Alternative Lifestyle - IR Cuckold

I recently watched an interview with the feminist author Germaine Greer on the BBC (now, now the broadcasting company I mean!) and she touched upon female sexuality and marriage.

She seemed to express that monogamy was not in the interest of women and cited research showing that in terms of happiness, various relationship permutations showed the following:
Married men - most happy
Single women - second
Married women - third
Single men - least happy

It is old-hat that most religions are obsessed about female sexuality and have devised numerous edicts and precepts to control women. These dictates are not only reinforced by religious texts and social mores but are internalized by women themselves. In many religions and societies there a 2 ways at looking at women - the virgin and the whore. There is almost a paranoia that if women are too sexual all of society and life as we know it will come to an end!

And even now as religion loses its grip (in the West) these concepts are still often propounded by a male dominated media and marriage is still seen as the only way for couples to live together. Anyway you could talk forever on the staggering hypocrisy and immorality surrounding female sexuality and the lengths societies and religions have gone to control it, but here I want to discuss alternatives to the standard monogamous relationship.

Germaine talked of a female sexuality that allowed the female to be desirous and exploratory, to not be purely the object of male sexual desire but to be pro-active in her desires too. I agree with this wholeheartedly but how are we to live in relationships that are mutually rewarding for all parties?

There are a numerous options, depending on individual sexualities and circumstances, but I'm interested in the possibility of interracial cuckold relationships. Such a relationship is, of course, only relevant to a white couple of which both parties are excited by interracial sex, but can there be a successful match between a white female who is attracted to big black men and a white male who is aroused by his partner fucking black men?

When I say relationship I am referring to a long-term relationship, but what is a successful relationship? It cannot be measured by longevity as often couples stay unhappily together for the sake of the *******, worried what the neighbours and family may think, too costly to part or it's just too much of an hassle to start over again. It surely can only be measured in terms of the emotional, mental and physical satisfaction and well-being of the parties concerned.

This does not mean forming a relationship that is purely indulgent and servile to the senses and has no boundaries. Rather a relationship where both parties are aware and considerate of each others' needs and desires, and are open enough to disclose and discuss them with each other. A relationship should also be about setting and achieving goals both as a couple and as individuals.

I can say what I want from the perspective of a white cuckold but cannot really know whether this is compatible or complementary with any partner, ultimately it is only the living of the relationship that will highlight this.

As a man I do want many of the things often associated with a marriage (ah! The irony of that!) such as intimacy, love, friendship and doing things together but as a cuckold, and hence sexually, I want other things too.

As a cuckold I want (need) to be the beta male in the bedroom whereas big black men will be the alpha and dominant men. This is not punishment but how I am sexually 'at home' and at ease. It is for my partner and her black bulls to decide on what sexual access I have to my partner or if I'm to be denied altogether.

I believe there are so many exciting avenues to be explored in interracial sex and doing the exploring as a white cuckold couple makes it a safer adventure than doing it alone. I want my partner to experience the joys of her sexuality and not be confined to what I could provide sexually - God forbid! I do have one limitation though, namely my partner would only fuck black men, as such, it is paramount that she really likes big black men!

Could such a relationship really be successful? I would gain sexual pleasure (both vicarious and real) from my partner but she would gain most sexual pleasure from her black bulls, so sexually we wouldn't be reciprocal - is this a problem? I don't know is the answer, and this is for a female to answer rather than me.

Perhaps the sexual aspect should not be the focus as both sides receive pleasure from the black bull fucking the white woman. Maybe the main question is what does a white female gain from having a cuckold relationship?

It is my belief that my partner will gain from having a male partner who shows the more feminine side of masculinity including greater intimacy, empathy, tactility and support. These are qualities that may not set the bed on fire but are important for a successful long-term relationship. The fire and excitement would come from big black men.

Ultimately though, perhaps for most people it isn't the type of relationship that matters but the characteristics of the people involved and how well they complement or conflict with each other. Still, for me the interracial cuckold relationship is important, but more important is the partner I find to share its pleasures and our future.

Wayne
 
Bearing in mind that Germaine Greer is NOT very highly "thought of" by modern women in the UK, and is commonly seen as being personally responsible for the "taking away" of choice for women to be a homemaker/mom, for her own financial gain, nowadays however she is even less "thought of" for trying to be sexually controversial by using the internet to find out what people are into sexually, whilst claiming to be knowledgable in these matters and writing about it, once again, for financial gain even though she has no experiance of these matters herself.
It's very easy to write stuff, but in my opinion you have to live it to know it.
 
