Any regrets not getting ex-wife/GF into BBC?

Just curious if any other cucks regret not introducing your ex-wife or GF into the BBC lifestyle. I’m a bit older now and think often about my ex’s being with black men, a huge turn on. My first gf, 18, super sexy, blonde, always seemed to blush when a sexy black man was near, this was 25 years ago, so IR relationships were not widely accepted. A year after we broke up, I learned that she had been with multiple black guys, which made me even more attracted to her, but she had moved. My ex-wife was very conservative, great looking, but I never had the courage to bring it up. If she had only known how many time I visualized her riding a black stud when I came home from work. I will not be in a relationship again with hour at least trying. It is too powerful.
 
Yes, I regret not letting her have sex with other men (black probably because I believe the percentage of big penis is in the black race and higher than white) and she would have wanted the bigger (she always used the biggest dildo and left the small in the drawer). If I had let her have sex with black men she might still be with me & I'd be sharing her pussy rather than using my hand now all alone. She told me before she married me she had sex with a 9 inch black guy and loved it. I don't know why she married/stayed with me for 16 years because I have a tiny white cock. She's now living in a black community but I don't know what's going on there. So there you go that's my story.
 
Yes, I regret not letting her have sex with other men (black probably because I believe the percentage of big penis is in the black race and higher than white) and she would have wanted the bigger (she always used the biggest dildo and left the small in the drawer). If I had let her have sex with black men she might still be with me & I'd be sharing her pussy rather than using my hand now all alone. She told me before she married me she had sex with a 9 inch black guy and loved it. I don't know why she married/stayed with me for 16 years because I have a tiny white cock. She's now living in a black community but I don't know what's going on there. So there you go that's my story.
Who knows. Maybe she is living her dream. Why she moved there? Why she told.you that she had a 9 inch bbc...
 
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