Advice... if your husband is simply not into it.

#1
Hi all

This is quite an important topic for me and I need some advice. Has anyone ever been in a relationship where the wife or girlfriend wanted to play around with black guys but the husband or boyfriend put his foot down and said no? I don’t want to end the marriage. It’s too complicated and there is too much at stake but I really want to expand our horizons and I am sure that he will not be into the idea at all.

The black guy I am dating suggested that we all go out for a drink together and “lay it on the line” to my husband. That is, my husband can either be enthusiastic or incur my boyfriend’s wrath, But I don’t want any conflict, and want to settle things by talking to my husband, without ay outside intervention. But I am at a loss what to say to him.Any advice would be welcome
 
#11
Really guys that's not what I implied. Sorry if it came across as otherwise.

My husband hasn't done anything wrong, and if we can't work it through, hopefully we will have an amicable parting. Besides, Jamaal said that he doesn't go in for physical violence, unless it is to defend a woman or her honour. That's chivelrous, but not aggressive. He's a baby at heart x
 

TwoBiFour

Couple
Gold Member
From
IN, US
#15
Hi all

my husband can either be enthusiastic or incur my boyfriend’s wrath,
Doesn't sound like a none violent scenario to me either, but glad you cleared that up.

Personally I think you need to re-evaluate your love for your husband. If you base your relationship only on sex and whether or not he will let you screw other guys - then maybe your Husband isn't the right man for you and should probably divorce, becasue forcing him into a cuckold relationship will land you there anyways. Maybe you love your bf instead??

Think of it this way - How would you feel if your husband came to you and said "Let me fuck the cute blond I work with or we are done." Are you willing to loose your husband just for some BBC fun?
 
#16
I have thought about it long and hard. My husband says that he loves me and couldn't handle a split. But I have reached the conclusion that I am going to leave him. That is, unless he really shapes up, gets a job and becomes a lot more accepting.

But I just can't bring myself to tell him that I want to end the marriage. I'm really scared of his reaction, he may do something crazy. That's why I want Jamaal to be around when I tell him. Jamaal can protect me.
 

falcondfw69

Male
Gold Member
From
NH, US
#17
I have thought about it long and hard. My husband says that he loves me and couldn't handle a split. But I have reached the conclusion that I am going to leave him. That is, unless he really shapes up, gets a job and becomes a lot more accepting.

But I just can't bring myself to tell him that I want to end the marriage. I'm really scared of his reaction, he may do something crazy. That's why I want Jamaal to be around when I tell him. Jamaal can protect me.
You think your husband might get violent? What leads you to say that?
 
#18
He's a little unpredictable, but he's more likely to get all teary and start sobbing and begging. I really can't handle that kind of scene. I think that my husband would be less likely to cause a scene like that if Jamaal was there to protect me.

Jamaal says that he is willing to be there when I tell my husband that I am leaving him. Or he says that he could wait in the car, and come and protect me if things got out of hand. I think that's really nice of Jamaal, he is so protective and such a gentleman.

I know I should handle this on my own, but I would be a lot more confident with Jamaal to back me up.
 

TwoBiFour

Couple
Gold Member
From
IN, US
#19
I have thought about it long and hard. My husband says that he loves me and couldn't handle a split. But I have reached the conclusion that I am going to leave him. That is, unless he really shapes up, gets a job and becomes a lot more accepting.

But I just can't bring myself to tell him that I want to end the marriage. I'm really scared of his reaction, he may do something crazy. That's why I want Jamaal to be around when I tell him. Jamaal can protect me.
I see, so what you are really looking for is advise on how to tell him you are leaving him. - Like a Band-Aid - quick. Most painful but faster to recover. If he does something crazy afterwords, it all on him.
 
#20
That's really well put, thanks for making it so clear.

I would consider staying with hubby if he fully supported me in my lifestyle choice, but Jamaal says that he doesn't want him touching me any more. That's understandable and hot, that Jamaal wants me to be his exclusive woman. Frankly I am flattered that Jamaal said this. He's so confident and assertive, such a contrast to my husband.

I don't want my husband sexually an more, and I'm sure he knows that given the way I act around the house. He says I act like a bitch but he drives me to it.

Last month he tried to initiate sex, he had some stupid aromatic candles in the bedroom, and they stank. He put rose petals on the bed and bought some cheap fizzy wine with his unemployment money, and put some soft music on. I had to tell him that I wasn't in the mood.

Basically that's what it's like in our household. Our sex life is non-existent - which is as good a reason as any to start afresh, right?
 
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