Advice, tips, suggestions ,etiquette for swinging

Hoodbunny

Couple
From
NY, US
Always open to hearing advice from others too

We been in the lifestyle for 10 years now. Just some observations from our experiences or from stuff people we meet with have told us. Nobody is perfect btw.


1. Some couples will never meet alone. Dont bother pushing it and its not always hubby that wants both there, sometimes its the wife. If you dont want hubby watching that should be one of the 1st things you say.

2. Some couples have a bi husband and want to play together. For those curious I am straight. If you are straight men meeting with couples I suggest you make sure hubby is straight before talks get too far along. If you are bi males either as couples or the males meeting, you owe it to whoever you are talking to, to let them know before talks get too far as they have a right to know. Its the polite proper thing to do as nobody likes surprises like that.

3. Some couples, like us, the husband is the one who does the screening usually. If you cant accept that then say sorry thanks for your time and move on. Ive had men tell me they only will talk to her and its cool as we just usually go our separate ways. I have let my wife know they will only talk to her and she usually says shes not interested if they wont talk to me. Its a comfort thing. Sorry but if I am going to let you fuck my wife the least you can do is talk to me.

4. Some couples you are not fucking the wife while cutting the hubby out of the entire deal. There are swingers and there are open marriages. Big differences. Most everyone in this lifestyle is a swinger. That means couples being couples about the lifestyle. I dont know why some guys just expect husbands to not be involved in the couples swinging activities. If you want single pussy dont get involved with swingers.

5. Some people are cool about pics or phone calls, some are not. Please make sure you state what you are comfortable with before meeting. Nobody should get mad if you give your preferences on privacy stuff before discussions get too far

6. Some people fail to make clear the things they are into before meeting. Surprises suck. They ruin the experience of a meet if people get a lists of dos and donts as they walk into the bedroom. Just be upfront what you are into and turnoffs when you first start chatting with someone.

7. Thankfully we never experienced this but we have heard stories from guys we meet with as well as other couples about one party or another where people are ungroomed and did not bathe or brush their teeth before meeting.
Tips: Do not eat foods that cause you Acid Reflux for at least 48 hours before meeting. Avoid dairy. Floss. brush your teeth and use mouthwash afterwards. Not all bad breath is caused by dirty teeth, some people have acid reflux that causes it.
Men, TRIM your fingernails, especially if you are going to finger a woman. Also nobody wants to see dirty fingernails.

8. Dont tell people your into something that you are not. Again, expectations. If a woman expects a dominant man that pulls hair and spanks and then gets quiet guy who only does missionary, its not going to be a good meet.
Dont tell people you have a 10 inch dick and then show up with 6 thin inches.
Dont use other peoples pics.
Dont invite a guy to your house or hotel and then wife isnt there. Had a guy tell us that happened to him once LOL. Poor bastard showed up to a guys house where he was supposed to meet the wife and instead he got some dude telling him the wife was out but hed suck him off. Thats pretty fucked up.
Dont agree to meet someone and then not show up.
Dont fucking pretend to be a woman or couple if you are just some perv whacking off to fantasies and making people think you are something else. Thats just fucking wrong.
Be honest about where you live. Some only like to meet people that they can see easily if they want future meets.
DO NOT LIE ABOUT BEING SINGLE. Not cool !

9. If you are loud when having sex, nothing wrong with that, please inform the others before meeting. It could be an issue if they have neighbors or require a change of place to fuck.

10. If you make a profile on a dating/swinger/social site, fill it out completely. It makes it easier to find compatible people to meet.

11. Try to respond to people. Ok in fairness I am awful at this one. I fully admit it. Like I said tho nobody is perfect.

Feel free to add your own
 
Dont tell people you have a 10 inch dick and then show up with 6 thin inches.
It's a myth that women are impressed by size and size alone. If you're a nice person, know how to hold a conversation and know how to treat a lady, you'll have success no matter how big or small you are.
I once knew a woman who is a lesbian, but I found her in bed one day with a man! I asked her how come, and she replied that "he treats me like a princess".
 
Always open to hearing advice from others too

We been in the lifestyle for 10 years now. Just some observations from our experiences or from stuff people we meet with have told us. Nobody is perfect btw.