Fair point regarding Germaine, but I'm more interested in the possibilites of the ir cuckold lifestyle really. Wherever money is involved and to be gained it questions a person's sincerity and true opinions, but anyone who questions normality is worth an open ear. I agree with the point of minimising the importance and value of homemaker and mom but that's more to do with the capitalist system than Germaine - if you can't get any money out of it then it ain't worth *******! That's Obama & Cameron speak, not mine! Both a disgrace to their respective races!
 
Cuckoldry is something that will always remain talked about in hush-hush manner, and one of the reason why is because of the perceived negativity most look at it. I personally prefer it remaining that way.
 
Yes, despite the pleasure that a cuckold relationship could bring I would prefer to keep it under wraps for the benefit of my family etc. That also applies to many fetishes or alternative lifestyles that couples may have.
 
Thanks MacNfries. I do see possibilities in this lifestyle but I'm not interested in having multiple partners myself only in having a partner who has sex with black men. Will delve deeper though as may be more successful in finding the right lady that way rather via the cuckold route.
 
Brit, have you ever considered the polyamory lifestyle? This is growing more and more popular. (see links) ;)

http://www.thedailybeast.com/newsweek/2009/07/28/only-you-and-you-and-you.html
http://sensualforyou.com/
http://www.polyamorouslifestyle.com/

I am poly, myself. I find that when I have the freedom to love the men I have sex with, it means more to me. It also allows me to love my hubby by loving other men. I have found it impossible not to love the men I have had sex with, to some degree. How can I not feel love toward a man who I am making love to or with?

I am in-love with the man who lives with us, as much as I am with the man I am married to. I am also as much in love with several of my regular lovers, many of whom I have had a relationship with for years now.

I do allow my hubby to be with other women when he has the opportunity. Although his opportunities are rare, I do like it when he can hook up. I feel that by allowing him to be with other women (or men) that I am loving him as much as when I have sex with other men.

I am not bi, but hubby is. And it has pleased both of us when we have been able to find men who allow both of us to please them. The men who have allowed both of us to please them are usually of much higher caliber as human beings.

I have only been in the poly lifestyle for 6 years, but I have seen a lot of cucking within the poly lifestyle, just as much as I have seen in the swinging lifestyle. It makes sense when you consider that women are able to attract men easier than men can attract women.

More in the poly lifestyle do you see bi men as more acceptable than in the swinging lifestyle. Yet, cucking is much more acceptable in the swinging lifestyle than most might think.

Within both the swinging and the poly communities you will notice the men whos wives have sex much more often than the husbands. And often with the same partners. Many men get their wives into swinging in hopes of having more sex with other women, but more often you see husbands watching their wives with other men. That is cucking.

In the poly lifestyle you see the alphas and the betas as well. Many wives have primaries who are not their husbands. And many times the actual husband becomes the tertiary.

In the swinging community it is not uncommon for a wife to have sex with several men and the husband not to get any sex. This is cucking as well.

The poly community is a wonderful place for men who want to be cuckolded because it allows cuck men to allow and for their wives to have other lovers who often become the wife's primary lover.

In my situation I have 5 men whom I consider to be my primaries. Three of them are married, only 2 of them the wives do not know. The 2 men whos wives are unaware of my relationship with their husbands would I not consider poly. Poly is about trust and honesty.

The 2 married men I have sex with, whos wives do not know, I do so because I love them. Yet, I realize that I can only love them away from their wives. When their wives are near, I must respect their relationship. This is also a way that I love these men.

The one married man whom I have sex with an average of 4-5 times a week is the husband of a very close friend. Because of a spinal injury, she cant have sex with her husband. And she has liked that I have been willing to have sex with her husband for the last 4 years on a regular basis. She has admitted that me having sex with her husband has strengthened their relationship.

When my hubby was an active pastor, he cucked men by having sex with their wives, but this was by agreement with all persons involved. Cucking is more prevalent than most people realize.

It is my opinion that the best communities for cucking are both the swinging and the poly communities. It is not only a good place for this to happen, but it is also a place where it is most acceptable. These are also communities most conducive to the cucking lifestyle.
 
..... When my hubby was an active pastor, he cucked men by having sex with their wives, but this was by agreement with all persons involved.

