of testesterone, I should get more facial hair. Actually none of that has happened yet.

So what’s going on?

I find myself increasingly being turned on by things that I would have been turned off by when younger. Usually it is the kind of thing that teenage males like. (At least, that's what I believe teenage males like - I might have subscribed to some inaccurate stereotypes but I am pretty convinced that men are very juvenile.)

As a teen and then woman in her twenties, I cannot imagine myself ever enjoying bukkake.

When I was young, I did glance over the odd Japanese bukkake video out of curiosity, but I didn’t enjoy a second of it. One actress I remembered had a really pained, nauseated and humiliated expression throughout, and I firmly identified with that. I know in theory it doesn’t hurt to get my face cummed on by many men, but I would have been so humiliated by having so many men treat me as a cumdump. And I mean humiliated in a non-enjoyable way.

But in my thirties, I started getting just that little bit turned on by such degrading treatment. I put it down to me becoming more in tune with my feminine identity. I’m a woman, so I deserve lots of sperm, so give me all you’ve got. That’s how I thought.

Now in my forties, I find myself craving this kind of sex. I want men to be absolutely powerful, totally virile, with big sexual organs, crazy-long staying power, and an infinitely huge sperm production capability. And I want guys to cum and cum and cum. I want your sperm all over my face, all over my food, everywhere! I find myself having the fantasies that young men almost certainly have. When I was a teen I would have screamed and fled from a big penis. At my age, I would be quite happy to grab it, kneel, slap my face with the penis, lick it all over. It’s a total change.

One video I glanced over in the past, featured a young woman being soaked in a bathtub of semen. She didn’t look that happy, and I felt it was extremely humiliating and ‘abusive’.

But at my age, I’m wondering. What’s so humiliating? What’s so abusive? It doesn’t hurt to be soaked in a sperm bath. It’s fun!

I await others’ responses before adding more to this post.
Click to expand...
I think everyone's sexual tastes and needs change. Me, for example. I crave my wife getting defiled by a big black cock.
 
My wife just turned 34 and we've noticed some change in her sexual awareness. So I've helped nourish those feelings. Which has over time led us towards cuckolding. She knows she has me and always will, she has comfort, stability, and the man she wants romance from. I was her first so we both love the idea of exploring her "slutty side" together. Something she never got to do in her earlier years. I was with many women before we met so being with other women doesn't excite me as much as watching my wife.
 
Mr&Ms TopCat said:
I am 46 years old and I have always had a high sex drive, but it has escalated to an even higher intensity over the last few years. I get so creamy for my BF @TopCat by dirty talking to him prior to sex. And I continue to cream heavily during our sexcapades. I never need lube thank goodness. The only time I need lube is for anal.
Click to expand...

I wonder if getting wet automatically IS the gold standard for having a high sex drive?

In which case I suspect most women can be said not to be sexually driven at the sight of penises. I really, really do not get wet at penis photos and have never, never gotten wet looking at penises in my life. Same with almost everyone I know.

But most women have their own situations and circumstances where they get wet. I cream if the atmosphere is the correct (but complex) mix of humiliation, domination, forbidden-ness, etc.
 
Angelyn said:
I wonder if getting wet automatically IS the gold standard for having a high sex drive?

In which case I suspect most women can be said not to be sexually driven at the sight of penises. I really, really do not get wet at penis photos and have never, never gotten wet looking at penises in my life. Same with almost everyone I know.

But most women have their own situations and circumstances where they get wet. I cream if the atmosphere is the correct (but complex) mix of humiliation, domination, forbidden-ness, etc.
Click to expand...
Angelyn,

I'd say getting wet is the manifestation of what's going on in the brain. The setting is right, your brain goes into overdrive and the result is that you get wet.

I agree that I'm not turned on by the sight of a penis, either in a picture or in real life. But it's the setting that flips the switch. What am I thinking at the time? What is my environment? Am I motivated? Has past, similar situation brought pleasure? All these issues figure into the the complex equation of getting turned on.

But one can't discount anticipation! When I know something is going to be pleasurable in the near future, then I start a slow burn that makes me very eager by the time it starts to happen, I'm more than ready to go!

An excellent example is when I'm going to be seeing my Bull. Most of the time, we meet on Saturdays at about 4PM. The prior Wednesday, I'm starting to think about it. Thursday, I'm dwelling on it. Friday I'm like a cat on a hot tin roof and don't even talk to me on Saturday! Is this conditioning? Probably, but I'm not going to argue!

That's my perspective in a nutshell. But I will caution you that every girl is different, as you well know. So what works for me may do the exact opposite for the woman standing next to me!

But generally, I agree with you!

Donna
 
Dblinsey said:
I agree that I'm not turned on by the sight of a penis, either in a picture or in real life. But it's the setting that flips the switch. What am I thinking at the time? What is my environment? Am I motivated? Has past, similar situation brought pleasure? All these issues figure into the the complex equation of getting turned on.

But one can't discount anticipation! When I know something is going to be pleasurable in the near future, then I start a slow burn that makes me very eager by the time it starts to happen, I'm more than ready to go!



Donna
Click to expand...

I don't have a bull, but I agree with you that anticipation is absolutely important for women.