1. Some couples will never meet alone. Dont bother pushing it and its not always hubby that wants both there, sometimes its the wife. If you dont want hubby watching that should be one of the 1st things you say.

2. Some couples have a bi husband and want to play together. For those curious I am straight. If you are straight men meeting with couples I suggest you make sure hubby is straight before talks get too far along. If you are bi males either as couples or the males meeting, you owe it to whoever you are talking to, to let them know before talks get too far as they have a right to know. Its the polite proper thing to do as nobody likes surprises like that.

3. Some couples, like us, the husband is the one who does the screening usually. If you cant accept that then say sorry thanks for your time and move on. Ive had men tell me they only will talk to her and its cool as we just usually go our separate ways. I have let my wife know they will only talk to her and she usually says shes not interested if they wont talk to me. Its a comfort thing. Sorry but if I am going to let you fuck my wife the least you can do is talk to me.

4. Some couples you are not fucking the wife while cutting the hubby out of the entire deal. There are swingers and there are open marriages. Big differences. Most everyone in this lifestyle is a swinger. That means couples being couples about the lifestyle. I dont know why some guys just expect husbands to not be involved in the couples swinging activities. If you want single pussy dont get involved with swingers.

5. Some people are cool about pics or phone calls, some are not. Please make sure you state what you are comfortable with before meeting. Nobody should get mad if you give your preferences on privacy stuff before discussions get too far

6. Some people fail to make clear the things they are into before meeting. Surprises suck. They ruin the experience of a meet if people get a lists of dos and donts as they walk into the bedroom. Just be upfront what you are into and turnoffs when you first start chatting with someone.

7. Thankfully we never experienced this but we have heard stories from guys we meet with as well as other couples about one party or another where people are ungroomed and did not bathe or brush their teeth before meeting.
Tips: Do not eat foods that cause you Acid Reflux for at least 48 hours before meeting. Avoid dairy. Floss. brush your teeth and use mouthwash afterwards. Not all bad breath is caused by dirty teeth, some people have acid reflux that causes it.
Men, TRIM your fingernails, especially if you are going to finger a woman. Also nobody wants to see dirty fingernails.

8. Dont tell people your into something that you are not. Again, expectations. If a woman expects a dominant man that pulls hair and spanks and then gets quiet guy who only does missionary, its not going to be a good meet.
Dont tell people you have a 10 inch dick and then show up with 6 thin inches.
Dont use other peoples pics.
Dont invite a guy to your house or hotel and then wife isnt there. Had a guy tell us that happened to him once LOL. Poor bastard showed up to a guys house where he was supposed to meet the wife and instead he got some dude telling him the wife was out but hed suck him off. Thats pretty fucked up.
Dont agree to meet someone and then not show up.
Dont fucking pretend to be a woman or couple if you are just some perv whacking off to fantasies and making people think you are something else. Thats just fucking wrong.
Be honest about where you live. Some only like to meet people that they can see easily if they want future meets.
DO NOT LIE ABOUT BEING SINGLE. Not cool !

9. If you are loud when having sex, nothing wrong with that, please inform the others before meeting. It could be an issue if they have neighbors or require a change of place to fuck.

10. If you make a profile on a dating/swinger/social site, fill it out completely. It makes it easier to find compatible people to meet.

11. Try to respond to people. Ok in fairness I am awful at this one. I fully admit it. Like I said tho nobody is perfect.

Feel free to add your own
Good advice. Thanks for sharing.
 
It's a myth that women are impressed by size and size alone. If you're a nice person, know how to hold a conversation and know how to treat a lady, you'll have success no matter how big or small you are.
I once knew a woman who is a lesbian, but I found her in bed one day with a man! I asked her how come, and she replied that "he treats me like a princess".

I am a short guy with an average penis, at best (yes i grows much bigger than my avatar pic). I have been able to attract many women by being well-groomed, decently dressed, and having good conversational skills. My only limiting factor is Money, and that comes and goes. But women like a guy who is interested in her, without seeming desperate. Willing to try fun things, without seeming like a pervert.
 
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