Now, that comment I'd love you to expand on, actually. So your husband was a pastor ... of a church? Interesting. By the way my ******* is a Methodist minister of 2 churches; actually called a "layman", as the layman is the substitute or assisting minister in the Methodist churches. The advantage of the layman minister is that the Methodist church does not rotate the layman out to other churches every 4-8 years as they do the regular ministers.
Anyways, my point is, when I was 17, my friends and I visited a XXXvideo store where they have the little booths with the curtains, and you stand and drop quarters into the video machine and watch fuck fliks. I was watching one and through the crack of the curtain I saw the regular minister of our church come in, go into a booth and start watching fuck fliks ... his curtain wasn't pulled all the way closed and I could see him jerking his cock off to the vids.
I thought that was so frik'n funny, and I never looked at that minister again in the same light ... now I realize that ministers are "human too". Mac :)
 
My hubby never had sex with anyone in his congregation until he was asked to head the couples therapy group for the church. Couples from all over the metro area came to these group therapy sessions. My hubby hosted the group therapy sessions and afterward would see couples one on one, either at his office or at their homes.

The sessions were meant to help the couples rebuild or strengthen their relationships. There were certain couples where the husband had lost his ability to attain or sustain an erection or had lost his sense of masculinity, These were the couples that my hubby brought up poly and alternative relationships to.

My hubby doesn't have length, but he does have girth. And since he is Tantric, he has the ability to not only sustain an erection for extended periods of time. He also has a thorough understanding of the human body, especially the female body. My hubby was able to teach the wives of the couples about female ejaculation and how they can experience it. And the husbands got to learn from my hubby how to be the men their wives needed them to be.

The husbands were able to see their wives experience another man the way the wives wanted to to experience their husbands. This was a breakthrough for many couples. Other couples were able to grow closer by allowing black men to join them, sexually.

One couple experienced my hubby on several occasions, then my hubby and a black man. It took the wife getting gang banged by my hubby and 4 black men for this one couple to realize what they needed in their marriage to make them both happy.

Many people might think that the therapy my hubby used was/is un-Christian. This therapy didn't lead the couples away from the church. It taught them how to live a happier life with each other. It taught them how the other needed to be loved. The husbands and wives learned about each other and learned how to make each other happy. And my hubby was a big part of that happening. I don't see that as a bad thing.

I know one of the couples that my hubby counseled. They still go to church every Sunday morning, evening and Wednesday night. They are active in the church. The husband is one of the church Deacons.

Since getting involved in an alternative lifestyle, this husband and wife are closer now than they ever could have been had my husband not only slept with the wife, but the couple took it a step further and involved other men in their love making.

It is not uncommon for couples to need others to help improve their relationship. I am glad that my hubby had the chance to assist the couples he did. I like that my hubby got to bed the wives and the husbands got to watch. I am also glad that my hubby had the knowledge and the ability to help those couples the way he did. This is pastoral care.
 
My hubby never had sex with anyone in his congregation until he was asked to head the couples therapy group for the church. Couples from all over the metro area came to these group therapy sessions. My hubby hosted the group therapy sessions and afterward would see couples one on one, either at his office or at their homes.... The husbands were able to see their wives experience another man the way the wives wanted to to experience their husbands. One couple experienced my hubby on several occasions....it took the wife getting gang banged by my hubby and 4 black men for this one couple to realize what they needed in their marriage to make them both happy.

Many people might think that the therapy my hubby used was/is un-Christian. This therapy didn't lead the couples away from the church..... This is pastoral care.

Thought you might appreciate these interesting pics ...

pic_Priest-06-FatherLester.jpg
cartoon_Priest&sex.jpg
 
And even now as religion loses its grip (in the West) these concepts are still often propounded by a male dominated media and marriage is still seen as the only way for couples to live together. Anyway you could talk forever on the staggering hypocrisy and immorality surrounding female sexuality and the lengths societies and religions have gone to control it, but here I want to discuss alternatives to the standard monogamous relationship.



Wayne

Be careful with that statement on religion losing a hold: All happen in cycles and religion is coming back in full ******* in a few decades. The family units drive it's social place and function. The strong families of the early 20th century gave way to the baby mamas and dead beat dads and gay couples with adopted ******* of today but that does not last...

The traditional family returns, as it does in time always, and so too religion and 'family and social values' (whatever those really mean since around the globe there are different standards) along with religion.



This is an interesting book, even if you might not agree with it.
How the West Really Lost God: A New Theory of Secularization [Hardcover]
http://www.amazon.com/How-West-Really-Lost-Secularization/dp/1599473798

Female sexuality is not as simple to pigeonhole it into something that religion could control or direct, even if it wanted to and tried to. A careful study of history reveals these expressions of female sexuality in all times and cultures. I feel that you make the issue too reduced.

I am not looking to argue, just to say your view does not account for the whole complexity. No post on the internet could however so that is not criticism. Some women and couples do like monogamy, by choice even. Not my choice, not that of many women I know and sleep with, but just as how pair bonded non swinger couples can't see how people can be swingers and fuck so many others, so too is the hardship of understanding by some swingers and free lovers as to how some people can just join up and only have sex with one other person...
 
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