Men ALWAYS think that they can just unzip, show their penises, and get women turned on. This is a very idiotic male thing that applies to 16 and 60 guys equally. No matter how much sexual experience a guy has had, he still thinks that his dick turns on women. Which is so stupid. It's probably a myth propagated by the media and reinforced endlessly by low quality literature, porn movies, etc that guys read and watch.

My own never-fail meter of sexual arousal is my red face. If something causes ******* to rush to my face, I'll get turned on.
 
Angelyn said:
I don't have a bull, but I agree with you that anticipation is absolutely important for women.

Men ALWAYS think that they can just unzip, show their penises, and get women turned on. This is a very idiotic male thing that applies to 16 and 60 guys equally. No matter how much sexual experience a guy has had, he still thinks that his dick turns on women. Which is so stupid. It's probably a myth propagated by the media and reinforced endlessly by low quality literature, porn movies, etc that guys read and watch.

My own never-fail meter of sexual arousal is my red face. If something causes ******* to rush to my face, I'll get turned on.
Click to expand...

We probably share the same like/dislikes in this regard as most women do. The anticipation is what's the major turn-on for me. This probably speaks to the desire for women to think of a perfect evening is dressing, being taken to a nice restaurant, maybe a few drinks at the bar, before going home and 'getting busy' - it's all that time in anticipation that provides her (us) with the opportunity to ramp up for a good time.

Dick pics just do absolutely nothing for me!

I think we all have a 'tell' how another person can determine if we're turned on or not. With me, it's two things. One is that I'll constantly hook my hair behind my ear and the other is that I'll catch myself crossing and uncrossing my legs. My husband has mentioned them on more than one occasion!
 
Dblinsey said:
We probably share the same like/dislikes in this regard as most women do. The anticipation is what's the major turn-on for me. This probably speaks to the desire for women to think of a perfect evening is dressing, being taken to a nice restaurant, maybe a few drinks at the bar, before going home and 'getting busy' - it's all that time in anticipation that provides her (us) with the opportunity to ramp up for a good time.

Dick pics just do absolutely nothing for me!

I think we all have a 'tell' how another person can determine if we're turned on or not. With me, it's two things. One is that I'll constantly hook my hair behind my ear and the other is that I'll catch myself crossing and uncrossing my legs. My husband has mentioned them on more than one occasion!
Click to expand...

Two women with true discriminating taste and style, and more valuable than
Naive, gullible dupes whose imaginations are narrow and without scope
Or, insight
 
I too have changed with age. My sexual fantasy in my younger years were pretty vanilla... no sex before marriage, and the same man for the rest of my life. But now, I live my fantasy of fucking as many guys as possible. Not just any guy. Guys who know how to bring it... who care about my orgasm as much as their own, and who leave me wanting more. Guys who know how to treat a girl.
 
StevieGirl said:
I too have changed with age. My sexual fantasy in my younger years were pretty vanilla... no sex before marriage, and the same man for the rest of my life. But now, I live my fantasy of fucking as many guys as possible. Not just any guy. Guys who know how to bring it... who care about my orgasm as much as their own, and who leave me wanting more. Guys who know how to treat a girl.
Click to expand...

Any man who does not put your orgasmic ******* first is not worthy of you , or more especially ....worth spending time inside your delicious womb. You need
And deserve a man who will cherish you snd , then willingly surrender you to other men to utterly enjoy snd thoroughly ravage you. Ummmm
 
StevieGirl said:
I too have changed with age. My sexual fantasy in my younger years were pretty vanilla... no sex before marriage, and the same man for the rest of my life. But now, I live my fantasy of fucking as many guys as possible. Not just any guy. Guys who know how to bring it... who care about my orgasm as much as their own, and who leave me wanting more. Guys who know how to treat a girl.
Click to expand...

I want to take you and literally, make you scream and cream ...scream some more
Beggging for more intense, endless pleasure...always yearning for more
 
Dblinsey said:
I think we all have a 'tell' how another person can determine if we're turned on or not. With me, it's two things. One is that I'll constantly hook my hair behind my ear and the other is that I'll catch myself crossing and uncrossing my legs. My husband has mentioned them on more than one occasion!
Click to expand...

That's pretty common for women; I have friends who exhibit both tells.

The funny thing about me is, the crossing and uncrossing legs part doesn't work, and it is probably because of some life decisions I made many years ago.

I wear pants nearly all the time. This has allowed me to sit in a more relaxed or casual manner. I have a tendency not to sit with knees close together. Since I'm comfortable already, I don't attempt to attract attention to myself by crossing and uncrossing legs.
 
Angelyn said:
That's pretty common for women; I have friends who exhibit both tells.

The funny thing about me is, the crossing and uncrossing legs part doesn't work, and it is probably because of some life decisions I made many years ago.

I wear pants nearly all the time. This has allowed me to sit in a more relaxed or casual manner. I have a tendency not to sit with knees close together. Since I'm comfortable already, I don't attempt to attract attention to myself by crossing and uncrossing legs.
Click to expand...

Ironically, some owned by black women are not allowed to cross their legs.
Personally, that's your choice...not mine. Tells are significant. The hair teitl is
Attractive and always appeals to my dick
 
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