Becoming more and more obsessed

Hi,

I am sure you have heard this kind of story many times. In fact I'm sure lots of you have lived it, but I've reached a point where I want it to become more real for me and talk with like minded people.

I am a white male, 30 years old. I've always been attracted to women, especially a hot blonde with big tits. And like any straight man I enjoyed watching porn with all these incredibly sexy women. Now and again, through searching for or finding a hot girl i found attractive, I would end up watching an interracial scene, just because that was the scene this girl was in. At the time I didn't think anything of it and didn't distinguish between what kind of man the girl was fucking (at least I didn't think I did). However, as time went on I found myself watching more and more interracial porn. I realised all my favourite pornstars were ones who did a lot of IR. I began searching out IR porn, typing in things like 'blonde interracial', 'black owned' and 'BBC' into the search bars (instead of pornstar names or 'big tits'). Finally it got to the point where I only watched interracial porn. It didn't matter how hot the woman was or what she was doing in the scene, if she wasn't with a black man it meant nothing to me. I don't feel like I made a conscious effort in any of this, it just happened.

I became obsessed, watching more and more IR and fantasising about seeing women with BBC. It was amazing watching those IR clips, seeing the women dominated by the black man, totally submitting to them and reaching levels of ******* I had never given to a woman in my life. Then it hit me, I was attracted to the power of the black man. I had naturally realised that he was superior, that he was the better *******. He deserved our women and he fucked them right. It didn't take me long to fully accept that black men are superior and after that there was no turning back.

After passing that point, I began to explore my fantasies deeper. I started to think about how I could show my respect to the black man, show him that I know he is better. I fantasised about being on my knees for him, sucking his black cock and thanking him for the privilege. Now I don't know if this makes me gay, bi or if I am still straight, and frankly I don't care. This has been a natural progression for me and something I feel I have had no power over. All I know for sure is that this is something I want to explore and experience.

Now I am getting married in the summer, but I still fantasise about serving a black man. I don't think I will ever stop, I'm obsessed and can't change that now.

Thank you to anyone who bothered to read all this. Like I said at the beginning, I've got to the point where I want to explore this more and make it more real. Happy to chat with anyone on here who has gone through similar or feels the same. In fact happy to chat to anyone about any aspect of IR.
 
Back
Top